Player Comments on The Ballad of the Orchard

This was very heart-wrenching. I must admit that I had some skepticism about a cyoa inspired ballad, but this has certainly exceeded my expectations. There was quite a bit of strong imagery involved, and you did well in painting a picture with your words.

I think that the length was fine in getting it's point across, as I couldn't help but feel a bit emotional towards the end, but getting the true end did help in making this a bit more bittersweet :)

This poem is definitely one of my favorites that I have had the pleasure of reading on this site. I wouldn't mind reading more content from you, be it another ballad, or a storygame.

This certainly brings my ballad to shame.

It's very poetic, very beautiful, very heart-wrenching, has very good imagery at the right places, and contains a lovely message (I felt like there was one, but I don't know if that was your intention). The rhymes are very good, and the lines ran smoothly in my mind and from my mouth.

My only suggestion is to include parahymes to show conflict or whatever dissonance there is through form, though honestly I like it better with normal rhymes.

This is so much better than many of the storygames here, as well as most of the poems I've ever read. This is a wonderful CYOA ballad!

Super beautiful story, reminiscent in the first part of the the giving tree with a young boy taking a fruit. Has different options and overall enjoyable, would read again!!

This was amazing..! I love good poetry, so when I found this, I couldn't help but smile. The story was quite beautiful and tragic. I loved every second.

I got the True Ending on my first try- yay! It was weird that Roy never said anything about the goddess not aging through all those years, though. Overall, a good ballad, as the rhymes were consistent, imagery was accessible, emotional impact could be felt, and story was sweet. Things that could have been improved are a few typos and a more complex rhyme than just two syllables each stanza.

Touching

it was sweet. it was sad. it was good.

I thought this was a really nice story. I really enjoyed that it rhymed.

it was really sad but beautifully simple.

the feels

Ouch.
My heart wasn’t totally okay with this- it was too darn sad- but I loved it. The way it was done and all that added to the angst and... ahh, sad but wonderful.

My favorite entry. Sad, but very well written. 8/8

A truly beauteous masterpiece! 8/8

I loved the poetry and emotion in this story!

I reached the true ending after three tries, and it was beautiful! Very touching for such a short story. The ballad ran very smoothly for the most part, too. Excellent job.

I thoroughly enjoyed this. Well done! 5/8
I got the true ending.

Got the true ending on my second try. I only tried to get his love in the end because the last stanza there suggested that doing otherwise would be because I felt he was too old for me to love, which isn't true.

Damn, this is great! It made me really sad for the goddess.
But the ending made up for that!:)
Great story1

It's so well written, so beautiful! A true 8/8. I played to find every ending.

Amazing!

It's such a beautiful story!(I almost cried tbh) I love your entry. Great work!!