my character is a cowboy crab that says "yee-claw"

it does

Ouch. Well, it's not shitty in the same sense that you were going for, my goal is to basically type whatever and not edit anything. Just a stream of unconnected words. 

I've been inspired to write my own shitty vampire story. It's a bit hard to describe, so here it is: 

shitty vampire story

I’ve always wondered if there’s a world on the other side of my mirror, but my reflection always blocks me. This means I need to sneak past them by turning invisible. Please donate to my GoFundMe so I can build an invisible ray and finally fulfill one of my dreams.

I'm late to this, but I've always been neutral on spending Thanksgiving/Christmas with the extended family. I mean, I don't hate my relatives, but that doesn't mean I want to hang out with a bunch of them for an extended period of time. The idea of risking my life just for a meal and company with people I hardly know seems not worth it.

But maybe I'm just jaded.

It's nothing really special, I just like looking at pictures of tiny food. They're so adorable :3 

for scale

nah, just mini bread like this

Looks legit.