Player Comments on Uprise
10/10 would sleep again.
Besides that point, the story was...pretty mediocre, at best. Not that it wasn't good on its own, but there needed to be something...some more explanation to really allow the reader to grip onto what you're writing. With the lack of background content put into the story, it's mostly another walk-along the lane of more zombies, more biting people, more creatures, blegh.
Still, though, I'm looking forward to a longer extension of this. There is potential in the story, depending on where you're going with it.
on 6/4/2015 12:57:55 PM with a score of 0
Well, for your first CYS, it was decent. This will be my first review on the site, so I guess we are both new to this. There will be some spoilers here.
Pertaining to the length and age rating: I would say 4 and 5 respectively. It took me around 20 minutes most to finish and I noticed only a few swear words.
Plot and Story: It's your typical zombie apocalypse scenario. That's not a bad thing, but the genre is pretty saturated and you have to do something interesting to distinguish yourself from the rest, which I don't really think you do that here. You start off working at your poor paying job, and then your co-worker, Tom, randomly says they're here and collapses. Then, the world turns into chaos, except for the store that our character works at. Although the main character locks the doors, you would think people would be breaking in any way possible. Tom and yourself are pretty damn calm the whole time too, despite that Grammy got EATEN right in front of you and people are screaming outside. While the characters did show interaction with their environment, you would think they would be in a bit of a hurry devising a plan. What I'm trying to get at here is the story has some unrealistic elements that appear throughout the story, which is distracting to the reader(or me anyways). Also the story is too short to establish characters you want to, at least somewhat, care about. Which brings me to my next point. The characters didn't stand out. The one I found most interesting would be the girl with the Australian accent carrying the girl, but other than that, the characters were a blur.
Grammar and spelling: Spelling wise, I didn't find any errors. For some reason, I felt like there were too many hyphens, but I think that's just me.
Concluding thoughts: As I review my review, I find myself talking about negatives, but your story is adequate. I feel like if you made the characters both likable and have their actions realistic, while also extending the story, you have a good, solid, written piece of work. Keep writing, you'll only get better and better, Good luck! :)
on 6/4/2015 3:08:18 AM with a score of 0
I'm not sure if I beat the game or not. Weird ending - not safe. Grammatical errors make it hard to read too.
on 12/21/2016 1:26:33 PM with a score of 0
A fine and well-written story. Good for a first effort. The characters and plots are not interesting in my eyes though. But well done! ;)
on 6/6/2015 2:27:28 AM with a score of 0
Not bad at all. Short, I`d say, and the choices you make don`t...really...affect anything. Interesting though, really.
on 6/4/2015 5:12:35 PM with a score of 0
Pretty entertaining, I must say.
on 6/4/2015 4:18:56 PM with a score of 0
Great work, great writing :) I like the way that you went slow and explored the characters quite a bit, overall a pretty good reading experience :D
on 6/4/2015 2:22:38 AM with a score of 0
Pretty good story. If you're having trouble on deciding the maturity level, I'd go with a five, maybe a six.
on 6/4/2015 12:46:45 AM with a score of 0