Hiding From Zombies

Really? You had to spell the word "knock" phonetically... as in "nok"? Not good. Not good.

[Shakes head at younglings who think spelling is someone else's problem and doesn't apply to them.]

Let's start with the positive shall we? This had quite an interesting premise- looking outside and realising that the zombie apocalypse is occurring.

However, I felt that this story was too linear, with one good ending (the only difference in the "positive" endings was the location) and a few death endings.

I felt that some of the choices didn't affect the story at all even though logically they should have. (*SPOILER*) For example, whether you received the shotgun from the neighbour or not, the game assumes that you did. Also, stealing the car made no difference to the story, which made me question why the choice was there. (*END OF SPOILER*)

There was a problem with discontinuity as well, as the story jumped from location to location- for example we were heading from the store to the mall (by the way what is the difference between the gun store and the mall? None it seems.) but suddenly we end up back in our neighbour's garden?

There was also a big problem with your grammar and spelling, which was really distracting, as well as an infinite loop in the mower scene.

Oh, and another thing- your story stops exactly when it starts to get interesting. (*SPOILER*) How does he make it to Canada or New York or wherever? Do they not encounter any zombies? Is a cure ever found? How did he meet this girl? (*END OF SPOILER*) The ending just seems so rushed and it really could have been fleshed out more.

Overall, you could have done better, as this was quite disappointing, but this is your first game so hopefully you'll improve with time. Next time at least use decent word processing software to prevent those spelling mistakes.

you really had to comment on your own game like we couldn't see it?

pathetic, absolutely pathetic

The first page was gold then it deteriorated and got kinda boring

also there is a page loop, you can get linked back to punching zombies at your door forever and ever

didn't finish and just clicked until I found an end game link

all my desire to read this story has been drained, I would suggest fixing it up and making it less boring

-OOoooooooOOoooOOh

I loved it