The Make-Believe Sandbox

Player Rating5.85/8

"#72 overall, #2 for 2013"
based on 382 ratings since 04/12/2014
played 4,518 times (finished 260)

Story Difficulty2/8

"walk in the park"

Play Length4/8

"A well spent lunch break"

Maturity Level5/8

"aren't you a little too old to be trick or treating"
Some material may be inappropriate for persons under age 13. If this were a movie, it would probably be PG-13.

A story about the style of second love.

There are five possible endings to this game. Your score will effect your ending! Be mindful that this is my first storygame, so it probably won't be that good. Looking for constructive criticism in the comments section :3 Have fun!

~Haruhi Suzumiya

Thank you for all your comments (*^^*)

* Updated: Realized I made a ridiculous amount of errors in the storygame...probably still some left.

Player Comments

I'm really impressed with this game.

There are certain times when, in a storygame, I simply cannot find any errors, and the ones I do are very, very minor. This is one of those times.

By the end of the storygame, I had a heavy heart and played through the other endings, just to see what I could get.

The only thing I would point out as technically "bad" is the cliche plot of it. The memories, then death, like Snow, and a lot of other Romance/Dating games I can't remember. I feel as though this has been done to death, and it would be interesting to see a change.

The meaning and plot were powerful in this game, and I recommend it heavily.

5/8.
-- FazzTheMan on 10/14/2014 12:00:59 AM with a score of 7
I'm giving you a six. It was well done. The plot was good and the characters were pretty interesting as well. I felt that the boy was a bit more interesting than the girl though because of his past.(Which, actually, was pretty sad in a good way. It wasn't overly dramatic or emo and he actually had a good reason to be a little depressed). Also, nice use of pictures.

Some things that I think could have helped was the overall animeish themes. For example, when the girl lost her bikini at the beach. I thought to myself, "Oh come on." I'm not really upset with you but the whole genre who does this, it seems, EVERY anime or so. To me, it's just shameless nudity.

Overall, it was a good romance. I would just try to tighten up the dialogue(make it a bit more realistic) and try to cut down on the anime weirdness.

Good job.
-- JMgskills on 6/23/2013 10:14:23 AM with a score of 9
Very, very well done. I agree with what others have said; it's a beautiful story, like Snow and The Ocean's daughter. One comment to improve it though: proofread it one more time. There's a couple places where there are little mistakes that can take away from the otherwise wonderful story you've written. (one I remember in particular is using FOUR instead of FOR). That aside, it's a great game, and a fantastic job for your first storygame. I look forward to seeing what you will write in the future!
-- MagmaArmor0 on 6/15/2013 8:15:34 PM with a score of 8
So... is there even a good ending for this game? I mean if you choose your love to be your first love then she would be irreplaceable even if there is someone that totally looks and resembles like her, right?
-- TestingJest on 1/26/2018 12:23:58 AM with a score of 5
Touched my heart. Well done.
-- DiniTheWizard on 12/18/2017 8:49:50 AM with a score of 8
*literally crying*
-- TakisBoss on 12/10/2017 10:51:38 AM with a score of 10
*sigh* yet another story similar to snow.
Still, it was well written and good to see you have somewhat different endings.
-- crazygurl on 6/19/2017 3:24:30 PM with a score of 10
sad
-- itsyeboi980 on 5/26/2017 1:00:46 PM with a score of 7
sad
-- Daniel White on 11/11/2016 12:00:37 AM with a score of 9
a...amazing :3
-- Honeydusk842 on 5/4/2016 8:39:02 PM with a score of 7
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