Cricket, The Apprentice Scrivener

Member Since


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10/20/2019 1:53 AM

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This year I plan to review at least a hundred and nine story-games and point more peeps from off-site to the magnificence that is the work of EndMaster.

You should stop reading my profile and go on to do better things like read Necromancer or Death Song.

2019 review count as of September 3: 71 









P.S. Please don't ask me to read stories that are soon to be unpublished.

There was a young man named Hill

Who thought live women quite shrill.

To the cemetery

He fled with heart merry,

 And went on to consume his fill.  


The sweet ambrosia did flow,

And with this dear Hill did show

That he was not sexist,

Nor very selective

In his choice of undead beau.  












Quotes, because I can:
"Well so far Cricket is my favorite new CYSer. She answers my questions, she pisses off other people, insists on being argumentative and most importantly she praises me."

"I'd be more disgusted by Cricket's ignorance, except she's only punishing herself and so the proper emotion is pity" --Mizal


"Cricket why do you know so much about echhi?" --Digit

"Cricket's a platinum ace. Any interest she shows in sex of any kind is strictly for ironic purposes, so its okay" --EndMaster

"Cricket is a tsundere asexual lesbian who likes cougers." --WIBN

"You're literally worse than a terrorist." -- Mizal

"I therefore infer that cricket is satan." --Someone Wise Beyond His Years

"Cricket, truly a daughter to be proud of." --EndMaster

Trophies Earned

Earning 100 Points Earning 500 Points Earning 1,000 Points Given by EndMaster on 04/03/2019 - To my only daughter, for going above and beyond with various tasks I assign. You have my thanks.


Sir Osis

It's about a time in the life of a knight named Sir Osis. There's a pony too

Winner of Sir Corgi's Lords of the Land contest.  Originally published April 14, 2019, but briefly unpublished for edits to the font and description.

This story is "Cave of Time" style. So just make use of that back button if you would like to see another path.  Please let me know what you thought of the story after you read it.  I appreciate comments.

"Sir Osis" is dedicated to my grandfather whom I never met.  Your granddaughter has an irreverent sense of humor.  

Special thanks to Ghost11 for the motivation, suggestion, and inspiration for one of the endings.  



The story of a noob who entered a writing contest.


Recent Posts

ah, the sweet innocence of childhood on 10/19/2019 10:09:58 PM
Risking making marks on the ceiling of a rental, smh

ah, the sweet innocence of childhood on 10/19/2019 9:54:34 PM
That got me too. I guess it cushions the ceiling a bit so you don't make marks? But then it wouldn't make mych sound either. Either way it is hilarious

ah, the sweet innocence of childhood on 10/19/2019 4:15:56 PM
I remember when I would visit my dad's mom. Usually I and maybe my brother would be left there for a while while my parents went off to do stuff. It wasn't until as I was typing this that I realized the reason for that. They had to go to the town my grandma lived on for legal stuff, and they couldn't just leave four year old me at home five hours away. Sometimes my cousin was there too. His mother was actually my cousin, but his mother was also my mom's age, and he was my age. So I just thought of him as my cousin. I think my grandma watched him every day while his parents were at work. So sometimes I would see his mom too. The roof of her house was like a barn, and there was an apartment above that someone else rented because my grandma was a greedy selfish landlady. In the backyard was a crowded shed. I didn't go out into the yard much when I was there, but I remember that. I also remember a tree with what I thought were cherries growing in her neighbors yard. They were probably ornamental crabapples or something. Regular sized cherry trees don't grow there. Inside the house was the living room, then the dining room, then the kitchen with it's pink accented linoleum floor and that one box of Captain Crunch cereal that always seemed to be there, then there was the basement. I don't remember what the basement looked like, but I remember pretty distinctly being told that the bed down there was a WATER bed, and I imagined that as being just a squishy sack of water like a water balloon. I think that was where my dad's other daughters stayed sometimes. Then back upstairs--I think you got there from the kitchen--was my grandma's bedroom, and the bathroom. You had to go through the bedroom to get to the bathroom, and I remember it being very quiet in there except for the sound of a loud clock ticking. The bathroom was small, and the handle on the faucet was that clear plastic kind that you have to pull up to turn on. It was hard for me to turn on then, and I remember being frustrated by that sometimes. The door handle was a glass knob, I think. It might have been porcelein though. I can't remember. The house had a smell I can't describe. It was partly old person smell, but there was a little bit more. It isn't too unpleasant. On the refrigerator were a bunch of souvenir magnets. Some of them my dad has in the garage now. They were from Florida, where she once visited us. She also had this stuffed moose that would rock back and forth with it's front hooves up and play "We Wish You a Merry Christmas" when I turned on a switch and hit a button. I can't hear an instrumental of that song without remembering that now. There were a few other stuffed animals. One was a white tiger from Florida that I now have, and another was a husky dog sitting up that seemed huge to me then. It was probably two feet tall. I think my cousin has that. I remember one time eating Spaghetti-Os in the dining room. Something about the combined smells along with an aversion to eating off other people's dishes made me not want to finish them. I still don't like eating off most people's dishes, but I feel bad about wasting food like that. When my parents came back, I remember my dad often talking to his mom about money and making sure she was doing all right with that. He had bought the house for her and took care of her. My grandma was partly deaf and legally blind by the time I knew her. She could see enough to read her ultra large print Bible with one of those lighted magnifying glasses that was always on the side table next to the couch though. I was a brat and often got impatient with her when she couldn't hear me. I really wish I could have known her when I was smart enough to appreciate her. She died a few days before I turned seven, of colon cancer I think. I remember visiting her in the hospital once, and I was in the basement of the home I lived in then when my sister, who was staying to take care of me and my brother while my parents were with my grandma, told me that she had died. I spent a lot of time after that still in her house, because my dad was changing out the carpet and my parents were repainting the interior so they could sell it. That was the first time I went to the upstairs apartment too. I found a Noah's ark puzzle there that I must have put together a dozen times. I think it was missing a piece though. So I never could really finish it. I also found a little booklet by Tide or some other laundry detergent brand that had how to remove various stains. I live near where she is buried now. It's where my mom's parents where supposed to be buried, but they ended up deciding they wanted to be by the lake. So we just had the plots all there and ready and in the town my grandma lived in. It's in a part of the cemetary usually reserved for veterans becuase of that. We still have a plot next to her that will come in handy someday, I am sure. She was buried in a lavender colored casket that I think was the same exact one my other grandma had. After the funeral, we went to one of my uncle's houses (or maybe it was a cousin. I honestly can't remember. I only see most of these people at weddings and funerals, and the former is rare when the only one's close enough to bother with are nearly all over fifty), and there were chihuahuas and parrots there. One of the parrots could say a few words. I think it was the grey one named Scooby.

Poll: Vault CYS on 10/17/2019 8:19:22 PM
I need to kick someone out of my bunker so I can have MHD and infinite doorways now, or, I know. She can make herself a room that way.

Contest:Battle in the Ruins of a Dead Civilization on 10/17/2019 11:27:35 AM

Ectocomp 2019 on 10/16/2019 11:28:25 PM
It's Spooky Fist time.

Poll: Vault CYS on 10/16/2019 11:27:46 PM
So glad I'm not in THAT bunker.

Poll: Vault CYS on 10/16/2019 5:38:40 PM
This is mesmerizing.

Ode to Boris on 10/16/2019 3:53:16 PM
Awwww, wholesome

Ode to Boris on 10/16/2019 3:51:17 PM
Thank you for Boris. My life has meaning again.