, #63 for
played 4,222 times (finished 223)
"run through the jungle"
"So short yo' momma thought it was a recipe"
"choking hazard for children under 4"
Contains content that may not be suitable for persons under age 6. To compare to the movie rating system, this would be G.
This is a game where you choose if you go to college, what job you want, if you are going to get a significant other ,and how hard you work. There is no certain gender in this game. You can be a girl or boy if you want. I hope that makes sense. Anyways, will you succeed? This is only my second game, my first game wasn't a hit. But I'm trying again! Thanks for playing!(:
I'd like to say I enjoyed myself, but this may have been the worst story i've read in a while.
Ok, listen, I understand the occasional "your," and "you're," screw up and maybe a few misspelled words throughout a storygame, but the grammar in this was horrible. Come on, did you even try? There was even a link that had an exclamation mark, with a comma and a space before it. Grammar matters.
Also, you screwed up with the branching. In one path, you can barely try, but somehow you still end up having a ton of money. Many paths led to the same ending.
Transitions were choppy, and sloppy. Neither of those words are good, as silly as they sound when used in a sentence together. You were pretty much saying a sentence, then somehow leap to another sentence with almost no relation to the other. That's not how you write a good storygame. It makes it very linear.
Character development was almost nonexistant. Work harder on your plot, branching, spelling, characters, and effort.
on 5/10/2017 9:16:27 PM with a score of 0
Honestly this is the most rushed story I have ever read. There is little to no description on any of the characters. If you choose to ignore your feelings while in college on the first outing with the opposite sex, you end up lonely for the rest of your life and the two of you never hangout again. Really shouldn't the main character be focused on college. Shouldn't they have had that option later after hanging out a few times.
Then if you choose to confess you feelings you're married after 6 months. You could be marrying a horrible person. Everyone who has been in a relationship knows that people are good at pretending they are something their not for at least a year. There is also no story on the relationship at all. They kiss, then 6 months later you propose, you get married, you have a child the end.
on 10/4/2018 9:59:01 AM with a score of 0
Decent, but much too short.
on 5/21/2018 7:26:05 PM with a score of 0
needs slightly longer track and items
-- tyree on 4/19/2018 1:56:10 PM with a score of 0
-- billy on 3/16/2018 9:41:21 PM with a score of 0
on 4/24/2017 3:38:46 PM with a score of 0
Cute, short story.
on 1/23/2017 6:28:44 PM with a score of 0
its strangely short but its a good time waster
-- Feromount on 1/19/2017 6:14:39 PM with a score of 0
Cool, should be longer
on 11/28/2016 7:40:54 PM with a score of 0
That was really short.
on 7/15/2016 11:12:00 AM with a score of 0
Show All Comments
Help & Info
Who Is Online
110 guests and
version 20200002 | ChooseYourStory © 2001 - 2020, Halogen Studios Entertainment |