Player Comments on Extinction of the Neanderthals
Interesting.
I found the storygame creative, and I liked how it was based on theories of evolution. I'll be honest, the writing wasn't exactly 10/10, but it was fleshed out well enough in my opinion. :)
There wasn't exactly a lot of detail, but there was enough for me to enjoy it. Since this is based on theories and the past, details would have been really good for this storygame.
It was pretty well written, but there was a lot of room for improvement. More detail would have been really nice, and character development was lacking a bit. The setting and plot, I liked.
There wasn't much emotion going on in this story, and it was hard for me to get a feel for the characters and try to relate to their emotion.
The pictures were a really good addition, because they helped me get more of a picture of what these things looked like when the writing didn't provide enough detail.
3/8, good job but not the best.
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MinnieKing
on 3/19/2017 8:00:30 PM with a score of 0
I'm going to assume that you put this in the Sci-Fi category because a lot of the events that take place are based on theories about early human evolution that haven't been definitively proven yet, but the way this game is structured and written makes it a better fit for the Edutainment category.
I did enjoy playing it, and you clearly did some research and found fitting pictures for each page. I appreciated how you allowed the reader to progress onto the next option without backtracking as well - that's something else that makes me feel like this is more an Edutainment game than a Sci-Fi one. There wasn't much written, but what's there is coherent, proofread, and gets the point across admirably.
If you're still interested in expanding this game, I would love to see more elaboration on how Neanderthals lived: their diet, community, how they hunted, both violent and nonviolent interactions with the invading Homo Sapiens, et cetera. It's definitely a very unique point of view, and could include a lot of educational theories about ancient flora and fauna as well as the beginnings of human civilization.
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the_quiller
on 3/2/2016 3:01:22 AM with a score of 0
This is quite a short game, it doesn't mean that it can't be done well, but a few pointers:
- This game should be in 'Edutainment' rather than 'Sci-Fi Adventure'.
- The sudden deaths feel quite unrealistic. I researched the subject of surviving in the wild for the story I just published, and I can say that spear fishing/grabbing mussels in the waters would be the more rational choice in general, as hunting large prey brings a very high risk of injury, unless you hunt in packs and are very skilled with a spear or bow.
- Also, the title gives away your whole story, we already know what will happen, making the story less intriguing.
My recommendation would be to polish this story and make it a bit more factual in terms of actually surviving in the wild. You don't have to end everything with 'you die', there are other ways to wrap up a particular path.
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Future
on 2/29/2016 9:34:11 AM with a score of 0
It's a very cool concept, but one which was executed poorly. It's very basic, writing is Simplistic, choices feel dull and non Impactful. A plot like this could make for w really cool story, but not this one 2/8, good enough to poop on.
(I only read this to waste time at work, and it's short).
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mrcrimsonclean
on 8/17/2024 12:00:38 PM with a score of 0
I got the official end pretty easily since the choices were fairly easy to scope out. If the educational material had been presented in a more engaging and less informative narrative I probably would have been less bored.
Fortunately it wasn’t very long either which helped with the overall rating. I would have preferred a more ice age driven narrative where you have to make a long journey with critical decisions about surivival than something that sounds like it came from a textbook but oh well.
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Axxius
on 4/12/2022 11:28:09 PM with a score of 0
it is fine at least you dont do it with a person
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— javier on 11/21/2019 5:30:04 PM with a score of 0
Too short
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DeondreHawk7
on 7/5/2019 12:54:19 AM with a score of 0
It's like... playing a history lesson... like hearing a lecture without much choice. ;)
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TestingJest
on 9/21/2017 11:36:45 PM with a score of 0
This was pretty interesting.
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crazygurl
on 6/14/2017 9:21:25 PM with a score of 0
this is really cool!!!!
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— The guy who loves this game! on 2/11/2017 8:13:31 PM with a score of 0
not much of a choise, is there?
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reader73
on 3/8/2016 9:03:11 PM with a score of 0
Definitely an Edutainment game and not Sci-Fi, but the story was well written and informative.
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Bucky
on 3/7/2016 10:00:29 PM with a score of 0
This was interesting, although Future is right, it's in the wrong category. I have no idea why you'd put in it Sci-Fi. Other than that it was too short and had no branching out effect, as every choice was continue or die. I found the actual writing and content very interesting and educating, though, and would enjoy reading something else by you.
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Steve24833
on 2/29/2016 12:38:41 PM with a score of 0
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