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Toss around ideas and brainstorm your story.

Rex Publica first Brainstormi feedback appreciated

5 years ago

At the time i'm working on  my first CYOA game (might be meglomaniac-ish) and my concept is so far relatively abstract hence  i'd like to hear opinions and ideas about it. (Of course it's a bit undetailed and more the concept first comes however what i'd already figured out)


So the player is in the role of a student going to university studying economics with varying reasons depending on the background the player chose,but hes bored by it and sees his opportunity in politics.


And Now the abstract part

So the guy decides going to university parliament(idk if they exist in the US where i'm Form they do) and the player can basically choose to participate in one of three parties one who want more restriction one who wants nothing changes and one to make it more just and fair (oversimplified) various events of recruiting/choosing/other things . you can in every Party go two ways a totalitarian or a democratic. After the player graduates he wants to rise into higher politics on various ways campaigning becoming mayor building civil movement doing some criminal stuff or even bring a parlamentarian due to good contacts.(i have some ideas in Mund feel free to add yours). 4 years later the players Party may get to Congress or whitehouse or nothing if you are democratic there is going to happen a coup against the then government and civil war errupts (if totalitarian you nicht be the couper).Again depending on the players choices  and the then Situation you have to face dangers that l lie  ahead (international tension Genocide Redemocrasition etc.) That makes about six Main story branches

So to sum up real quick you could be the next Stalin Hitler Churchill Ghandi or Merkel


Now you may steal this idea and write it yourself because i fear it will take loads of time (but i'm dedicated) :D

One last question though how are you writing?because i think that it might makes sense to first write one Branche entirely and work your way then backwards to points where you might have taken another path.Idk however! Thanks in advance


Rex Publica first Brainstormi feedback appreciated

5 years ago

May I wager that you are German? You capitalise your nouns, something that does not happen in the English language aside from things like names. :)

Anyhow,  the story sounds very interesting, but quite elaborate indeed! Maybe a tool to keep track of all the decisions to give you overview might make it easier to keep the story coherent. Right now you want to start your story in university, where our protagonist decides running for student council/government/parliament/whatever, graduates, and then goes for the real deal. This could work, but you want the grand prize to be the White House - and thus to be the President of the United States - and for most American career politicians the path to this goal is extremely long. Say, winning smaller elections in their cities, counties, and states. This gives them influence, connections, and hopefully power. You did mention to start with running for mayor, but do you really want to fill up your story with all these smaller story lines? It could work of course, but either each decision is a small, almost insignificant one untill you get into the presidential race, or the story is going to be huuuuuge, and might get dreadful halfway through.

Personally, I think you should either completely focus on the US presidential storyline, or completely flesh out the college student council storyline. The latter one can seriously work out really well. No need for elaborate backstories such might be needed for the US presidential one, since any student - even one without special connections - could run. Additionally, here there is more room for different parties or even starting one on your one compared to the presidential campaign, since in the real world only the Democratic and the Republican parties are of any significance. It might take the reader a bit out of the story when for instance the Tea Party suddenly wins, since the story is based upon something so specific in the real world. A student council, however, can take many different (and believable) forms, since there are many different universities in the USA. You can even just make one up.

Now, politics is extremely difficult. The problem with a two party system is that it forces the voters into a 'us vs them'-mentality, whereas a multiparty system has to have an opinion on every subject, even if they might not really have any opinions on the matter leading to voters not agreeing with you on every stancd. If you can write this into your story it could be very interesting. For instance, an example. Say that party A wants camera's in every college room in order to video tape every colleges for the students to review back later. Unfortunately, the school board thinks this costs too much money, so in order for this to happen party A has to give up something major. For instance,  a free, or virtually free, student cafetaria. So, if the camera plan gets through, the cafetaria gets more expensive. Now, party B finds this unacceptable, and refuses the camera plan, since it wants to keep the cafetaria as it is. Then there is party C, who does not want the camera's installed at all. Or there might be a party D, who wants the camera's installed, but wants the cafetaria as well, so they offer an alternative for the school board to cut back on. So, this way you have a multiparty system, and conflict to overcome (you want your party to win after all).

Additionally, you can involve all other aspects one can think that is needed for a campaign. Debates, talking to people, creating connections. Or maybe blackmailing, not keeping promises, removing the opponent from the race, laying the right connections, stealing from the funds, etcetera. Being a student even has the added difficulty of needing to pass classes or might otherwise be expelled, and you cannot really run for the student council when you are not a student.

Finally, final tip, reread whatever you write, even something small as a forum post. The post was quite chaotic, and some sentences really needed a rewrite and punctionation. It was sometimes a bit hard to read what you meant. The start of your post was quite clear, however, so I feel that the middle part was mostly due to enthiousiasm and writing too quickly. 

You are absolutely welcome to ignore any of this, it is after all your story, but I hope it might help you a bit or might give you some ideas. The idea sounds interesting, I look forward to hearing more of it. :)

Rex Publica first Brainstormi feedback appreciated

5 years ago

Wow,thanks first off for this huge answer!

Second your guess was correct indeed :)

I agree with you , that it's  smart to first just make the college storyline as a step to the whole story. I do think though that it might be actually more interesting to build up your own movement.Also thank you for the idea with the exams. Haven't really thought about it. Last but not least yeah you're absolutely right, i should reread my posts :D!

Rex Publica first Brainstormi feedback appreciated

5 years ago

Yes writing one branch at a time is easier.

Write it as if it's a linear story with the path that is most appeasing to you going first. After that add in another path and a few ending paths so it dosen't seem like that much while adding in a bit more.

Hope it has Gulags.

Rex Publica first Brainstormi feedback appreciated

5 years ago

Ok thanks for the advice! 

Moreover gulags are in although that could get gory and bloody (and arent the main focus,but I'm sure they could be incooperated.