the late republic part one

This is a remarkable story game. I haven't seen Star Wars for several years but even I'm fairly sure Sith Lords don't get chewed out by "Sarge", have pals called Johnny who cry if they aren't allowed to join the Sith and regularly use guns and rocks in battle. This game has also introduced me to the word "diddin't" which is a masterpiece of misspelt but phonetically correct language. I don't mean to be harsh but I'm not sure writing is your forte, also I'm not sure if you've ever seen Star Wars.

Wow, umm.. the grammar was not very good. Then again, that in itself is the least glaringly offensive thing in this story, surprisingly.

terrible 1/8

..what is this....

What the hell is this bullcrap. Poorly done with no proper use of grammar.

Toooo short

This mess is barely readable. A lot of people on the site make the mistake of writing their dialogue like a script. You actually alternate between proper dialogue and a script-like format.

waiting for part two to come out

So I purposely killed myself as you completely lost me in the first page after I made my faction choice.

Johnny?....>WTF... Star Wars dude, how about you make up names, instead of useing real world names. Also, the Sith (or how about just enemy Troopers) can't be sith unless they use the darkside. The Sith are not a country or anything like that, they are a school of thought, like the Jedi, in fact the if there are no more Sith anymore as your intro suggests, the majority of there non force useing soldiers would have left...Non force using sith soldiers for the most part were brian washed by the dark side and there sith masters.

If your going to do SW fiction, do a little research first.

Too linear and full of punctuation errors. Needs editing