Player Comments on ATC (the deleted scene)

AGILITY is 55.
SCORE is 100.
STAMINA is 45.

"
AGILITY is 65.
SCORE is 100.
STAMINA is 35."

Interesting...?

I didn't get this or the original ATC thing...what's the whole thing with the bomb and all these events popping up?

I won't rate this for a good reason

Way easy!

As others have said, perhaps you should try adding more detail to describe exactly how he got hit by or blocked your attack. It was still a good bit of fun, though.

Seems to work pretty good :)

I wish you had put this scene in your newest game. I would have loved it. Anyway, maybe you could have added better descriptions in the fight(Like the bomber getting hit or explaining how you are punching/kicking). Still, I did like it.(I love a good action scene) Hope you do more!

6/8

Some improvement over the previous version. Still short and military time hint useless though.

What does "rev.1" mean?

Grammar could use more work.

Keep at it.

Still too short to be continued, still pretty linear.

I finished with my time being 0809 and I had the mask, the envelope, and $57

I guess it's kind of better, but the hint is still irrelevent and you should add it before I start putting int the numbers!

Another thing...I put in 0810 AND 0850 two different times and I won both ways.

A good idea for a plot, but it's too short to 'be continued' and it's basically linear. 3/8

Thanks for the comments, I'm new here and need all the help I can get.
As a kid in the 80's I read CYOA books and loved the multiple endings. - I hearad there was one that never ended (just took you in a loop)?
I wanted to be experamental here too, not a loop but giving the reader a second chance, learn from experience and try again. Like a time traveler could do.
I will work on the suggestions you've made and see what I can do with the advanced editor. Timers would be cool, too. Sorry for the "CYOA Movie" tag, I thought since a movie (Source Code) inspired me... :)

Just realized that there's literally no choice in the entire game.. lame. Also @urnam0, no, timers are something we're lobbying for though.

Also, when you said I had 3 seconds to enter the digits, I thought I would automatically be redirected to the Game Over page after 3 actual seconds. When it didn't happen, I was disappointed. I wonder if there's a way to rig the editor so that it actually takes you to another page after a timed delay.

Also, typos.

Good:
1. Plot
2. The one puzzle

Bad:
1. Pictures could have been chosen better
2. Could've used Items in the story
3. Short

Ugly:
1. Why does the story have the CYOA Movie tag?
2. The military time thing made no sense- once you start with 8 instead of 0, you have no way to go back and correct it anyway, so you lose anyway despite the hint

Not too bad, good pace and mood but too linear to be very interesting.

SPOILER ALERT
Haha, I typed 850 into the phone, and when the notice popped up about military time I pressed yes because it's still am so it doesn't matter... then there was an extra digit. I was so mad when I forgot to put 0850 instead of 850, but I guess if I got it wrong it doesn't matter