I like how you tagged teams together.
Ow, Jesus Christ, I'm thousands of miles away conversing over a computer, and the superlative aggressiveness in that still hurts me.
The Fallen Grave, a story about a young girl bullied to death and she tries to get revenge on the people who ticked her off.
And that's not even the real, full story.
The basics of the story as to not spoil anything: The main character is being hunted - you - and needs to protect himself and his family from someone in his parents' past. They are out to kill all you love. Good luck and Don't Forget.
Our story's about a guy in a bar.
That's for we to know, and you to find out.
A young, third-generation human is faced with the basic task of survival after the mysterious fog that protects his village vanishes, allowing the gods' first creations, monsters, to invade. Guided only by his will to survive, his friends and family, and a vision of a mysterious spear wielded by a goddess, he must discover the true reason for why the deities have forsaken his species.
Gran: A young, impressionable seventeen-year old boy. He works the farms to help support his baker mother and retired grandmother while occasionally going to visit his childhood friend and crush, Liliana. Despite being physically average and terrified of fighting, he's one of the smartest men in the village and one of the few survivors of the massacre that occurs after the fog vanishes. Throughout his journey, he's plagued by visions of a goddess, a glowing spear, and color.
Liliana: The local blacksmith's daughter, Liliana is a skilled fighter who takes great passion in following her father's footsteps. She first met Gran after breaking his nose. Depending on your choices and route, she can end up as a romance option. I just realized I never described how she looks. Esh and I should probably do that. I did describe her father though, so at least people can guess she shares the orange hair color her father has. Which she does.
Siga: The local blacksmith. Siga wears a blacksmith apron... and nothing else. Whether it's forging a weapon, threatening Gran with a number of gruesome deaths if he goes anywhere near his daughter, or running for village leader, Siga is mad scary and probably one of the few villages who can take on a monster in open combat.
Gran's Unnamed Mother Whom I Need to Name: Gran's mother. She bakes things and is famous for her darinberry pie. Since color doesn't really exist, all her pies are stark grey. Even the filling. Even the crust.
Gram-Grams/Gran's Unnamed Grandmother Whom I Need to Name: She's a first generation human who loves to tell Gran stories about the first generation, and how there once was no fog.
Chapter 1 is almost entirely done! Woo! It'll be around thirty pages or so but boy is it interesting to read! I was kind of reluctant about Esh for a while there but he's pulling his weight quite nicely.
Bucky, who's story synopsis sounds coolest so far?
The annoyance is very frustrating.....
w-what's so funny?
I wonder why. Sentinel, why are you discriminating this young lad?
What is with you and calling me male? Lass. Not lad.
Oh, bless him, Mason. She's happy the way she is! Leave her be! The less she improves or changes, the more we win.
I... I'm really confused. Do you not like my story synopsis? What's wrong with it?
A good plot summary that stays to the point but gives just enough details to whet the reader's appetite is hard to write. @Axiom, do you care to share your wisdom on this with the children?
Also, I'd like to summon @EndMaster, to place his divine protection over this thread and rain fierce punishments from above on any derailers or shitposters. Someone always has to wind up destroying Bucky's threads, and even though I'm not currently able to commit to this, I'm following with interest and would really, just once, like the site to have a nice thing that doesn't end in a shameful spectacle of retardation.
edit: And I see it's already beginning... :|
A good synopsis has the following things:
- The main conflict of the story, which is what the story is about. This is different from the premise. It's not "a story about someone in a haunted house," it's "a story about someone who's being stalked through a haunted house by a ghost and must banish it in order to survive."
- The protagonist. Who is this person and why should we care about them? What do they need to learn emotionally from the story? You should identify their main character conflict if possible.
- Stakes. What happens if the protagonist fails? If it doesn't sound interesting, you need to increase the stakes.
- Irony is a nice bonus. If your premise sounds unexpected somehow, your story will be more interesting. Something like, I dunno, a priest having to go to a brothel. If your synopsis doesn't have any irony, your story probably doesn't have any, which could be something to add.
All stories should be about rain on a wedding day, and the good advice that they just didn't take. Duly noted.
By Sentinel and MasonJar
You're a guy in a bar.
This is directed toward everyone but I tagged Esh in specific because I want him to participate more in this thread.
Which is scarier? Spending a night in an abandoned cave, or spending a night in a dark forest?
Why don't you PM him?
Because the question was directed toward everyone, not just him.
......this is not the thread for that. Didn't Mizal talk about not derailing it?
"While I hope each team works together to solve the vast majority of their questions and problems, if both team members are stumped or desperately desire outside input on something of great import, this would probably be a good place to ask for additional opinions. " - Bucky
so ya, dis da thread.
So the question "is a cave or dark forest scarier" a very important question that has a great effect on this thread? I think not.
... it's great importance to the plot of the story.
Wait, are you asking people what the setting of your story should be? Correct me if I'm mistaken.
Kind of. A major chapter of the story takes place in either a dark forest, or a cavern system. I'm trying to decide which one is scarier, because a large chunk of the game will take place in this environment.
Both are pretty standard settings. Like any situation, it depends on how the scene is written. The fact you're leaving it to others to decide implies the cave or forest are both more or less window dressing that don't significantly effect how the plot plays out.
If you're really undecided, why not make taking either path an option for the player?
I'm surprised I didn't think of that.
And the reason I didn't just make yet another writing workshop thread is because I've already made like three, and Bucky said:
"We probably don't need 10+ motivational threads clogging up the Writing Workshop and burying threads from non-contest site members. So let's try and stay confined to this thread out of respect to others. "
Some caves are massive things you could get lost in till you starve in darkness so complete you can't see your hand in front of your face. They're easy to become disoriented in and there are sudden drop offs, eerie echoes, deep water with weird eyeless fish...
If just spending the night in a small one, yeah that's not too scary on it's own, but a good writer can make any place fit a horror story.
^ A good Horror Writer can make Rural Maine, party balloons, and fucking corn-tentacles fit a horror story.
Leave me! I'm going through a sixth life crisis!
I dunno... I mean I get pretty scared when things get generally dark, but I would feel more...protected from the elements... in a cave.
Makes sense, despite my very small fear of the dark, and my extreme fear of heights.
Oooh, that sounds incredibly generic and that just makes me terrified of what you two have concocted up. The specifics are probably terrifying.
It Tastes Like Chicken
by Chris113022 and Digit.
A group of friends take a road trip, only for their car to break down. After searching for help, they come across a house and a seemingly normal family... Of cannibals, that is. A comedy horror full of references, deconstructions, and parodies.
Oh god this scene I wrote is... disgusting:
The balded, vaguely man-like beast snaps Grams' spine and tears it out with nothing but its teeth. Thankfully, your grandmother is long dead already.
Then, the beast turns its attention to you. One limb swings toward you but hits a chair instead, splitting it in two. Another limb flails into the wall, hooking into it and allowing the abomination to pull itself upright. Grams' corpse drops to the ground, a barely recognizable mass of flesh.
The beast shows no mercy, leaping toward you. In a last ditch effort to survive, you draw your dagger and plunge it upwards. It impales the creature and allows you to force it back, but the beast recomposes itself just after and makes another lunge.
Its jaws expand even further from the dangling strands of sinew and collide with your head. You try to scream, but the beast swallows your skull into its throat. All that can be heard are muffled cries.
The beast takes another gulp, and the upper half of your torso slips into the slimy interior of its mouth. Gulp. Your elbows. Gulp. Your entire upper half. Gulp. Your pelvis. At this point the beast needs to dislocate no further, and instead lifts its mouth into the air. The rest of your body slides down the well-lubricated throat of the creature and into its stomach.
You're alive the entire time. It feels like hours pass of you suffocating in its stomach, surviving only by the small amount of air you get anytime the creature breaths.
Gulp. A light shines from above but then darkens again. In that short glimpse of illumination... you see the head of a man, crying for help.
Whoops. See below.
Why do people keep responding to my posts with blank replies and/or just a period?
Well, the other one was an editlock.
Tim's was an accident that needs mod cleanup :P
He didn't mean to reply to yours I think.
Also some are stuff with hidden text.
Like the one below xD
Boo. This is hidden text.
U kno it bb
Hidden text ftw
We should stop now xD
Mine are more hidden than yours
Yours might be more hidden >.> But mine are still kind of hidden. It's good enough for me.
It was a mistake. I'm sorry.
Me and IP want to keep ours secret...however, I want to ask one question:
Would drawing pictures for the important/all the scenes be a good addition or would it just be something that takes a lot of time and doesn't really provide much?
Pictures can help compensate for poor descriptive skills.
>.> Wow. I see how it is. Are you saying I have poor descriptive skills? XD
Fite me irl
I just feel like a picture of this would be good.
The scent of the air in this place is a mix of paint and polish, bits of old clay and dusty canvas. The floors and ceilings are pristine, clean white, but the walls and trappings are a complete riot of color. I love this museum. As much as I protest when my parents drag me here like a child who can't be left on her own, I can't help being drawn to the pictures, the sculptures, the evidence of artistic passion.
U kno it bb
U got it bb
I do not care if you draw it or not, it just matters if you want it sooner or later.
Time and place? Also, are futuristic weapons allowed or are we fighting fairly?
I guess I want to put some effort into this, and I think I can finish the writing in time...Hm...I will try and finish the story first, then draw some scenes if I have time left c:
December 16th, 1991
Okay then. I will be waiting. You need a ride or do you have your own time machine? :P
Ok. I think it's a good plan xD
A NEW ANTAGONIST APPROACHES!!!
The Wailing Monster
A mysterious creature that appears at key locations throughout the game. It watches Gran from afar, before leaping thousands of feet into the sky.
Woo! We finally got a main antagonist!
That's pretty cool... I guess.
Teamwork makes the dream work!