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We need to talk about Chris

6 years ago

Just yesterday I was reading the CYS forums and I came upon an interesting discovery.

Chris was making the unique claim that he didn’t duel, but that couldn’t be right, I mean everyone duels. So I checked it out.

Ok so just one lie. What does that matter? Chris couldn’t possibly not be who he says he is, I mean, Chris is a contributing member of our community. Right?

Wrong. Chris has no stories, and barely any points for someone who has been around as long as he has. So what exactly does Chris do here?

Oh no Chris. This has to have been ironic right? What other reason would Chris have for linking to an alt-right website? Chris has never shown any desire to make an ethnostate. And CYS is open minded, we don’t just randomly get rid of significantly large portions of our populations.

Ok, except for the warrior cats. But now that I think about it, Chris did have a large part in banning the battle pussies. He brigaded hard as anyone, save for Malk. Wait, why do I keep calling him Chris. It’s almost like he chose a memorable and common name to distract us from the numbers at the end and stay hidden in the shadows, unnoticed so no one would look deeply into his web of lies.

Wow, chris is a very common name, but that doesn’t prove anything. But 113022 has no meaning. Right?

What do these numbers add up to? 54. That’s means nothing. Only what other numbers do we know that relate to Chris?

Of course. November 3rd. As most of you know by now, I am Jewish. And despite what you might think, there is one bad thing that has happened to the Jews. One very bad thing.

Again with the expulsion of populations? There must be a pattern here. And 54, that has to fit in somehow. Then I remembered. There is one right wing politician born in 1954 that wants to expel large populations from his country that I can think of.

Oh, well that’s fine. There are no large minorities in Turkey to expel right?

Well except for the Kurds, but Erdogan isn’t trying to expel them. At least not yet. But he has started to take actions in this direction.

Ah yes. Convince America convince the world. At least that’s what Erdogan wants. And as it turns out so does “Chris”. You see, the majority of CYS is American. Chris is one of many Turkish moles sent to infiltrate western culture and make us used to the idea of alt right politics and expulsion of populations within the borders of our countries. The first stage of this plan already succeeded. Trump was elected president thanks to internet armies that spread memes of hate and bigotry. The obvious next step is to send people like Chris. Make us compliant when Erdogan forces the Kurds out of Turkey to create an ethnostate. We cannot let this happen.

Tl;dr, Chris is a turkish plant that is responsible for Trump’s election and is also attempting to make us accept extreme right wing policies that will soon be implemented in Turkey.

We need to talk about Chris

6 years ago
If you were this infatuated and desperate for Chris to notice you, you could have just sent him a picture of your dick.

We need to talk about Chris

6 years ago

Assuming my gender in 2017 wow.

We need to talk about Chris

6 years ago
Uh excuse me, there was a whole thread where you came out as a gay, not a lesbian, before falling back on the old 'someone in my account' excuse and backpedaling.

Perhaps it is your own web of lies that needs to be examined, hmm?

We need to talk about Chris

6 years ago

Assuming there are only 2 genders in 2017.

We need to talk about Chris

6 years ago
Penguins also can't be pineapples, sorry to upset you with these inconvenient biological facts.

We need to talk about Chris

6 years ago

It's actually called fashion, you probably wouldn't have heard of it. 

We need to talk about Chris

6 years ago

Dicks are irrelevant to gender you shitlord

We need to talk about Chris

6 years ago
And penguin avatars aren't. Everyone with a penguin avatar is male. There are statistics to prove it, right here on this site.

We need to talk about Chris

6 years ago

Berka's wife has a penguin avatar on BHB IIRC.

We need to talk about Chris

6 years ago
Assuming Berka's wife is a woman in 2017

We need to talk about Chris

6 years ago

Stop trying to distract from the original post. You're obviously Chris' alt. I should have seen it in the identical style of writing.

We need to talk about Chris

6 years ago

But Chris dosen't write anything.

We need to talk about Chris

6 years ago

Nether does Mizal

We need to talk about Chris

6 years ago

She writes some stuff. WWP short stories (before Seto become so darn busy), and a storygame. More than Chris.

We need to talk about Chris

6 years ago

I mean obviously Chris doesn't have any time for writing on his main account if he does it all on his alt's.

We need to talk about Chris

6 years ago
It's true we both don't finish stories in the exact same way, but you've got it backwards; Chris is my alt.

As are most of the rest of the posters who joined in the last five years.

You've not yet scratched the surface of what chronic, untreated boredom can drive one to, but, I'll take the creation of this thread as a good start.

We need to talk about Chris

6 years ago

No.

No, no, no.

I trusted you. I opened my heart.

Is nothing sacred anymore?!

AM I YOUR ALT?!?!

:'(

We need to talk about Chris

6 years ago

This site consist mostly just of your and Ford's alts talking to each other, doesn't it?

We need to talk about Chris

6 years ago

Ford VS Mizal: Alt War. Coming never soon to theaters near you.

I guess so, so everyone must pick a side or else they'll be classified as rebels and be executed

We need to talk about Chris

6 years ago

EVEN ME!? OH MY GOD! THE DARK SECRETS I'VE NEVER KNOWN!

We need to talk about Chris

6 years ago

Not only were you wrong about the Turkish spy thing, you're way off on that.

We need to talk about Chris

6 years ago

I saw that edit.

We need to talk about Chris

6 years ago

Fascinating. 

We need to talk about Chris

6 years ago

See everyone, this is what happens when boredom reaches the "unhealthy," level.

We need to talk about Chris

6 years ago
when fording you need to add more sprinkles of randomness and lies. decent attempt though.

We need to talk about Chris

6 years ago

But I have pictures.

We need to talk about Chris

6 years ago

Lol, this is hilarious. Maybe you should go make a storygame about Chris now.

We need to talk about Chris

6 years ago

I had no idea. How can this be?

Is anything real anymore?

Am I even real?

...

Fuck,  I dunno, maybe.

We need to talk about Chris

6 years ago

Tim, don't even think about having another existential crisis.

We need to talk about Chris

6 years ago

Wait, when else did I have one?

We need to talk about Chris

6 years ago

Well you've had two in this very thread in the last ten minutes :P

We need to talk about Chris

6 years ago

Haha, this isn't true in any way, shape, or form.

We need to talk about Chris

6 years ago

The evidence is right there!

We need to talk about Chris

6 years ago

What are you going on about, Beta?

We need to talk about Chris

6 years ago
He said it was all true but then he edited it to this, I saw him.

We need to talk about Chris

6 years ago

How many genders do you see Picard?

We need to talk about Chris

6 years ago

Pfft, no I didn't.

We need to talk about Chris

6 years ago

Why would you bother to deny something so asinine? Unless it was actually true.

We need to talk about Chris

6 years ago

Exactly! Good to know there are some other free thinkers left on this site.

We need to talk about Chris

6 years ago

I thought that this would be another one of those illuminati confirmed posts that used to be very popular.

We need to talk about Chris

6 years ago

Are you implying that this is a joke?

We need to talk about Chris

6 years ago

I'm not implying anything...