Your existence came to be long before you came to realize it was an existence at all.
Only fragments of this time are remembered, the rest is lost to time. You remember the face of a caring being, yet it was without any clear physical appearance. You also remember a home, although it to never had any tangible features. The only thing that you knew before you knew of existence was love, and that was all, but existing has changed everything. Now the love is gone, for there is nothing to love, no reason to love. There is no reason to do anything. You try, however, to find some meaning, some enlightenment, yet none comes. So you wander. You wander the universe with no clear path in mind. You see the ruins of civilization, all of humanity's triumphs and failures, and yet it means nothing to you. A mere scar on the rock. You disregard the traces of what was once what was once thought to be of utmost significance as if it were one sand grain on an endless beach, washed away by the sea. Instead you look for the answer. An answer to a question you do not know.