Space World: Arcaneta

Player Rating4.19/8

"Too few ratings to be ranked"
based on 23 ratings since
played times (finished )

Story Difficulty3/8

"trek through the forest"

Play Length6/8

"It'll be a while, better grab a SnickersĀ®"

Maturity Level6/8

"I'll need to see some identification"
Some material may be inappropriate for persons under age 16. If this were a movie, it would probably between PG-13 and R.

Tags

Oops, someone forgot to take a pit stop on Planet 827.
Now down goes the Sukhoi into the purple surface below, shattering into a dozen pieces, leaving supposingly no one alive.
Except for you.
Landing on Planet 924 or "Arcaneta", you must survive with the resources on the planet, along with your trusty "Smart Suit" which has an helpful AI for all your worries and needs. But the planet isn't empty, of course, there are some wonderful aliens friends who will probably eat you like a potato chip.
Now, good luck to you and I hope you can escape or make yourself a good living.

Because you'll probably die.

NOTES: This is my entry for the January CYOA story and will probably be my first story published on here. The concept of survival has always been interesting to me and I've always liked the sense of danger and adrenaline that these genres have had. I hope the same sense is created in this story but I think this story will mostly be light hearted in its majority and will mostly just be a test for how well I can write in a short amount of time.

Player Comments

The author of this story has a good imagination and the potential to be a great writer. I really appreciate the work that went into this story and the one finished path is of an appropriate length. I feel like the author has a relatively decent handle on story arcing.

There were some very serious issues with this adventure, though. The biggest problem was that it was unfinished and extremely linear. If your story is a summation of a bunch of two-link pages where each page has a link that kills you and a link that continues the story, then you don't have a storygame at all. This needs to be remedied before this can be considered anything more than essentially linear fiction.

Additionally, the author should do some more research into science and technology if these things are going to be critical to the plot of the game. In particular, the author might want to read about the effects of gravity, and the difference between acceleration and velocity. The science doesn't have to be perfect, but it needs to not be obviously incorrect.

Finally, the author should perhaps read some conversations between adults, and try to mimic those conversations so that his adult characters don't behave like children. This is a challenging thing to fake but these so-called astronauts largely seemed to behave like young children and that made it hard to immerse myself in the plot.

Overall, this is a promising storygame from a promising young author, but it is woefully incomplete and requires a great deal more work before it can be well regarded.
-- JJJ-thebanisher on 2/1/2017 9:01:33 PM with a score of 0
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