Hard Night

I like how this story starts with that most cliche of openers, the protagonist waking up in bed--only Chris subverts that by having the bed be a bed of garbage. That engaged me right away.

The first few pages set up the scene nicely with very little time spent on non-exposition chitchat, and getting you right into the action with hard-boiled and noirish description.
The choice structure, which is one of the most important things for me as a reader just worked--there were few moments of left door/right door choices--instead, I am making tactical choices that at the same time establish character. Am I more a detective or more violent in my initial approach? Am I a killer or Batman?

The tonal approach of gritty realistic combat comes through when asked whether to fight with weapon or fist--"Pragmatism is Key" the page is titled. Yes. You want a weapon. Obviously. You are not an immortal, omnipotent superhero here, but a man who needs to think tactically.

Considering the story's focus on observation and tactical shrewdness, I thought the antidote puzzle was a bit of a misfire, because everything around it is about observation, while the puzzle pull more for brute force (at least, I didn't find any clues that helped there.) Maybe there could be something subtle in the narration that could rule out one of the colors, or something like that. This was the one misstep, I think, in a rollicking and action-packed adventure.

Chris does combat really well. I absolutely adore how it punishes me for not thinking through the obvious consquences of my combat actions.

Writing-wise, Chris knows his Silver Age tropes, and the prose bears that you. There were a very few moments of style weirdness (like, in this gritty narration, using "as it were") On the whole, very very solid and entertaining story.

I would not recommend this story to everyone, but if you’re at all interested in the Question or want a quick story full of action that isn’t shit, you might find “Hard Night” a good read.

It starts of quite nicely with some cool cover art that also serves to show what the Question looks like, which was good because Chris is the only reason I even know who the Question is. It also established something of what the city the story is set in looks like.

I didn’t have any problems with reading this fanfiction, despite me, again, having only even heard of the main character because of it. There was a bit in one of the ends where it referenced some people that I had no idea who they were, but even that was written in a way that I got the gist of everything.

By far, the worst part about this story was the puzzle. First off, it seems really implausible that there would be substances labelled only by color with instructions written in such a ridiculous way, and somehow some of those substances combined to the antidote. I guess this can be chalked up to wacky silver age comic universe or something.
Aside from the overall weirdness, it was a real pain to solve the puzzle. If there is a way to solve that sort of thing aside from trial and error, I don’t know it. Puzzles are usually meant to be a mental challenge rather than an exercise in using the back button.

There were some mildly humorous parts in the narration, and it was fun to beat up the bad guys. The writing was very decent as well, and there were no errors that really distracted from the story. It was also not difficult to find the endings, of which there were several and all written with care.

Overall, this was a pretty good story even for those who don’t know the Question, but the puzzle bit took away a lot of enjoyment from the first half.

Whoa.

Chris has published a game. I'm as shocked as anybody. People all over the site no doubt lost bets over this.

It's short, obviously, but well written and a plot covering the details of one night's escapades is a thing that works well in the superhero genre in particular.

The classy title art is a nice touch, although a side effect is that you can barely see the 'by Chris11034402348720984028402' link to start the game.

I know basically nothing about the character that you didn't bring up in your thread, but it was easy enough to follow along just with a hero doing typical hero-like things like punching bad guys in an abandoned warehouse. This whole little adventure basically reads like old school Batman if he'd suddenly lost all his toys. (And got worse at chemistry.)

Just a few thoughts on the plot setup in the beginning, basically a couple of ways this might have been expanded/made more logical/whatever: knowing immediately 'the syringe must have contained something lethal' and that he needed to find the antidote seems like a leap. My immediate assumption in a scenario like that wouldn't be that it was the kind of poison that needed an antidote, but just some random drug that knocked him out and needed time to wear off.

Maybe it could've been a specific drug he already knew something about by his time tracking the gang's activities? Or maybe searching the warehouse for clues could let him find the actual syringe still with traces in it that would let him do something in the lab to figure out what it was. Mixing the antidote is the only real 'puzzle' of the game and that whole section in the lab could've been longer and more involved. As it is, the 'need an antidote or you will die' premise and the tension of needing to hurry there was done away with after just a few clicks and then I was back to punching bad guys, which involves far more choices and ways to screw up.

Also, a note on a poker table seems like an unrealistic way for these guys to communicate btw, since presumably they have phones...so right now searching the warehouse itself is a bit pointless since you're already assuming they'll be in the apartments.

Anyway overall I enjoyed this and congrats on finishing a game! (You'll be happier to know it gets easier after the first one!) So I'm glad to see you've got some future projects planned now too. Even more one shot stories about The Question would be welcome, the fanfic category here is pretty weak and could use more decent additions. I know you had some issues with a few of the links on this one though so I'd recommend grabbing a proofreader in advance next time, or even asking for volunteers in your thread. Remember, there's never any rush to publish unless you're in a contest or something. What's one more day when it's already been four years? :P

I think I'm reading the series out of order but whatever. Good as the other ones I read!

Well the first entry certainly wasn't as long and fun as its sequel, but man, this little duology is so well written, inspired and accurate, you've honestly reignited my love for an obscure villain. You've written both of these relatively recently; I'd love to see a big finale in a third installment. You definitely love this character, and you've successfully spread it.

The swift, brutal action, comic-book style narration, and simple but well-executed premise are all present here from your second installment, and this feels like the gripping first scene of the movie that would be both of them put together into one extremely solid love letter to a character that is vastly more badass and interesting than his pop culture status would have you believe.

From a fellow DC Comics fan, and comic fan in general, thank you for the wonderful fanfiction. I said it in my last review for you: this is how you do it. There's nothing wrong with it when actual thought, effort, and passion is put into the end result. This game is good, the second one is great, for what they both are. Fantastic work.

it's not bad, but its definitely not great

This story was decent. I won’t call it amazing or anything, though it works. This is a shock to me on account of the fact that I’ve never even heard of the question beyond these stories. You know it is true fan fiction when it is good to the people who have never even heard of the fan fiction. There is also a pet peeve I have with fan fiction that I’m fairly sure this story did not fall into the trap of, and that is when a fanfiction is nothing but a retelling of the events of the source material. This is a major turn away point for me, for if I start reading a fanfiction only to find that it is just a retelling of the source material it disappoints me. Like there were so many things you could have done, though you are going to show me a story I already know everything about?
Though this fanfic does not fall into this trap. It is a day in the life type of fan fic and it benefits greatly because of it. Speaking of witch…

The story is a day in the life of type of story. It is grounded. It does not shoot for a giant story, just one day in the life of a guy. This allows the author to hyper focus on an event, and say everything there is to be said about it. While this is good there is another thing I think is good and bad.

The story is basic. Now this is neither good nor bad. Though I feel it needs to be pointed out. The plot is simple. You are a guy, and this guy is poisoned. Poisoned guy can go beat up some guys or get antidote. Or both if he only does that. The warehouse has no depth to it, the lab boils down to a guessing game puzzle, (that has been fixed, though that just makes the lab have zero depth as well,) and the apartment has the most depth, though it is nothing more than a drawn out fight scene.

Now in conclusion I like this game. It is a nice, basic, plot of a superheroes daily life. You should read it because even if you don’t like it, it is too short to ignore the possibility that you will

5 out of 8.

very short, very linear, you can do better. You've got the right idea but didn't go anywhere with it.

Short and sweet.

Edit: second time through, I noticed that if I go to the apartment, then the warehouse, there's no link to continue. May want to patch that.