Pam Meets Steve
Love & Dating
"Too few ratings to be ranked"
played times (finished )
"no possible way to lose"
"So short yo' momma thought it was a recipe"
"I'll need to see some identification"
Some material may be inappropriate for persons under age 16. If this were a movie, it would probably between PG-13 and R.
Based Off A True Story
Happy Valentines Day Pam
It met the standards, few mistakes, semi-interesting, yet original, plot, and easy to read, only problem is the lack of choices and the obvious responses from said choices.
on 7/31/2015 5:49:21 AM with a score of 0
Well. think I shall post my analogy here.
As I like to say, a good storygame is a penguin...
It has bones, the structure, the plot.
It has flesh, it has descriptions, it has details, and also emotions.
It has a sleek outer skin, good looking writing, grammar, punctuation and spelling, fancy or grabbing start.
It has a brain, variables, items(if applicable, not all penguins need to be smart!), link restrictions, and perhaps score.
It has a mouth and a**hole, the capability to be changed, removing crappy parts and digesting suggestions and improvements.
I believe that your should add some more backstory. Look, when you just jump in to a story, the reader feels disconnected. You immediately expose the reader to a scene in which he/she has no thoughts about, and is really abrupt. That would be the bones. The flesh: There were some details that you have, but put emotions, make the reader feel conflicted, or sympathize.
The writing was decent, and there were no major grammatical errors that I noticed.
The brain: choices, it's evident that the author wants the reader to go on a specific path, which can be good, but isn't really what the CYOA is about. Choices has to matter, this makes the reader feel that they are actually controlling the character, feeling that their choices actually matter.
Well, keep up the good work, good luck on further stories!
on 11/19/2020 10:01:56 AM with a score of 0
A nice, short story. I think you could do a lot more with it though. Also, what happened with the old boyfriend? If you choose to stay with Steve, it tells you that your boyfriend will be mad. But what does he actually do?
on 1/19/2020 5:37:20 PM with a score of 0
The ending wasn't solid. The story also contradicts itself.
on 3/5/2017 4:12:45 PM with a score of 0
I Like the "Real Ending" an ok game but I wish it was a bit longer
on 4/19/2015 2:01:44 PM with a score of 0
It was okay
on 3/29/2015 6:44:07 PM with a score of 0
I didn't think it had much of a love story vibe!
on 1/27/2015 8:28:42 AM with a score of 0
on 9/13/2014 8:37:28 AM with a score of 0
I loved this
-- Kna on 10/28/2013 8:49:00 PM with a score of 0
I would have liked some indication on why boyfriend B was better than boyfriend A, like was he more attractive, or nicer? Good story over all though
on 8/22/2013 12:09:27 AM with a score of 0
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