Player Comments on Earth Systems Adventure

If this is for an assignment, well, I don't understand how teachers found this site anyway. I think the "Restart" option is what's making people not like this. :/

There isn't much I can say about this storygame. It's not a story, and it's not a game. It's the freaking water cycle, and the way it works annoys me. You're literally just a droplet of water, and the entire thing could just go on and on.

The activity would be better and more informative if you explained how the thing worked and made more description. The pictures were cute, and for some reason it made the storygame seem innocent.

It's not the story because the droplet didn't really have anything to do... things were being done to it. It's not a game because there's nothing fun about it and doesn't require any thinking. It's like the "left door or right door" thing except dressed up with pretty words.

I don't know why I just wrote a long comment on this one, but okay. Yeah. It'll, again, most likely be deleted/unpublished/whatever if it's not improved. Honestly, I think it could stay up if it were more "activity"-like.

Hmm... slightly more effort is put into this one. I give you an E for effort!

Well with pictures I suppose this could be rather fun but it is too short, contains no story or characters or real plot (but some cool settings) so it's not a choose your own story, ergo it will be deleted so if it's school work you had better show it to your teacher quickly.
Still it's an interesting idea but unfortunately there is only so much you can do with it.

There does seem to be a little more effort put into this one than into the others so far, but the same basic advice applies to the point where I'm just going to copy and paste it:

I realize you're probably very young, so maybe this is more your teacher's fault, but either of you taking some time to look around the site should have led to the realization that this isn't the kind of thing that's going to get a good reception from readers.

I realize this was a school project, but it's going to get judged by the same standards as any other story while it's here. It was your choice to publish it instead of using sneak peek and just sharing the link with your teacher.

This will be unpublished in a day or two for not meeting minimum site standards, just fyi. (Depending on ratings.) Don't republish it afterwards or you can expect it to just be deleted.

I can see you know your science... but... I hate to say it but I got bored.

Better than the other two before it. I guess this means you win!

No.