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No! Don't leave! Seriously, I have been working FOR-EV-ER on this WC game and think that you guys (and gals) should check it out! It is NOT finished, but I hope you can enjoy what there is here. Please give me positive feedback and let me know what I could do to improve it even further. I HATE those WC games that are poorly done with no imagination. I have devoted most of my time making a GOOD WC game just to prove it can be done. Please give it a try and don't be a hater, please!

Thanks, I owe you one.

http://chooseyourstory.com/story/the-warriors-game-2~2e0 <----- Here it is.

Another misplaced post.. This belongs in the Parlor Room. 

Oh... I'm sorry. I'm not quite used to these forums yet. Mind moving this for me? (I don' know how...) -.-

Hey, it's okay, trust me I've made my share of mistakes as well. I myself can't move it, but a mod can.

Are there any on right now? (Not sure who the mods are) Wait what? Am I even talking right I don't know.... :(

There are not any mods on at the moment...

@Madglee could you help with this, perhaps?

@Madglue! Help us!

:( I'm such a noob to the site. I barely even know who the hell these people are. I know Kiel, CobaltBlaze, Malk, and Bluefur and that's about it...

Well, now I'm fairly offended. I should post more often if this is the kind of reputation I have.

I kind of know Madglee, but not really. 

@Madglee help me please?

*AHEM!* Have I not upheld my reputation as well? I know I haven't been on as much as usual, but come on!

Sorry sorry! I meant peple I talked to personally and are friends with online. f course I know who you two are! hehe. GTG now class is over..

I believe I'm currently the most likely to reply.

You can also try BerkaZerka.

Back. And I'm sorry if I offended anyone I just meant people I was "friends" with. I know you guys and while I consider you "semi-friends" you can't really be my "real" online "friends" until we actually interact in a casual fashion instead of me being an idiot who doesn't know shit about the server. -.-

For example: Bluefur and I interact constantly and know quite a bit about each other. 

But users like Malk (and you guys), well all I really know is what's on the user page (like being a shmuck in Canada with an obession over capybaras!)

Now can someone just please play the game already? >:I

There's a list of admin/mods that you could tag at the bottom of this page.

I went through it and it's okay. Much better then other warrior cat games already, in the way of grammar/spelling/plot. Plot can still use some work though.

Maybe some background info about the cat that you choose would be nice. Such as, why did the leader of shadeclan get picked for the job of looking for herbs instead of any other cat. Doesn't the leader of a clan have duties to attend to also?

It also needs details; lots and lots of details. And not as many paragraph spaces. Describe the setting, how everything looks. Is there grass? Does it look lush and smell sweet? Or is it dead and stale? Or is there no grass at all? Are there trees? What do the trees look like? Do they look menacing and loom above, or do they sway gently in the breeze? Are there other animals besides a rabbit and a mouse? Do they make sound? Are the hills snowy, grassy, jagged, foggy, lopsided, far off in the distance or relatively close, flat topped, or have some odd feature?

How is the cat feeling? Does hunger gnaw at her like a beast, or is it just a dull emptiness? Describe how she/he falls asleep before the dream. Is it a light sleep, or a deep sleep? Do her/his paws hurt walking the entire distance? Are there stones that bite into the paws and make them sore? Etc.

If you don't put in details, then it will distract the reader from the main point of the story, and not let them actually enjoy the story.

At the moment, I would rate the story a 2-3, mostly ignoring the lack of paths or endings since you are still working on it. .75 for correct spelling and grammar. You have no idea how much that gets on my nerves. 1 for a slightly promising plot start, though it could use maybe a bit more desperation that a background would provide saying why only one cat could go, how he/she was picked. .75 for the few details you have. Of course, this is a bit lower then normal because part of my rating system depends on how the author wraps up his story, but I'm not subtracting anything like I normally would if this were published.

Ummmm. The leader of the clan you choose is NOT yourself. They simply ask YOU (the character you play) to look for herbs for them while they stay with the clans and help. The reason only one leader appears is because the others are sick with the illness, but I haven't put that in yet...

And thank you TacocaT. Your feedback is greatly appreciated. I will certainly take your advice and add a truckload of more details. This is really only a rough outline of the real story right now. More details will be added to polish it up for publishing.