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hi! im new and got introduced to this site via jenna and julien (mom n pop otts) can't wait to start writing stuff that i create in my own mind and i swear i have better grammar when i actually write :P 

Welcome, and I look forward to your story. And yeah, hopefully your grammar is better for a story than just messaging. Good luck ^_^

If your grammar is better when you write, then I suggest just using that better grammar when posting on the forum as well. This is a writing site, it's not that hard to capitalize words and write them correctly. Welcome to CYS, good luck with your story. I suggest reading some featured stories first, to get an idea of what we like here. Pleas don't rush your story and put actual effort in it, bad shit gets unpublished.

The story description looks fine anyway. But hello OP and yes as May has kindly pointed out we do tend to really encourage people to post coherently on the forum, it's a writing site so we have higher standards about that kind of thing than a lot of other places.

Anyway, I adore TLA so I'd be interested in seeing your take on the same basic concept. Be sure to drop by the Writing Workshop if you need feedback or advice.

Got it, sorry about that! I am not known for those wowing first impressions, but I will for sure get myself familiar with more featured stories and not publish anything bad, hopefully. 

Welcome to the site!

Good luck~

:) Hi! Welcome! If you have the time, you can also check out awesome stories/games on this site for inspiration. If you would like, I will use copy and paste to recommend to you what I recommend to others:

I especially recommend the works by BerkaZerka, Ogre11, and EbonVasilis. So far I have only been able to read some of each of their impressive works in the limited time I am here. I suspect all their works are awesome!

BerkaZerka’s Dead Man Walking (Zombie Survival) is extremely well written [I managed to get the best possible ending!] and kept my eyes glued to the phone I use (though it does have violence/gore and some language), he has also got great puzzles and games (Some of which I have still not completed. They’re awesome!). Ogre11’s awesome works I have read/played so far include: Spy Mission (You gotta see the different endings), Cryogenic Failure (Again, you gotta see the different endings), UFO at School, Alien Abduction, Finding the Muse (this will definitely help aspiring writers). Of EbonVasilis’s works, so far I have read his epic A Chosen Hero (I’ve got to read more of his works!). I have also played DavidG’s The Tower of Rowena, played Zephyrme2847’s & mudshadow63’s [and they, amazingly, were only 11 and 4 when they created this!] Kittens of FAT, played cMitchell3’s Get out Alive, read Will11’s true story Climbing Beyond The Clouds, read MinnieKing’s inspirational message Addition, and read the short mouse hero story by pinkalily21, Alone in the Forest. There are great writers and future great writers to be found on this site.

I wish you well on your story, and I hope you have an awesome time on the site!