Player Comments on Anniversary

I got intrigued by the premise behind this before I started reading the story when the writer told us to lower our expectations and insisted that he needed to write something. Why? Is it a hostage situation? A choose your own adventure must be produced within a set time frame or someone’s goldfish is going to get executed Mafia style? Is someone’s gerbil about to be put in the blender if there is not a fully-written multiple-choice story by the end of the day? I might have been reading too much into this but I was intrigued.

We start off with some elementary-level Math, some kindergarten-level breakfast-making (for which I feel I was unfairly criticized for daring to be different and pouring the milk and cereal all over the table sans bowl), then I went to an anniversary festival (whatever the hell that is), got into a chair war with some old biddy, indulged in some random but weirdly disturbing psychological misogyny, smoke a joint (which is the thing that makes the most sense in the story), play MineCraft and become suicidal because of it, join the Cult of Zarabel and... that’s pretty much it. I knew it’d be different.

I think this falls into the lolrandom category of story and I’m wandering how closely the protagonist is based on the writer (I guess people will find out if they post a lot in the forums). If you go into it with suitably low expectations and toe that fine line between weary cynicism and hateful indifference I would say it’s pretty entertaining for a few minutes. On the other hand it has no branches, almost no plot or characters, a bland setting and even the humor you need to supply yourself. I dunno if this weird little story will survive long but I’ll give it a 3/8.

Duly pooped on.

I can’t tell if this is supposed to be ironic or if superteller is just retarded.

I mean it's not great, but it's really funny.

This made me laugh a lot for some reason...

Which depending on how you look at it, may not be a good thing. I have to wonder if that was the intent.

I'll just point out issues I found relatively in the order I found them in...

1. You started almost every sentence with "I" and the sentence structure was very repetitive at times. Though considering how self serving (and second hand aspieish) the protagonist is...it strangely works as a result.

2. There's a saying that any person can talk about divine concepts and make it sound interesting in the moment. But it takes real skill to talk about something mundane and make it sound special...or even divine for that matter. Its no wonder your deity ending ended up having more shock value than anything else. Well the police saying "I AM THE LAW" bordered on parody so hard that got a genuine laugh out of me!

There's probably more, but I'm sure everyone else has explained other flaws in your story already so me repeating those things would be a bit redundant.

I will say this...you protagonist is interesting despite not having much depth to him. Its a good example of how certain people think and I can actually see myself showing this game to irl friends in the future.

But really...why did you bother posting this if it wasn't finished and you had no time limit? Unless there was a time limit...in which case never mind this complaint...

Good enough "So bad its good" storygame that manages to actually not be super horrible and have a few good stuff in it. Routing could be more diverse and situations could have been fleshed out more yadda yadda...you get the point already...

5/8 and Cheers! ;) (Don't let the negative feedback discourage you btw! lol :P)

Why does this have a difficulty of 7/8? What is hard about it? It is just because it was hard to read?

I don’t like the city setting. Why did you contemplate all the different activities, but only allow the reader to choose one of two? Why did you put math in this thing? What if I don’t want milk in my cereal and I want to eat it dry? Why did you steal a chair and mess up the festival for those nice people?

Cool story, bro.

The author's description is spot on with this story. There is almost no story at all. I'm not too sure what the intent of writing this was, nor the inspiration. It is very linear and many choices are just added text flavor that all eventually lead to the same ~3 endings.

Based upon the authors description. I decided this story sucked. Upon clicking through it did seem to have choices, so it gets a 2 instead of a 1.