Forums » The Lounge » Read Thread

I hate it. And I have to suffer through it for a whole week. Guess what we did today! Stare at a picture of a guy's dick as a diagram for an hour. *gags*

I'm sure you'll be fine. You don't want to be ignorant, do you? 

We've had sex ed every year since fifth grade. I'm pretty sure everyone already knows all the risks to sex.

Have you learned about how awesome it is to cover yourself in gasoline and make love on a bed of embers?

Haha, very funny. I would rather not go up in flames.

You clearly lack the burning passion of a hormonally charged buffalo. 

You clearly do not lack vision. I like it. Tell me more.

I'm assuming you haven't hit puberty yet.

I think she's thirteen...?

I guess it strikes everyone at different times. 

I have. Two years ago. X_x

Ah. You don't have have sudden feelings of...say, lust? At all? 

x_x I'm in middle school! Of course not.

I suddenly feel quite old, quite old indeed.

I knew/know bitches from middle school who'd say the opposite.

Psh, right?

So am I. You don't see me complaining :P

put the crackers in the box - and then a baby comes out. be sure to wear a sock

That put me in mind of my favorite limerick(?).  : )

It wasn't that bad for me, but I guess that just depends on your teacher. Mine didn't really tell us much about why not to have sex, we learned to always wear a condom. My school has really outdated videos that have amazing lines such as "the penis becomes hard and satisfied" and "actually height does not effect the length of a penis. For example a tall man could have a smaller penis while a short man could have a much larger one."

We didn't have videos, we had films (Oh, the horror!).  And they were gawd-awful to say the least.  My knowledge of the dangers came from watching the news (The Internetz was barely a concept way back then, I think it was still the ARPANET; and the movie War Games was still a couple years away).

Sex Ed is by far the most entertaining class I had last year :P out teacher was this awesome nurse lady and she let us crack jokes and such! Not to mention the tampon lesson... Ho-boy, I wish you guys went to my school XD

Although two years ago, we were forced to watch the most...well, let's just say it covered a wide range of topics... >_>

I feel bad that my country, or at least my school, doesn't have this... is it a bad thing or a good thing?

I mean, the shit they teach you is already common knowledge (or at least in my case it was), so I can't really say. If you're really worried, google it. I heard there's this girl on YouTube whose entire channel is dedicated to sex ed.

Of course you'd want to know, you dirty boy! Lololol

... Hmmm, I tempted to ask for the name of the channel, but I won't...

 

I don't remember the name, however I think I know where I found the suggestion to it... If you really wanna know it's probably a good source, compared with the rest of the internet. I think.

Sex ed is fucking stupid. Just put a chapter in Biology class about the reproductive system and perhaps have some STD awareness seminars once every year or two.

Our biologists said she was gonna call a doc this year and he'd show us infected dicks but dunno if that will happen cause of the dude's busy schedule :( 

Depending on the teacher, he will either show infected dick picks or give out a meaningful explanation of the dangers of unprotected sex. Either way, best start packing some raincoats.

I only had Sex Ed in the fourth grade.  Then we moved, and I spent the remainder of my school days in more traditional rural districts.

Ugh, seventh grade sex-ed was the worst. Immature children, like myself at the time, sitting there giggling like little schoolgirls. Then they turned the projector on...

Well, in sixth grade sex ed, the teacher took a condom and blew it up like a balloon and let the kids hit it around the class.

We did that last years and we're in 9th grade XD

Can I come to this school? It sounds awesome.

Sounds like that class was beating around the bush.

If you know what I mean.

If you get what I mean ;)

@ Mtactical you'll need to move to Australia first 

Damn. Well, some of my friends are Austrailians, so.

Seventh grade, seventh grade... That was when my fourteen year old girlfriend moved back from California.  She and her younger sister (who was my age) pursued me relentlessly (not to mention all the local farm girls).  Man, those were the days.  Too bad that it's but a memory to me now.  :(

Can I ask how old you are, in the first place?

He's 42. 

Sadly, I'm no longer "the answer to life the universe and everything."  I just had a birthday.

Well, just one more year experienced, right?

Another day older and deeper in debt!  Saint Peter don't ya' call me 'cause I can't gooooooo...!!!

Is this the time that I cry out "Pics or GTFO"?

Ehm, yes. I believe I will do the same, as well.

Would cave paintings suffice?

I can work with it. Just make it Homo Habilis era, I can't read anything other than that.

Seventh Grade Sex-Ed was remarkably subdued for our class which was traditionally all about making sexual innuendo and dick jokes.

Had a whole week of sex education with three different speakers.

The dude was probably the most clinical about it. Boring really.

Next was a woman who was obviously uncomfortable talking about everything, but was the most graphic out of all of them. She focused on oral sex a little longer than average. (Awww yeah!)

The sassy black woman kept talking about AIDS and emphasizing that you can really catch it in the "booty hole." She was the most entertaining.

Finally for the last day the dude returned and went on a sudden rant at us that if we wanted to go out and get a bunch of sexually transmitted diseases, that was fine, nobody could stop us, but if we wanted to do the right thing, only we could do it.

Imitated his last little rant after class for cheap laughs. Great success!

You should make a storygame about that particular adventure.

My seventh grade sex-ed class was just plain traumatizing... But I guess 9th grade proved entertaining, especially considering one of my classmates (who was a guy) admitted to sticking a tampon up his ass for money. 

After about the age of nine, we moved to a farming community and Sex-Ed was more generalized.

"See what that bull's doing over there?  Well, you get the Idea..."

My most prominent memory of Sex ed is a cartoon of a man and a woman pillow fighting with big smiles on their faces...

We have the option to put up anonymous questions on a little slip of paper and have it answered the next day, and some of them were rather hilarious.

My favorite; 'Would it create a mutant if you have sex with a bear?'

Answer: 'No, you'd be dead.'

 

I remember that, actually. I think in one of mine someone asked: 

"How many balls do guys have?"

... I miss Grade Seven. XD

XD What grade are you in?

10th.  I hope.

5th grade -  Not sure why, but it was girls only.  Had a bunch of my fellow classmates unable to control themselves for weeks just giggling and running away from boys.  It just made the boys real pissed off at the girls for the rest of the year.

6th grade - Everyone got it this time, but now the boys were avoiding girls.  The kids who called themselves (couples) contemplated sex lolol.  Don't think anyone actually did it.

7th grade - Yet again everyone, but this time we watched videos concerning Internet safety, the benefits of abortion (made a lot of kids uncomfortable, I won't lie.), pedophilia, the works...STDs...also, quote of the year : "If you just orgasmed, and then pee'd right after, there's no way the leftover sperm can get anyone pregnant.  Besides, why the FUCK WOULD YOU WANT TO PISS IN A GIRL?!"

8th grade - Punched both guys and girls when they started spreading rumors about perfectly clean people boning each other.  Fun year.

Oh they were warning us about pedos like every damn day in elementary school. It was the height of the "Stranger Danger" era.

Still we got to watch a lot of video tapes about pedos instead of actually doing work so it wasn't all bad.

The best one was about "Big Bear, Little Bear" with live action people dressed in fur suits! I still can't believe they actually showed us Big Bear molesting Little Bear on camera though. It was still a child actor and an adult one playing the roles and his hand starts rubbing Little Bear's crotch and then ended it by briefly patting his ass.

I shit you not, it was Pedobear the Movie!

Hahaha!
 

Where can I find this? It sounds like the most messed up thing to show kids.

I think I tried looking it up again once out of curiosity, but I didn't do that hard of a search for it, out of a reluctance to be put on every FBI sexual predator list out there. Probably one of those teaching videos lost to time anyway.

The funny thing is they just suddenly pulled us out of class to show us this, wasn't like they gave us a permission slip the day before to have our parents to sign or anything.

It was like one day "Hey, we're going to show you all a very minor form of furry porn today to teach you about the dangers of pedos."

Didn't really have a resolution where Big Bear went to Bear jail or something either. It ended with Big Bear coming around again threatening to lock Little Bear in a basement because he told the Moose people (Big Moose and Little Moose, more furries naturally) and then he ran off when Big Moose arrived to confront him.

Big Bear being a bear, I can only assume came to his senses and remembered "Hey I'm a fucking bear, why am I running?" and then proceeded to maul and eviscerate Big Moose and then went back to rape Little Moose and Little Bear.

Circle of Life.

That might the the most fucked up thing I have ever read. 

Hahahaha! I can't stop laughing, I really want to see this shit.

Homeschooled + private Christian school + parents who never gave me the 'birds and the bees' talk. I think my only exposure to actual 'sex education' was this comic by Neil Gaiman. XD

That was pretty messed up!  (It explains a lot.)  xD

What, the comic? I think it's cute... but I'm biased, Death is one of my absolute favorite characters. ^_^

I never knew End's wife was in a comic...! :P

But seriously, how old were you when you saw this? I saw "Death" and "Banana" and I just thought: "Well, that's an odd contrast between light and dark" XD

Late teens, I'd imagine. But have you read Sandman? (If not, you should, it's awesome.) Death is about the least-dark personification of mortality imaginable. ^_^

 

Who said death was the dark thing in the story? :P banana's are downright...horrid.

XD

Lol.

E.T.A. Hoffmann or Marvel?

Uh... Neil Gaiman, writing for Vertigo?

Trying to find it online...  It seems that all the links are either broken or dead.  :(

Sorry, can't help you there, I have it in dead-tree format. XD

Haha.  That's the best format, IMO.  ; )

Well, guess what you're going to have shoved up yourself sooner or later... oh wait, are you guys not onto that yet?

And seriously. Who the hell complains about sex ed? 

Yes, we've learned about that. No, that's never gonna happen to me. If - If - I have children, they will all be adopted.

Well, I don't know about you, but I'd rather not stare at a guys dick for an hour.

Inb4 "You think that now, but just wait..." 9_9

Yes, it is. You just  need the right concoction of hormones and the right person...

You'll enjoy it, too. Crazy, eh? 

Dude... no.

TacocaT could be asexual, or lesbian. Not everyone is gonna have sex with a guy at some point in their lives. 9_9

Asexual isn't a real thing. Just because you don't feel attracted to most people doesn't mean you can't feel attraction at all. Most people just use it as an excuse.

THERE I SAID IT.

It's cool if she's a lesbian though.

...so what do you call people who are never attracted to anyone ever? Liars? >_<

I call them people with a really low to no sex drive. They don't need some sort of special category, lol.

Categories are useful, so why shouldn't we use them?

They create prejudice and often are only used so people think they're unique.

(And no this isn't sarcasm)

Huh. Okay... wanna debate that? XD

Why, I already know I'm right ^_^

Besides, what are you gonna argue, categories are good?

I'm still waiting for Ms. Right...

Not everyone is willing to compromise their morals.  And, no, it's not some religious belief.  It's just a moral one.

Yes I have a crush on a guy. No, I will refuse to ever do it with him or anyone else. I would rather give a child who has already been conceived a home than make a new one. Not lesbian or asexual.

I would imagine  that sounds very noble to you. 

Not really. Just my excuse for not wanting to have sex with anyone.

That's sounds pretty fair, I guess it's different for everyone and everyone's more or less horny that someone else.

You are going to do it at some point in your life... 

Abstinance just isn't a natural state for the average human being. 

It's pretty natural to me.  When I feel attraction to someone, all I have to do is wait for them to open their mouth and the problem generally resolves it's self.

I've made hundreds of excuses, too, over the years.  The truth is that I have old-fashioned ideals, and modern views are repulsive to my sensibilities.

Same. I'm not sure I approve of all the mindless sucking and fucking that occurs nowadays.... 

But I'm still pretty sure that a straight girl is going to have sex at least once. XD

Strong words, there. I don't suppose you'd care to debate the point? ^_^

I've never had any success at convincing others.  To me, it seems as if their instincts are stronger than their ability to reason.

You are a pretty strong debater, so give me a little time to think about it.

Sure! (And: thanks! ^_^)

I definitely won't hold it against you either way. I just like debates. ^_^

I read that as "I just like diabetes." 

...delicious, delcious diabetes. XD

No, but chances are, she will have some form of intercourse in her life... 

... And her being asexual isn't that likely, considering as she's discussed her attraction to a boy on the forums. 

Ahhh, I missed that. That does make it somewhat more likely. 9_9

I love how you snidely correct me without knowing the full equation. 

God, Morgan. Are you still hung over? XD

Well it happens to the best of us. Assumptions are human nature.

Most straight girls wouldn't be arguing that they'd never have sex with a guy! Taco is clearly an unusual case. :P

9_9

...*drinks coffee*...

O_O

...*stares into your SOUL*...

Adopted children suck. I'd rather be proud that I'm continuing my Middle Eastern bloodline and creating a new generation instead of some poor Autistic Spanish kids left on someone's doorstep.

Lol, and that's what everyone says, but then all of a sudden they're on their tenth child.

...I can't tell to what degree this is you exercising your hard-to-detect sense of humor, so... no comment. >_<

Along that train of thought, tacocat has a weird sense of what sex is if she thinks she's just going to stare at a guy's dick for an hour...

No, in sex ed, they put up a diagram of a guys dick. We stared at that for an hour in class. All kids who closed their eyes were assumed to be sleeping and the teacher whacked her ruler on you desk until you opened your eyes again.

I know what sex is, and I know I don't want to do it.

...there was presumably a lecture of some sort that went along with this, yes? o_O

Yes. We learned that 2 hundred million to 4 hundred million sperm is in one ejaculation.

...in an hour? >_<

Perhaps she learned the ruler-slap-wakey-wakey the hard way... 

Multiple times.

Oh yes, we also learned that man has tried to stick their dick in every hole availible on a person. Ass, mouth, the place it's supposed to go, and the ear. WHO WANTS A DICK IN THEIR EAR?

No one.

No one does that.

Ever.

They did that in an episode of Family Guy.

That episode was fucking stupid.

Can you tell my sex ed teacher that please?

Posting dicks and forcing kids to stare at them for an hour. Talking about sticking dicks in ears...

Sounds like your teacher is doing some real life trolling.

I'm really curious if this is like, some 40 year old man just trying to get his rocks off, or an older women who legitimately thinks this way.

A woman who looks to be around 25-30.

We're men, what do you expect?

Any guy who could stick his dick in someone's ear either must have a severe genetic defect of the width of his dick or his partner suffered a wound to the side of the head large enough to shove a dick in it in the first place.

You'd have better luck going through the eye socket.

Or he's got a razor-bladed dick, which parts the flesh and bone. 

The mouth...I could get.  The V, I could get.  Even the A, I could get.

The ear...I mean...really, the EAR?  I mean, I suppose I've stumbled across people who had an ear thing, but the ear canal?!

WHAT KIND OF SICK HENTAI SHIT HAS SHE BEEN READING WTF

Your sex ed teacher was a pervert then, lol.

I should probably joke more often. This was semi-truthful and the rest of it was just nonsense.

What's true is that I'd rather have my own children of my descent than anyone else. Also, I've always heard people saying that they don't want kids, but usually the opinion changes as they grow and mature up.

Huh. Well, I don't want kids, ESPECIALLY not of my own descent. Culling this genetic line, thanks. >_<

To be fair, I don't think your bedroom equation could result in a child.

Bullshit.

Yes, of course, because when lesbians have sex, they totally use special medical procedures that turn their skin cells into sperm and ejaculate it into their partners, no matter how inconvenient, implausible, or ridiculous that is.

I'd rather not perpetuate mine either.  I can't stop my siblings from procreating, but I'll not be a party to it, nor will I babysit for 'em.  xD

Do you hate overpopulation too, or do you just really, really hate your ancestors?

I can't answer for Morgan, but I'd like to go one day without being reminded that we're overcrowded.  And I don't like my parents.

Well, then obviously the best option would be to not adopt and let those orphans starve to death and/or become criminals, in order to cull other criminals and/or make brand new orphans.

Orphans...  Isn't that what society is producing now?  I was a latchkey kid (synonymous), the only one I knew in fact, growing up.  But now it's rare for someone not to be.

These days orphans (Or at least kids given up for adoption) are a dime a dozen, even in first world countries.

Especially in first world countries, since this generation loves screwing but hates responsibility. I assume the massive, poorly birth-controlled population of the stereotypical African village probably has more biological parents trying to care for them than the nastier hoods of New York.

I agree whole-heartedly.  The desire to have children outweighs their common sense.  I view it as a mental disability, but only in the end will we really know for sure.  (And the end will be here sooner than they think.)

I've got nothing against my ancestors. I just wouldn't want to roll these particular genetic dice, and risk having a child with a more severe mental illness than my own.

And no, that's not a joke.

I haven't really wanted to talk about this here, but... I'm on three anti-depressants, and count myself lucky that I've found something that works for me. As for my immediate family, well, my parents are okay... but my sister, at the age of 18, developed what was either schizophrenia, or severe depression with schizophrenia-like symptoms. She made an incredible recovery (which is the ONLY thing to suggest that it wasn't schizophrenia, she was otherwise a textbook case), but still struggles with depression and anxiety.

Pretty sure neither of us are going to risk having kids. :P

In my own family, there is a dominant cochlear nerve deformity and a persistent trait (probably more environmental than anything else) that causes them to have severe psychotic episodes (especially when it comes to children).  I'd never risk unleashing that beast on an innocent, even indirectly.

...damn.

Well, I commend your decision.

And I yours.

Not to mention the risk factor of having a child with autism goes way up for men in their forties (S-c-i-e-n-c-e, my best excuse yet!)  ; )

Addendum:  Just to clarify my previous post, the children are not the psycho's - it's the parents that are the abusers.

:( Hope everything stays okay for you and your sister

I once believed that I would eventually succumb to my baser urges, but the older one get the easier it gets.

I had sex ed in 5th grade, but luckily I had in school suspension that day and missed it. Yay!

Anyway, I draw penises on walls everyday, so really a penis in no big deal for me. That, and I have one.

First time I read that, I missed the 'ed' after sex.

XD I'm positive I wouldn't have sex in the fifth grade. Hell, I wouldn't even be able to have sex now, all the girls think I'm an idiot!

Who said anything about you having sex with girls? There are other options.

Like animals and men?

I'll think about that...

What's so hard to get? All you do is stick it in her and pee.

I applaud TacocaT's decision not to wind up like this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5zkCnHUnoYY

I watched that without sound.... Interesting, to say the least.

I didn't have to do all that in 5th grade because I have some "desease" where I pass out easily at something gross, horrifying, or weird. Maybe the docter lied about me being perfectly normal...

But you are in fifth grade...

Nope, sixth. It was last year.

Why do they do it every grade? That's freaking dumb.

They don't here in Arizona. I am pardoned of the penises.

They didn't in Utah, either.

All my problems started when I moved east.

That's why you must live in the west.

Exactly, the west is better than the east.

The West has nothing but stoners and thugs.

YOU LIE!

Besides, you're in Korea, how do you know?

I lived in Minnesota for ten years.

So... You lied about living in Korea.

Y U LIE # @SPARTACUSTHEGREAT ?

I'm living in Korea now.

Oh. Why would you move from wonderful America to that shit stain known as Korea?

Also, my great-grandfather probably killed some of the ancestors of your friends (He was in the Korean war).

South Korea, dumbass.

Eh, fuck you. Korea is a shit stain if it's North or South.

Fuck you, motherfucker. Don't talk shit about my country in front of me.

You're from 'Murica. Your allegiance belongs to us.

I'm a South Korean citizen.

Your allegiance still belongs to us.

How?

Umm..... # @SpartacustheGreat .

# @Chrisisamoron

Ha, that didn't tag me.

Chris is a moron.

# @SpartacustheGreat is a c-c-choker,

In front of me he said...

But on the internet he was...

Whaaaaaa?

South Korea was still involved, wasn't it? I'm not good on history, but I'm good in science.

COKE BOTTLE ROCKETS!!!

You wouldn't happen to be one of those, Queermosexuals now would ya?

My great-grandfather was married (To a woman) and had 3 kids.

I'm positive he's not a Queermosexual.

I've learned 3 4 new words from this thread.

Lol. If that's new to you, you probably shouldn't be on the internet...

It's a free country...

Which is why I said "probably". I meant that you probably weren't mature enough to be on the internet if you learned three to four new words on this thread.

Three to four? How do you only learn 3.5 words? Come across a word in braille you've never seen before and then get your hands chopped off halfway through reading it?

Man, what a living Hell that would be.

I'll have you know that I am very mature. *takes ice cream and shoves it into my ear* See? Totally mature.

Pretty sure he moved to Korea afterwards

Like me

And skiers. I'm that too.

The Appalachians aren't cold enough for my soul!

Exactly! The West is better than the East.

Are you stupid?

Maybe if you grew some balls and paid some attention to those classes, perhaps you'd know why -_-

I have a long term memory. Once I hear something once, I never have to hear it again (Which is one reason that I shudder at exactly 12:48 pm on Saturdays.)

I think the condition you're suffering from is also known as: Lying

Thank you, docter playa, can I have my lollipop now?

NOT UNTIL YOU'RE DONE WITH YOUR SEX EDUCATION!

That reminds me of that "Sprinkles are for winners" commercial from Progressive.

SPRINKLES ARE FOR PEOPLE WHO FINISH THEIR SEX EDUCATION!

Am I done yet?

No. You must stare at a dick for an hour and label its features.

Eh, sprinkles are dead to me anyway.

Did it include the foreskin (haha)?

AND THEN ONCE YOU ARE DONE WITH THAT, YOU MAY EAT YOUR SPRINKLES, BUT ONLY THEN!

*Little kid voice* Can I have my sprinkles?

That depends, are you ready to stare at a dick for an hour?

*Intense stare*

Yes.

NO BECAUSE YOU- well,okay. I'm feeling nice today. *Throws sprinkles into his hair*

AH, FUCK! GET 'EM OUT! THE DOCTOR SAID NO MORE THINGS IN MY HAIR OR I GET AIDS!

*shrugs* Oh well, that's your problem. *walks away licking the ice cream coming out of my ear*

Be grateful! I just gave you free sprinkles!

Ignorance isn't a good thing. 

Oh well, hopefully they don't do it in sixth... Or ever again... I ran out of excuses.

You don't even really need sex ed with shows like Jersey Shore on television

Wait, that actually means you need it more.

Never had a whole class devoted to it. Most we learned about it was a one week course in health in 8th grade, and then another 2 week course in health as sophomores... and I took health 3 times... 

It wasn't a class completely devoted to the topic of sex education, solely on it's own. Instead, as seems to be common, it was a small (maybe a week, at most) section dedicated to it, which itself was integrated? into a Health class.  The "education" really was just an advocation of abstinence (which I thought was dumb, and I still do). Of course, this being in Texas, it shouldn't surprise anyway.

I blame schools for educating us about something we could always Google! This is more evidence that schools are the enemy!

The media is the enemy, and MTV is their puppet.

I agree. We need to declare war! I'm going to need a canon, a spoon, and a very fluffy llama.

Just to let everyone know you guys are lucky