5/5/2011

3/25/2026 1:52 PM

25832

11

13 wins / 25 losses

Lauded Sage Exemplar

Behold my profile.
There's, uh, nothing here right now. Someday I should probably find a balance between the old text wall, and...this. (she drew my avatar you know!)

>DEVOTION

A Stack of Cats

You are a man on a mission. The cats, they must be stacked.

A puzzling math and logic game I made just to put some of the scripting practice I've been doing to use. Have fun and please let me know if you encounter any bugs.

Should be solvable by middle schoolers, or those with same basic level of intelligence as a middle schooler.

Agent of Order

Orbiting a barren planetoid in a system full of nothing just past the edge of the frontier, The Last Outpost is just another refueling station. Strategically important, true, but on a routine stop you never expected to spend longer than a couple hours there, let alone a couple of days fighting for your life...

There are five epilogues, but some may be difficult to discover. Note that actions have consequences, but not always immediate ones. (And if you just need an End Game link, go play around with the probe.)

Facts About the Planet and the Solar System

A compilation of some little known facts about the solar system, as well as the debunking of a few myths.

In addition to the scientific explanations, there's a small story dramatizing it all.

Hopefully young readers will find this fun as well as educational. :)

(Might not be the greatest story ever written, but consider this: it got me 200 points.)

Inseparable

It doesn't matter what they say...

Jack the Bean Counter

KOBOLD KEBABS

For Endmaster's 4th Prompt Contest. The story must involve a cooking competition.

Love is for the Birds

...and the squirrels. Sort of.



Written in six hours, for no other reason than to avoid consignment to the SHAME pit after my other Romance contest entry didn't want to cooperate.

Now You Gotta Deal With This S***

A tale told in verse. A text from your sister requesting a pick up from a party leads to a night of strangeness.

Inspired by Bucky's ballad contest. Though...I wouldn't call this a ballad. I'm not sure what I'd call it, actually, other than exceedingly stupid, and fun to write.

(Don't pay any attention to the scores, they're just for me to track which endings reviewers get.)

Read My Stories or Die!

HATE.

THE PURITY AND INTENSITY OF MY HATE IS LIKE A THOUSAND MERCILESS, UNQUENCHABLE SUNS.

AND YET, I ONLY NEED ONE...


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Silver Horn, Silver Hooves

When the weather is fine, you've been coming to this grove to drink from the pool for centuries now. Today, you meet a stranger and hear a story that changes all that...



A fairy tale adventure.

Another Damn Wolf Story

unpublished

Character Creator

unpublished

A list of storygames with substantial effort put in, all written in the last couple of years and sorely in need of ratings and reviews.

A modernized guide to the forums. The path to internet popularity and happiness, and a few CYS specific do's and don'ts.

No, no, the priests were just there to show the colonists how to calm God down so he'd stop sending lions after them. The Samaritan version of things is that they were there all along though, while the Jews were insisting they were foreigners the Assyrians forcibly settled thete who intermarried and adopted a bastardized brand of their religion. Though I suppose DNA testing may have settled that one

Didn't he say he was Catholic? Unless he was just fucking around.

But what's he actually complaining about, he can just move to California to gay marry his first cousin. (With no minimum age as long as there's parental consent.)

A couple of weeks ago I randomly had the idea of finding out what the Samaritans whole point of contention was, just skimmed the wiki and a couple of other places but all the fist shaking at the great bamboozlement of Eli was interesting stuff.

This passage in Kings (that's apparently one of the theories of Samaritan origins) was always funny to me though:

And the king of Assyria brought people from Babylon, Cuthah, Avva, Hamath, and Sepharvaim, and placed them in the cities of Samaria instead of the people of Israel. And they took possession of Samaria and lived in its cities. And at the beginning of their dwelling there, they did not fear the Lord. Therefore the Lord sent lions among them, which killed some of them.

So the king of Assyria was told, “The nations that you have carried away and placed in the cities of Samaria do not know the law of the god of the land. Therefore he has sent lions among them, and behold, they are killing them, because they do not know the law of the god of the land.”

Then the king of Assyria commanded, “Send there one of the priests whom you carried away from there, and let himb go and dwell there and teach them the law of the god of the land.” So one of the priests whom they had carried away from Samaria came and lived in Bethel and taught them how they should fear the Lord.

Got lions? Send a priest!

Pretty amazing they're still around at all though. They're actually doing better than they were before, they got knocked down to a population of barely 100 by the Ottoman Empire after various other occupiers (particularly Justinian) had their turns. It's all kind of sad really.



Gerizim gang represent. :(

Although they could like, just adopt some babies or something...

Technically you could make the Jael game the one about the women at home and just crank out something quick as another Bible fanfic. You mentioned Ehud and the 600lb Life king in that one so I know you know about the Bible's most comical assassination (when is it not funny for a living Jabba to vore a whole sword with his flab and then collapse on a pile of his own "dirt" while his servants stand awkwardly by the door thinking he's taking a massive crap). Also had an interesting discussion with Petros about the "hypermasculine" corruption of Christianity going on right now, one of the ideas getting circulated apparently is that Adam's big mistake was not in failing to obey God, but in not manning up and taking it upon himself to KILL the snake. Which just has a whole boatload of thematic baggage to it I'm not even going to get into here, but it could make for a decent fanfic.

"A colored and thought out image" of anything he wants?

Ugh. Okay, since this is actually just Jonathan again: on a temporary, probational basis (look those big words up!), I'm fine with you keeping this account since this is less annoying than your usual attempts. I can't guarantee someone else won't just up and ban you though (maybe Will since you snitched on him), and if you start having the usual diarrhea everywhere this offer is obviously rescinded. But this time, I really really recommend you ACTUALLY do the things that are suggested, ACTUALLY read and review storygames and ACTUALLY shut up on the forum. Because I don't think you'll be getting another offer of clemency any time this year.

Never write for somebody else, just wait till you've got your own ideas you really want to get down on the page. In the meantime you can familiarize yourself with the editor though and especially with the other games and authors here by reading and commenting. There's a lot of grimdark fantasy here, Eternal is the big one that's usually recommended if you're into that at all.

This all sounds like something we'd write in the mod edit thread.

There's a special Buddhist hell for people who publish AI stories as their own, but I dunno what Crimson was actually planning with that one. He'd already proven he could actually write though.

Also, howeverv many months/years from now, everyone remember that the official search term for this thread is "inbred beagle". (It'll have the added effect of weirding Mousecore out.)