OriginalClamurai, The Reader

Member Since

7/7/2018

Last Activity

4/16/2019 5:19 PM

EXP Points

82

Post Count

152

Storygame Count

0

Duel Stats

212 wins / 240 losses

Order

Sage

Commendations

18

I am an aspiring writer and game developer.  I'm taking a quick break from working on my coding to get some practice with writing.  I'm very interested in developing works on different platforms.  I've already learned some of the unique challenges and opportunities of a choose your own adventure in the short amount of time that I've been on this site, so I'm excited to see where this will lead.

I'm interested in fiction, fantasy, sci-fi, and horror.  I'm very interested in the games on the site and I am hoping to have a contribution sometime this year, though real life can be quite demanding. 

Storygames

Open Your Heart
unpublished

How can one balance single parenthood with trying to find true love in today's age?  Can someone who has been through a toxic relationship learn to trust again?  Join Jacob and Lena, two middle-aged people diving into love, as they search, in one another, for their other half.

Can a man, who has lost the love of his life, find love again?  Can a woman, who has lost confidence in herself, rediscover what it is that makes her strong?  Control both sides as their hearts grow fonder and they learn what it means when you open your heart to a stranger.


Recent Posts

Looking for bad pick-up lines on 3/12/2019 1:52:47 PM
We would make a sweet fruit cocktail together. You bring the tail, I'll bring the [CENSORED].

Just a couple questions from a newbie on 3/9/2019 3:43:32 PM
Since it's your first, I would determine your goal: linear with variability or wildly different storylines. From there, I would recommend some sort of visualization to assist. My most recent (and first well-prepared) project involved a map in my notebook with key events. This let me balance out the amount of content much more easily since I had several main routes towards an objective.

Minimum Page Count on 3/7/2019 9:35:21 PM
Interesting, was not aware there was a hard stop on there.

Minimum Page Count on 3/7/2019 9:24:35 PM
I'm sure I could post a single page story that met minimum standards. Just write your story and just focus on quality rather than metrics.

100 word story on 3/4/2019 10:09:56 PM
The first draft was campy and humorous. The second was horrifying and disturbing. The final I dialed back a little to give the reader room to move.

The Cystia Roll of Honour on 3/3/2019 9:47:14 PM
I exist in the post, therefore I approve.

Innocence Lost is finished!!! ... Kind of. on 3/2/2019 7:52:35 PM
Could make a default set of values that is changed by the code that gets input, if the following game is flexible enough for that. It'd be useful for people who didn't keep that code. If it's not flexible enough, then one giant game would be my recommendation.

100 word story on 3/2/2019 7:31:36 PM
The ambulance speeds down the road. "Damn it, hang in there!" the paramedic yells. The pulse stops. He beats on the still body, desperately trying to revive. One beep, then another. A sigh of relief. "Found him," the EMT says, showing the paramedic the chart. All of his info with a big, red heart. "Oh, thank God," the paramedic says, sighing. He clamps his hand over the man's mouth and nose, who begins to drown in his own blood. He makes a call. "Good news! Your son is going to make it to his next birthday. We found a match."

21 word story time on 3/1/2019 1:22:09 AM
You pierce his body with the trocar. Preparing a body is a messy affair. At least he would be dead soon!

21 word story time on 2/28/2019 11:55:13 PM
I liked the premise of this tiny story. The first half didn't build the suspense nearly as much as the second half, so it's more of a slow burn. I think I would have rearranged certain elements, perhaps describing the breathing before the realization of being followed. This would allow your narration to build the tension upon itself more. "I hear breathing. Something is following me." seems to increment the suspense a little more strongly. I did like your use of the cell phone to add a sense of immediacy to the desperate circumstances, as well. Your narration plants me firmly into the head of the protagonist and the short, blunt series of observations implicitly describes the state of mind that the character is experiencing well. Well done. I enjoyed this, especially as I read it over and over during my response, discovering more elements that were well crafted and placed each time.