The Hammer, The Eagle, and The Pig

Player Rating3.72/8

"Too few ratings to be ranked"
based on 22 ratings since
played times (finished )

Story Difficulty2/8

"walk in the park"

Play Length4/8

"A well spent lunch break"

Maturity Level6/8

"I'll need to see some identification"
Some material may be inappropriate for persons under age 16. If this were a movie, it would probably between PG-13 and R.

Author's Note: This is my first storygame, written and published for the January 2017 New Frontier contest. It remains very much unfinished and I will unpublish it as son as I can. However, I hope you appreciate all that I have written thus far.

“[…] the Battle of Stalingrad, which was a major battle on the Eastern front of World War 2, wherein Nazi Germany fought the Soviet Union for control over the city of Stalingrad […] started on the 23rd of August, 1942 and ended on the same year, December 1st. […] The Battle of Stalingrad was the second bloodiest battle of World War 2, behind the Siege of London in 1962 […] considerable gains by the Germans in mid-November prompted General Zhukov to spring Operation Uranus, which focused attacks on the weakened flanks of the Axis armies […] although successful initially, Ronanian commander Petre Dumitrescu managed to fight off the Soviet advance into a stalemate, delaying the Soviets and allowing the Nazis to prepare for the second wave of attacks, which occurred on November 20th […] the Nazis used Dumitrescu’s bought time to bolster their Romanian flanks with anti-tank guns in preparation for the second wave of attacks, allowing the Romanians to hold onto their positions and not allow the Soviets to advance into the nearby town of Kalach […] On December 1st the Soviets retreated after heavy losses, leaving the Nazis as victors. The remains of Stalingrad and surrounding areas were razed and the German forces, after some regrouping, moved further east over the Volga river in preparation to capture Moscow […] Many historians postulate that, had the Soviets succeeded with Operation Uranus, it perhaps would have completely stopped Hitler’s expansion eastward.”

-- Excerpt taken from Canadian high school history textbook, circa 1970

“Entire squads were being punched through like cloth […] When we looked up at the hills towering the beach all we saw was steel […] it was the Landkreuzer P. 1000, a Heinie superweapon, the largest bloody tank known to mankind. 200 or so feet in length, fifty feet wide or some. Our armor couldn’t make it past the beach, and we couldn’t either, we just got blasted by these huge ass guns. It was chaotic. A massacre. I still remember the confusion. Torn and broken bodies face down on the beach, most of the poor fools not makin it a few feet. Normandy was a disastrous failure, and you can blame the Americans and their flawed strategies for it.."

-- Excerpt taken from interview with British veteran, circa 1944

“Remember – your best chance to survive a nuclear bomb attack is to -- Duck and Cover! […] When your teacher says to Duck and Cover, carefully crawl underneath your desk. Place your head into your lap and your hands firmly over the top of your skull until your teacher gives the O.K. signal […] Although the possibility of the enemy [pictured below is a drawing of Adolf Hitler] sending nuclear devices to your city is probably somewhat worrisome, you can stay safe by Ducking and Covering!”

-- Excerpt taken from American school poster, circa 2001

 

Player Comments

The writing was good! I thought that the author did an excellent job of capturing the complicated emotions implicit in a sophisticated father-son relationship. This story has the potential to be rather interesting if it expounds on that relationship and tests the protagonist by further involving his complicated conundrum of priorities: prove to father that he is a man, and stop father from treating his mother and sister so poorly.

This story is woefully incomplete and utterly linear, as is. It's not a storygame -- it's an unfinished piece of linear fiction and the author should not feel proud of this material as is. While the writing is good and the potential is there, it is not an impressive endeavor at the moment and a great deal of work should be done to finish the story.

All in all, this is an interesting start to a first endeavor and I definitely see the potential for greatness, but it until at least two paths have been finished (currently none are), I am unable to say anything except that this is a poor showing.
-- JJJ-thebanisher on 2/4/2017 2:43:07 AM
Dayummm...

It appears I have found a new CYS gem, though it's unfinished. It also appears my wish has come true: a great World War storygame! So anyway, yes, Fazz, I DID appreciate your progress on this so far, and so far it's better than Reeses' Cups.

7/8
-- AgentX on 2/3/2017 8:40:12 PM
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