Player Comments on 4 Little Mice


Four Little Mice was one of the stories I remember enjoying when I first found CYS years ago. So I decided to read it again to see how it held up through time and to get it rated by me.
To start off, I am not sure why it is noted in blue on the first page that important choices are blue and ought not be missed. The reader has to make a choice or click whatever non-choice link is provided to go on to the next page. It seriously brought me out of the story to have sudden, blue IMPORTANT CHOICE notices. I can read what the choices are without them being noted that they are blue and important. Don’t worry. I won’t miss them. I managed to reach this story; I think I can manage to figure out that I need to click a link.

The story itself was quite charming. The poem style it was written in reminded me of a children’s book, which was a good decision on the part of the author, considering that most animal stories not meant for children are for degenerates. It was quite confusing for the older brother mouse to be named Pa. I am guessing there is some meaning behind the mice’s names, but it never felt right to me reading the other mice referred to as Pa’s siblings.
I was sad when Paul the Exterminator died. He was a hero who did not deserve that. I only hope that someone else took up his mantle in the war against the thieving rodent pests.

As for the story structure, there were a lot of delayed effects, which some people really like, but it was a little tedious for me to have to read the same pages a dozen times in order to find all the endings. There is also a bit where Ru is said to be meeting up with Li and Mo in a path where they never were separated from one another, which is confusing. If you freak who reads comments before you read stories are into delayed branching, this one’s for you, baby.

It is always nice to see a story on here that is both kid-friendly and entertaining. While subsequent playthroughs grew increasingly boring, the first few were very fun for me. I’d recommend just replaying until you end up with all the mice alive (or dead, if that’s your goal) and quitting there until another time.

RIP Paul
-- Cricket on 6/1/2019 10:40:15 PM with a score of 2
"4 Little Mice" was an adorable, warm game that immediately captured my heart and attention. Written in a poem format, it sounded similar to a children's story and reminded me of the popular nursery rhyme "Three Blind Mice", only this story had a modern, slightly macabre twist. The game offered a variety of different scenes and endings that were all fun to discover, and I admit that I purposely chose the paths that would kill the mice, just so I could see what inventive deaths that were laid out for them. The cast of characters were all endearing, each having their own unique abilities and personalities that made them stand out. It saddened each time I failed to save a mouse, which pushed me to replay the game so that I could help the entire family escape. It was surprising that giving the needle to the foolish mouse would save one of the siblings, and it warmed my heart to see that the mouse who appeared "useless" turned out to be a hero.

Overall, "4 Little Mice" successfully grabbed my interest with its endearing story and multiple endings, and it left me smiling at the end. It definitely wouldn't be an appropriate game for younger kids, despite the cheerful tone the narrator adapted throughout the story (which somehow made the death scenes even scarier). I'm glad that I chose to play this game and would definitely recommend it for those who love cute stories and adorable mice.
-- SummerSparrow on 4/11/2016 4:27:21 PM with a score of 4
-- Blem on 2/14/2020 10:23:02 AM with a score of 4
i really was not emotionally prepared for the death of my mice. i think the weight of their furry lifeless bodies will forever weigh down on my conscience.
-- flo on 1/24/2020 7:29:59 AM with a score of 2
Well, this was an extremely heartwarming story. It was very interactive, and figuring out how to solve all four mice was a fun little puzzle. Initially, some choices that you thought were right (for they might save one mouse's life) may turn out to be the wrong ones, for they force another mouse to die. In my first playthrough, only two of the mice survived, but I managed to keep all three alive by the third.

Your use of items and the butterfly effect was clever. I especially liked how you wrote important choices in blue. It was also really fun to be able to play from the perspective of all four characters. The bond between the family members was obvious, and I really did care for the characters. This prompted me to seek the true end of your game. Good job at evoking emotion in the reader, like this.

The rhyming scheme of your game was good. I know it can be difficult to write longer pieces -- especially interactive ones! -- in this sort of format. Although this would be a difficult goal, my one recommendation for improvement would be that you had some sort of syllable pattern that you were consistent with. E.g. Line 1 has X syllables, Line 2 has Y, and then Line 3 has X and Line 4 has Y, again. This would've helped the poem to flow, better. I also saw a few instances where the words on adjacent lines didn't really seem to rhyme, perfectly. I understand how difficult this can be, however, when you have poems spanning over 12,000 words.

Tl;dr : This is a short, heartwarming story about saving a family of four mice. It is interactive, clever, and overall just a well-done piece of fiction. Good work.
-- Reader82 on 1/16/2020 9:21:13 PM with a score of 4
I got the Pa ending, noice.
-- D~O~U~B~T on 12/24/2019 12:54:49 PM with a score of 1
-- ArtsyGirl38 on 11/14/2019 9:56:47 AM with a score of 0
Its pretty good, for a poem, i was not a huge fan of the style
-- Nerd26 on 10/21/2019 9:58:49 AM with a score of 2
it was a awesome story
-- sylvieallain19 on 9/24/2019 2:31:34 PM with a score of 2
It is bad to be a story game in which the object is to lose, and not to win.
-- Edwardfmcshane on 6/12/2019 11:53:59 AM with a score of 2
Okay, I actually quite enjoyed this. 6/8.
-- 325boy on 6/7/2019 3:48:36 PM with a score of 2
Also some of the rhymes were bad
-- Person on 4/13/2019 11:38:00 AM with a score of 2
I really liked it! The story was interesting and it made me feel the ways of fighting with friends. It was a bit saddening, but I really appreciate it!
-- StoryTurtle on 2/17/2019 9:12:33 AM with a score of 1
Okay, Now this is epic :)
-- Paul on 2/1/2019 6:17:04 AM with a score of 0
Not everyone can pull off storytelling through poetry. I loved the grim tone that was combined with a sort of dissonant childlike cheeriness (that made the deaths horrible. Sad, horrible, but very well-done).
-- CicadaFiske on 1/10/2019 1:24:56 AM with a score of 0
Certainly very unique compared to other CYOA. Only wish the outcome of certain decisions seemed less random. Very likable characters and well written poetry.
-- TheGrandNarrator on 11/30/2018 6:23:49 PM with a score of 2
I got mad at myself so many times but this story is great, it's very well written.
-- _antisocial_lilypad_ on 11/26/2018 6:33:02 PM with a score of 2
Charming and an absolute joy to play. I ended up with all 4 mice surviving which was slightly strange as the original poem had all mice dying. But still fun and worth your time.
-- Szymon on 11/9/2018 3:12:22 PM with a score of 1
I actually really enjoyed this story. This is admittedly my first choose your own adventure story that I’ve read in general. I used to see them in my old school’s library, but they never interested me much.
This one caught my attention, however. I’m weak for animal stories and this was no exception. Definitely a very creative story. I’ve seen this kind of formula in other fantasy books I’ve read before, but the spin on it is refreshing.
-- Scully on 9/5/2018 3:32:21 PM with a score of 4
-- LuvLee on 6/22/2018 10:56:34 PM with a score of 1
As someone who has read "And Then There Were None," I can say for certain that you did an amazing job adapting the story into this game! Though it may not be as twisted and surprising as Christie's novel, I love how all the deaths adhered to the poem at the beginning, just like with "Ten Little Soldier Boys."

This was a very creative spin-off of the original novel, both due to its format as a long poem and to its original take on the characters, manifested as four adorable little mice. Great work!
-- StillWatersRunDeep on 3/17/2018 11:07:32 PM with a score of 4
Why mo din't live? It said on the link of the page "Ru and Mo ending"
-- Darkeyes427 on 2/28/2018 5:51:25 AM with a score of 2
Short and sweet, the perfect combination
-- Aegle on 2/27/2018 7:31:31 PM with a score of 4
Rhyme scheme was clunky, rhymes were forced. Not impressed, but it was ok.
-- pygmypuff on 2/4/2018 11:43:25 AM with a score of 2
I loved this story, not only for its wit and poetic form of writing, but even more because I'm familiar with And Then There Were None and Until Dawn, the two references in the story.
Fantastic job, AppDude and TerrAquVen
-- MrRun2 on 1/18/2018 3:48:24 PM with a score of 4
Well got the "Ru and Pa Ending"
-- TestingJest on 12/9/2017 3:36:00 AM with a score of 2
Yes!!! They all survived!
-- Alexandra on 12/8/2017 7:42:05 PM with a score of 4
I loved it! I love the poetry, and the plot.
-- Cookiekat1029 on 11/24/2017 11:11:02 AM with a score of 4
Yay! I got the four mice ending!
-- Random User on 11/12/2017 7:45:36 PM with a score of 4
Loved the poem style for the story, really was a nice lighthearted story, enjoyed it. If only it could be longer.

It really reminded me of the old TV show called Tom and Jerry.
-- TheSurvivalist on 10/11/2017 8:07:53 PM with a score of 4
A charming, short little bedtime story. However, the rhymes didn't work at times and the rhythm felt very stilted, with extra words dragging the sentences down. I recommend reading the story out loud to see which points in the story are off.
-- SixtySnakes on 8/27/2017 8:17:10 AM with a score of 4
This was really cute! I managed to get them all through in the end.
-- daimondai13 on 8/21/2017 5:43:26 PM with a score of 4
It was fun! I got the 4 mice ending the first time(I somehow kept them all alive!) I like the rhyming and how simple it is.
-- SilentlySilent on 5/24/2017 6:04:53 PM with a score of 4
Very funny. The rhymes inhanced the experience
-- Sophie curts on 4/22/2017 6:50:00 AM with a score of 2
That was art. That's really all you can say.
-- apsoy on 3/10/2017 6:31:42 PM with a score of 4
Wonderful game!
-- TheAmazingWilson on 3/10/2017 6:51:04 AM with a score of 2
Hey there! :-). Wellcome, new author! I hope you enjoyed writing this story, because I certainly enjoyed playing. Having a virtual chance to peak into a mouse's world for a change. :-). Well done! I am glad I managed to keep a couple of them alive. Glad I have good survival instincts. Or rather, Aru and Pah. The only constructive feedback I think you should make is, giving the player time to perhaps rescue all 4 mouse, rather than in my case, a select 2. I feel Li's and her sibling's departure came much too soon, in other words. I would have preferred to find a choice where I could save them, or to find a choice which allowed the mice to out wit the cat... I believe that strength does not depend on size alone... Overall though, as I said, great story, and bravo.
-- Rahila on 2/20/2017 1:36:43 PM with a score of 2
I played it several times to get all of the outcomes. I really enjoyed this one.
-- VRoman on 2/16/2017 1:56:48 PM with a score of 4
I got the Ru, Li, Mo, and Pa ending on my FIRST TRY! OH YEAH!!! But this game was awesome.
-- Bob_The_Destroyer on 1/26/2017 5:42:40 PM with a score of 4
Great Game
-- _skye_ on 1/25/2017 1:37:18 PM with a score of 2
-- Asmaa on 12/6/2016 3:19:53 PM with a score of 4
Amazing, but rough. Wow. I enjoyed it being a simple poem based off of a real book. By the way, I got the Pa and Ru ending.
-- AntiGitt on 12/5/2016 9:10:54 PM with a score of 2
Poor little mice! I got the ending where Pa and Ru survived.
Very nice story, I enjoyed it! Loved how it was like a poem.
-- VanillaCat on 11/10/2016 11:20:25 PM with a score of 2
A great read!
-- Eleanor Tischler on 11/2/2016 12:15:45 AM with a score of 1
Really cute and unique. The fact it was in a poem and rhymed was pretty neat and must have been hard to do. The advanced editor was used very well, not an overwhelming amount of items but enough for my own liking.
-- Zulutrader on 10/27/2016 2:04:55 PM with a score of 2
cute and exciting!
-- BigRonn77 on 10/19/2016 3:37:04 PM with a score of 2
Awesome! I really liked how you made us think that one decision was the best, while in actuality, the choice that looked stupid would keep you alive! Great work!
-- DoctorFizz0505 on 10/6/2016 12:22:22 PM with a score of 4
This was an AMAZING storygame! I love the storyline and how you can choose what you think is right but then POP, a mouse dies. This is also really creative and it's sorta simple but SO GOOD! Great job!
-- ShortHairCat on 9/15/2016 5:35:02 PM with a score of 4
I enjoyed this a lot. I was so desperate to save all 4 of the sweet mice, I replayed this over 4 times! Aww, this story is so sweet!!
-- Guest on 9/14/2016 4:57:37 PM with a score of 4
It was very nice. I managed to let all four mice live.
-- Amtastic on 8/29/2016 4:52:25 AM with a score of 4
Absolutely loved it. Endearing, yet really disturbing at times. One of the best ones i've read.
-- JossieMime on 8/11/2016 7:43:19 PM with a score of 0
Gruesome, I must say. But nice! All of them survived for me.
-- JplaysStuff on 8/2/2016 1:41:42 PM with a score of 4
A truely enjoyable time spent playing this. I loved the poetic touch and the character developement~
-- I_Moan on 8/1/2016 11:14:24 PM with a score of 4
Great story/poem game! But...quite brutal descriptions, more serious and less childish than I expected as....most poems that are rhymiest are more kid-friendly...because having something gory/unnerving stuck in your head.....
It was really fun though! Thanks for putting in all the effort to write it, must've been hard to keep rhyming!
-- NoNAME? on 7/25/2016 3:27:46 PM with a score of 2
All my mice got out alive! :D
This was a beautiful poem/story!!!!
I loved it loved it loved it <3
-- Seto on 7/24/2016 12:28:03 AM with a score of 4
-- McCrystalKitty on 7/10/2016 12:38:33 AM with a score of 1
Wow......, it's just...........I'm Speechless. How is it possible to make such beautiful games.
-- Kalhdherav on 7/8/2016 7:30:22 AM with a score of 2
not bad
-- omgitschowhall on 6/30/2016 5:16:19 PM with a score of 0
The rhymes must have been hard to make, nevertheless it was a great storygame
-- Turbotorque on 6/20/2016 10:13:39 AM with a score of 4
-- Santa on 5/28/2016 3:59:23 PM with a score of 4
Woo, got the Pa, Li, Mo, and Ru ending first try! Though I.. sorta cheated with Pa's ending because I thought investigating the strange sound was more important than the paper clip. BUT NEVERMIND THAT.
-- Wubbalubbadubdub on 5/26/2016 9:16:20 PM with a score of 4
I got the Ru, Li, Mo, and Pa ending. YAY FOR ME! It was a very enjoyable story, and the rhyming scheme was a nice touch. Two thumbs up.
-- Elt_1080 on 5/13/2016 6:37:28 PM with a score of 4
I liked it, I was actually scared for the mice.
-- James on 4/26/2016 11:47:26 AM with a score of 3
Yeah, saved them all this time!
-- Deadly Lion on 4/21/2016 10:37:58 AM with a score of 4
Got the Ru and Pa ending.
-- Deadly Lion on 4/21/2016 10:25:43 AM with a score of 2
An entertaining and engaging read. Not too long, not too short, with interesting choices spaced out at good intervals. There's also a lot of work evident in the rhyming and the concept. I got the Pa epilogue. A surprising but believable plot twist occurred!
-- HermionesEvilTwin on 4/18/2016 10:39:44 AM with a score of 1
great but how did po survive but overall it was great easily one of the best thing i have read all day loved it and the first poem i have actually read.
-- Samuel on 4/16/2016 12:54:03 AM with a score of 4
yay! i got all of the mice out.
-- emma on 4/15/2016 7:51:52 AM with a score of 4
good, but not to good, but at the same time good
-- aadfg on 3/27/2016 4:20:47 PM with a score of 2
I beat the game! All mice got outside! This was a very good game.
-- MasonJarGuzzi on 3/7/2016 12:38:56 AM with a score of 4
So cute! So fluffy. This is the kind of story I'd read my kids, if I had any, haha. The rhyming really works, which must have taken forever, and the adventure was a lot of fun. I have never been so happy to see a mouse in my life until I read that you gave Pa a chance to come back.

They were an adorable cast of characters, and kept me playing and playing until I found a way for all of them to be together and live happily ever after.
-- the_quiller on 3/2/2016 5:55:20 PM with a score of 4
The effort that must have gone into thus is unbelievable - well done. I must say that some of the gender pronouns didn't quite match up, but apart from that...whew.
-- LilyPop on 2/24/2016 11:36:22 PM with a score of 2
Two words:Very Good1=)
-- Timeless_Sakura on 2/18/2016 5:53:29 AM with a score of 4
At first, when Pa "died", I panicked and quit XD then I replayed and got the four mouse ending. This time I purposely got the Pa ending 'cos I wanted to see if the last mouse would choke herself. I was curious okay don't judge XD Anyways, this was completely amazing and very sweet, I loved the poem format and I liked how giving the more irresponsible mouse the needle would actually save Li. I thought No would be the last one left for some reason though, dunno why. Uh... I'm not good at leaving comments, I'll stop rambling now.
-- Cinderblaze on 2/14/2016 9:07:09 AM with a score of 1
I got the 4 mice alive ending, it was very sweet and short and I liked it.
-- Reelru on 1/29/2016 4:58:16 PM with a score of 4
I liked it, I really loved how it was rhyming and like a children's story (except,of course, that sometimes the mice died). I got the ending when Ru and Pa are alive; HOW DO YOU KEEP THEM ALL ALIVEEEEEE
-- Yuisawachelsa on 1/29/2016 8:06:21 AM with a score of 2
I got the ending where they all survived. That was an awesome story!
-- Elsa on 1/19/2016 3:58:13 PM with a score of 4
i have the best ending, all four mine survived
-- kai jun on 1/17/2016 7:40:26 AM with a score of 4
I loved it. Even though it wasn't very long, the game clearly had a lot of work put in it, especially with the rhyming and good grammar.One of my favorite story games.

-- Snowflame on 1/8/2016 10:11:57 PM with a score of 4
A nice little whimsical story. The rhyiming really set a sort of lighthearted mood. It wasn't something I want to play over and over again, but if you want a nice, simple storygame I would recommend this one.
-- AllThatIsGold on 1/7/2016 6:03:46 PM with a score of 4
The perfect ending is so heart-warming
-- 4l3x4nd3r on 1/7/2016 8:56:42 AM with a score of 4
Haha! Very catchy
-- Riversage on 1/4/2016 9:18:29 AM with a score of 4
It was an interesting game.
-- Silverflame on 12/26/2015 11:27:33 PM with a score of 4
This was really enjoyable. It was cute, adorable and very entertaining, and I loved the whole rhyming scheme going on. Great work.
-- Steve24833 on 12/16/2015 11:34:55 AM with a score of 4
I loved the rhyming style, and the fact that you actually allowed the story to branch off into many different endings. It was a well thought out story, and I liked how you spent time to make sure the spelling and grammar were correct and fixed all the bugs. Good work.
-- CurseOfTime on 12/13/2015 6:18:22 PM with a score of 4
Pretty good, The rhyming aspect was a very nice touch.
It was like a nursery rhyme, only a little messed up.
Still it was well written and worked hard on. I liked it :)
-- Shadowulf on 12/2/2015 4:46:29 AM with a score of 3
I believe this story was well thought out. I liked the rhyming, and I am going to read it again to see the different endings. Thanks for this.
-- Jessie on 11/26/2015 10:20:01 PM with a score of 1
It only took me twice to save all four mice.
I loved it, it was fun, nice and long yet not too long!
-- butterclaw on 11/19/2015 4:48:31 PM with a score of 4
A charming little story, I loved the rhymes and twists! I'm so glad I managed to save them all on my first try or I would have felt very bad,
-- Esther on 11/7/2015 4:18:35 PM with a score of 4
Very good, but I didn't care for the rhyme scheme. It seemed more like a bad rap than anything poetic.
-- jamescoker1226 on 11/5/2015 11:44:35 PM with a score of 4
It's an interesting idea having a choose your own adventure poem! Just don't trust me to protect your mice, I only saved one...

I reckon that the poetic style gave the story an interesting personality.
-- jibberish on 10/31/2015 8:22:47 AM with a score of 1
Awesome story I loved it :)
-- Kookie Kat on 10/29/2015 9:06:35 AM with a score of 4
1st: 2 mice
2nd: 2 mice
3rd: 4 mice
-- ShowMeTheCode on 10/28/2015 4:34:42 AM with a score of 4
Awesome! ?? ????????
-- ShowMeTheCode on 10/27/2015 6:18:11 AM with a score of 2
-- robinsoul on 10/22/2015 8:41:39 PM with a score of 1
This game was pretty fun! I will admit that I didnt make all the right choices, but this game will give you an opportunity to experience the magic of writing!!!
-- Jessica on 10/11/2015 7:53:33 PM with a score of 0
The first time I played through it, I only saved two mice. It was slightly horrifying every time one died, but it made the story that much more interesting. It was still fun on the second play through, as well.
-- csgamble on 10/7/2015 4:15:07 PM with a score of 4
Amazing! I loved it and got all four mice!
-- adventurer on 10/6/2015 9:50:49 PM with a score of 4
Nice game, I managed to save 3 of the mice.
-- Comikat on 10/5/2015 5:39:19 PM with a score of 3
Great Story! Proud to have a 1st time go, 4/4 mice survived!
-- Drydenhouse on 10/3/2015 9:47:04 PM with a score of 4
That was really good, I only managed to keep Pa alive.
-- corgi213 on 10/3/2015 4:04:23 PM with a score of 1
It kept my attention
-- Robin on 10/2/2015 3:47:46 PM with a score of 2
I really enjoyed the story and how it was written.
-- _Zomby_ on 10/2/2015 2:46:49 PM with a score of 1
Wow this is ingenious. The way its toldreally highlights your actions!
-- RedSaber on 10/1/2015 3:58:42 AM with a score of 4
This was really creative! A whole story told in poem form!

Ru and Pa ending.

Thanks for fixing the bug!
-- Plaacchei on 9/27/2015 5:35:49 PM with a score of 2
The newest release from AppDude: simply amazing work. A job well done.
-- At_Your_Throat on 9/27/2015 3:41:01 PM with a score of 4
-- CookieRage7 on 9/27/2015 2:59:50 PM with a score of 4
Good job. Some of the ryhmes were a little awkward, but all in all it was a fun, interesting and unique story.
-- FazzTheMan on 9/26/2015 12:56:40 AM with a score of 4
-- HI on 9/24/2015 8:51:43 PM with a score of 4
Best story yet!
-- TerrAquVen on 9/24/2015 2:23:11 PM with a score of 3
That was surprisingly good. *looks at who wrote it* Well no friggin' shit it's good, AppDude made it!

But yeah, this is a very well made story. I think that part of its appeal comes from how it's written like a poem, and that it feels just like a fairy tale that one would read as a child. Also, that butterfly effect thing is pretty neat. 5/8
-- Chris113022 on 9/24/2015 10:58:41 AM with a score of 4
Surprised you can get so many stories out and they all are of such good quality.

AppDude, keep churning them out!
-- Aducan on 9/24/2015 6:52:38 AM with a score of 0
Excellent, the best poem story-game on the site and definitely should be featured I think :D
-- Will11 on 9/23/2015 10:55:42 PM with a score of 1
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