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Gay Weapons

5 years ago

One of you didn't link to this already? Oh well here it is:

https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/foxflightstudios/the-orientation-and-gender-armory-pride-weapon-ena

Now ignoring the fact that CoGites love this, thus proving how retarded it is, the sword lesbian one is the worst of the bunch.

Sword Lesbian doesn't have the nice alliteration or even the rhyming scheme they were trying to go for with these. They could have at least did Lance Lesbian or better yet, Longbow Lesbian.

I would expect swords to be reserved for "boring" straight people considering swords are pretty much considered to be the common medieval rank and file shown in most media.

Sabley complained that Bi Battleaxe is hilariously insulting, since Battleaxe is typically used a reference for ugly old women.

I guess they could have used boomerang which would have had a better double meaning or even bullwhip for the kinky crowd.

Alliteration!

5 years ago
Leslie the Longbow Lesbian laments loathsome limericks while lambasting lesser lesbian lovers.

Gay Weapons

5 years ago

Muh representayshun.

But thankfully, cannon is still cis het. Imagine fucking rainbow artillery pieces, that would be true heresy.

 

Gay Weapons

5 years ago

But the battleaxe is so pretty! I'd totally munch on a few minges to get my hands on it. ^_^

Gay Weapons

5 years ago

Lesbian Lance is the best, because of how insanely phallic a lance is.

Bi Battleaxe is good, because battle-axe's are doubled bladed so they can hit both ways, like a bisxeual.

Straight Sword is fine, I guess.

Ace Mace is good because maces, like life as an asexual, have no point. 

Furry Flail and Incel Noose were other nice ones.

Bullwhip bestialist, because they could actually use their weapon as part of their fun.C

Celibate Castle, because they don't get to take part in the fighting and instead stay in their castles, alone, trying.

Gay Weapons

5 years ago
Straight Submachine Gun. It's not covered in flowers, it just fires bullets at anyone dumb enough to challenge the holder with a stylized medieval weapon.

Gay Weapons

5 years ago

Homophobic Assault Rifle. Always present with rebel lords when the LGBT court convenes.

Gay Weapons

5 years ago
Lol sexual pleasure is the only point in your life? That's so depressing. I dunno why but when "Ace Mace" was mentioned the first thought I had was the pepper spray. Which is strange since in general I spend a lot more time thinking about melee weapons than pepper spray brands.

Gay Weapons

5 years ago

Human culture is based on sexuality, given its the one need that we in the first world can't necessarily satisfy whenever we want, as opposed to say hunger. Thus, for the aces, you will never enjoy the true joys of a relationship, society and life in general, so no oreal point.

Gay Weapons

5 years ago
The only way to interact with other humans is by having sex with them. Okay.

....that implies some really interesting things about your family though. Things that the COG Discord would strongly disapprove of.

Gay Weapons

5 years ago

Not what I said. I said human culture is based on sexuality. Look at the world, and its pretty clear that sexuality has infiltrated pretty much all of it. Unless you meant the relationship part, in which case, I meant romantic relationships.

Gay Weapons

5 years ago
You know, I'll leave you and Leora on your own since I think that's what you were aiming for anyway rather than continue this 'argument' where you ignore the major part of the post you made just above this one that anyone can read and you're unable to edit.

Gay Weapons

5 years ago

I didn't ignore anything, though, so...

Gay Weapons

5 years ago
Why the hell is there an iron pan?

Gay Weapons

5 years ago

It's a pun about Pansexuals.

Gay Weapons

5 years ago
I'm aware of why they added it. But it doesn't even really fit in with the whole "historic weapons" theme, they had going on (I mean, who the hell wants to have a frying pan when your lesbian friends get swords and your queer friends get Spears). Seems like the pansexuals get the short end of the stick.

Could've done better
0/10 on the gay scale

Gay Weapons

5 years ago

What are you talking about? Frying pans are bloody lethal!

https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/FryingPanOfDoom

Gay Weapons

5 years ago
$80,000 is a lifechanging amount of money for most people and given she asked for $1600 I'm pretty sure just about any sane person would take the money and run.

Gay Weapons

5 years ago
Yea, any *COUGH* sane man, would've just taken the money and ran.

Gay Weapons

5 years ago

Why? This woman has just found out people are willing to spend insane amounts of money on this. Screw fucking 80,000 cuid and back to your shitty job, this is a business that could set you up for life. 

Gay Weapons

5 years ago

Shouldn't the gay and lesbian swords be curved?

Gay Weapons

5 years ago

  I don't really have a big problem with it cos the designs look all shiny and detailed but jeez! Names don't really roll off the tongue, do they! I guess this kind of thing is to be expected because (at least nowadays) dnd is for the gays. DND is for dicks and dudes, you right wing capitalistic crack smoking red necked mtn.dewyouevenknowbro kentucky fried republicanyounots.

  I can only assume sword lesbian is a tumblr thingy, I think? Like revolutionary girl utena. That's super gay and super sword and super cool and super incestuous and super shiny and super herman hesse also for some reason.

I wouldn't wear any of these pins. I'd much rather play video games, or maybe some icecream, which I could do while playing video games.

 

Gay Weapons

5 years ago
@Digit there's an anime thing on the floor here in Aisle 3 and I'm afraid to touch it

Gay Weapons

5 years ago

it's like what if you were watching sailor moon and it was actually evangelion and somebody put acid in your mtn dew

A weird amount of Herman Hesse references. Like, if you're read Demian or some of Steppanwolf, it's eerily similar.