Player Comments on The Adventures of Phoebe McGee: Episode 1, The Lighthouse

8/8 One of the best stories I have read here. lots of choices and the writing was perfect for the story. It was like seeing the world through a 13 yo's eyes. well done. One mistake I noticed was that if you went back to visit the ship wreck later in the story, when you examine the wheel and the panel, you get stuck there, there is no exit link. Other then that wonderful story. Hope after all this time there was a part 2
-- JinDary on 5/19/2016 10:35:45 AM with a score of 0
Bloody incredible. Your writing style is most befitting of the era and the protagonist. I felt entirely and completely immersed. Your usage of the advanced editor was marvelous and the scope of the story was appropriate. I found only one minor bug (I couldn't leave the shipwreck's helm room without backing up after I came back the second time) but it didn't detract from my experience whatsoever. Thank you for your contribution to the website. Phenomenal talent.
-- JJJ-thebanisher on 2/3/2011 4:34:12 PM with a score of 0
I like that you can semi-freely explore the island -- your background in Interactive Fiction definitely shows. Some of the imagery and locations is memorable and intriguing. I appreciated the photos, as well.

Perhaps your writing style is *too* IF-like, in that you usually describe locations and objects in a detached, passive voice (even though you'll say "Phoebe saw..."), rather than as a novelist would by centering and grounding things in Phoebe's experience and actions of the moment.
-- HoraceTorys on 1/17/2011 10:50:25 AM with a score of 0
so cool and fun
-- Reven on 1/31/2018 1:30:39 PM with a score of 0
Hey, I got to keep both the Pearl ring of swan and the Octo pendant left by the dog! Too bad this is only episode 1, so if the swan stands for courage and the oak stands for kindness, why would the two forces be at throats with each other rather than being friends? ;)
-- TestingJest on 1/3/2018 10:31:32 PM with a score of 0
Really enjoyed it. Wish it went further though.
-- Aynmb on 8/23/2017 11:31:51 PM with a score of 0
I can't help but wonder if there's more to this story than just lighting the lighthouse.

The story was nice enough. A lot of choices, and the chance ones are the most entertaining. It CAN be quite dull though, as the fact that I had to wander around the same pages for over thirty minutes. A hint or two on where to go would be nice.

Another thing that irritated me is how straightforward Maize and Jake are about certain things. At first they're concealing everything from Phoebe, but when you ask a bit later they'll be like *info dump to the moon*. Not cool.

The conversations could also use a little more realism.
-- ShadowStriker113 on 5/15/2017 10:29:34 PM with a score of 0
good game.
-- Chad on 1/14/2017 12:23:06 AM with a score of 0
I agree with other comments here, a totally riveting game that I wanted to go further than it did. The story is excellent and left me wanting more.

There are a couple of issues with the game part, namely getting stuck in the cabin and the rusty car re-appearing in the forest after floating off and sinking in the river.

These didn't affect my enjoyment. Probably the best 'story' and 'game' combined that I've read here. Well done and let's have the next episode!
-- HM000 on 1/8/2017 2:43:20 AM with a score of 0
rubbish game and story
-- andre spence on 11/10/2016 4:47:01 AM with a score of 0
bored to death
-- unknown user on 11/10/2016 4:46:30 AM with a score of 0
SO GOOD! the choices really do impact the story and I was able to follow clues about what I should do next. I highly recommend reading this one. I really liked that there were so many choices. One tip I would give is to KEEP TRYING to do tasks even if it says you failed to do something. After a few tries you will succeed. I would also advise to regularly go back to Maize's cabin and talk to her. Have fun playing!
-- emilykat44 on 8/6/2016 3:36:35 PM with a score of 0
Nice little story full of mystery. Can't wait to read the rest of the series!
-- BigRonn77 on 7/1/2016 12:34:43 PM with a score of 0
Can't wait for the next part :)
-- superpo on 3/25/2016 6:02:16 AM with a score of 0
Very entertaining.
-- Snefnie on 2/8/2016 8:57:17 AM with a score of 0
I really enjoyed the childlike nature of Phoebe's thoughts and actions; it made me feel like I was a kid again exploring behind my own grandparents' house. The writing is great, and the compass directions really helped me keep track of where to go. I also like that it's more focused on working through a good story than winning a game. I hope for an Episode 2 soon!
-- WordSmith37 on 7/16/2015 12:18:29 PM with a score of 0
Too long
-- Jolt on 1/31/2015 8:41:59 PM with a score of 0
Nice game.
-- Silverflame on 1/19/2015 4:25:09 PM with a score of 0
I found this pretty interesting. I would love to know what happens to Pheobe, Lilly, Maize, and Jake!
-- Grace on 12/7/2014 8:54:54 PM with a score of 0
It's good, but more please.
-- spot10 on 10/27/2014 4:36:07 PM with a score of 0
I LOVE IT
-- Sampel00 on 9/27/2014 7:24:24 AM with a score of 0
Marvelous, very well done! You really put a lot of effort and thought into this, and I love it! I'm looking forward for more, and excellent job. Keep up the very, very great work!
-- mjrealast on 5/12/2014 11:32:32 AM with a score of 0
message me when you finish part 2
-- zeke86198 on 2/15/2014 11:47:50 PM with a score of 0
I really enjoyed how poetic the story telling was. It kept me interested. It ended a little abruptly for me though, but very enjoyable and worth the play. :)
-- hunbun85 on 11/8/2013 1:19:46 PM with a score of 0
Excellent story! So well written and so interesting, a real joy to play.
-- yt on 7/26/2013 8:46:20 PM with a score of 0
this game was awesome. you put a lot of thought into it and I will play it everytime I visit this site, which is everyday. It will be the first game I play. I'm gonna tell all of my friends about you and this game. Make more like it!
-- brianna on 7/8/2013 2:15:15 PM with a score of 0
I really liked the adventure aspects of this story, as well as the part of getting to know the characters. This story definitely deserves more credit than it's given, and I hope you can continue this series!
-- Lia on 6/30/2013 4:19:46 PM with a score of 0
It was really good. The characters are developed well and the plot is interesting...so interesting I vote for you to continue if you haven't already.
-- bookmonkey on 6/1/2013 4:54:35 PM with a score of 0
Had a lot of fun. I'll be expectantly awaiting the next time we hear about Phoebe.
-- ChronoStrike on 5/14/2013 1:04:58 AM with a score of 0
good, i want more!
-- cm on 6/3/2012 8:08:29 PM with a score of 0
it was amazing
-- bells23 on 5/10/2012 9:03:34 AM with a score of 0
wow that was great! best story i have come across so far on this site! I loved it! (even though I did not save the ship...)
-- coco on 2/28/2012 6:37:26 AM with a score of 0
Can't wait for the next chapter :)
-- BerkaZerka on 1/1/2012 1:35:34 PM with a score of 0
That was a really good game.
-- cool74 on 6/6/2011 6:59:27 PM with a score of 0
A very well constructed and engaging story. Can't wait for the next chapter!
-- chesterschvester on 5/18/2011 10:19:22 AM with a score of 0
it was really good except i was really stuck at the end when i was trying to figure out how to light the lighthouse at night, and i kept tunning out of time so i just eventually gave up. But other than that it was really good and i want to read more.
-- Salidia on 3/10/2011 9:52:09 PM with a score of 0
Hey,
My name is Stephanie and I am a 13 year old seventh grade girl. Unlike most girls, video games are my favorite. I thought that this game was really fun. However, I was kinda freaked out/disappointed at the end with the man with the floppy hat carrying her away. I'd suggest maybe putting a little thing at the beginning of the game asking for difficulty. You could have beginner, normal, or advanced. For beginner, you could eliminate the death option, and for normal, you could make it easier to get away. You could also ask new text gamers that selected beginning if they would like to have little hints show up at the bottom of the screen before starting the game. Just an idea. I would probably choose normal or advanced, because when it comes to text games, I am a stronger veteran. But some people will get disappointed when it comes to losing, that they won't give it a second c
-- Stephanie on 2/1/2011 10:28:43 PM with a score of 0
Excellent adventure. I only got 17 on kindness, not sure how to get that up to 20, but otherwise, I absolutely loved it. Please, please make a sequel. I want to find Jake!
-- Poet on 1/11/2011 12:34:57 PM with a score of 0
That's all? I feel like I missed the actual story part of this game. It started to talk about evil wolves and supernatural Hitlers and missing grandparents, but then all I did was light a lantern. It might be worth railroading the player through more of the interesting bits (or at least making them more forgiving, like the dying bird).

I'm also skeptical about the supernatural Hitler/wolf/crow thing. Not that I'm opposed to fantasy elements in games, but the Ghostapo thing has a tendency to get silly.
-- katz on 1/10/2011 3:52:16 PM with a score of 0
I love this! I did it a couple of times, and each time it was different. Kind of like those books in which you choose your own fate. Fun!!!!! :)
-- Kaitlin on 1/9/2011 3:54:01 PM with a score of 0
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