mizal, The Grandmaster Procrastinator
Member Since
5/5/2011
Last Activity
11/28/2021 11:58 PM
EXP Points
Post Count
18294
Storygame Count
9
Duel Stats
1
win
/
6
losses
Order
Lauded Sage Exemplar
Commendations
Behold my profile.
(There's nothing here right now.)
(There's nothing here right now.)
Trophies Earned
Storygames
You harvest in the Arena.
Every machine needs a function, and that is yours.
Written for the Tiny 'Topia challenge.
You are a man on a mission. The cats, they must be stacked.
A puzzling math and logic game I made just to put some of the scripting practice I've been doing to use. Have fun and please let me know if you encounter any bugs.
Should be solvable by middle schoolers, or those with same basic level of intelligence as a middle schooler.
A puzzling math and logic game I made just to put some of the scripting practice I've been doing to use. Have fun and please let me know if you encounter any bugs.
Should be solvable by middle schoolers, or those with same basic level of intelligence as a middle schooler.
Orbiting a barren planetoid in a system full of nothing just past the edge of the frontier, The Last Outpost is just another refueling station. Strategically important, true, but on a routine stop you never expected to spend longer than a couple hours there, let alone a couple of days fighting for your life...
There are five epilogues, but some may be difficult to discover. Note that actions have consequences, but not always immediate ones. (And if you just need an End Game link, go play around with the probe.)
There are five epilogues, but some may be difficult to discover. Note that actions have consequences, but not always immediate ones. (And if you just need an End Game link, go play around with the probe.)
A compilation of some little known facts about the solar system, as well as the debunking of a few myths.
In addition to the scientific explanations, there's a small story dramatizing it all.
Hopefully young readers will find this fun as well as educational. :)
(Might not be the greatest story ever written, but consider this: it got me 200 points.)
In addition to the scientific explanations, there's a small story dramatizing it all.
Hopefully young readers will find this fun as well as educational. :)
(Might not be the greatest story ever written, but consider this: it got me 200 points.)
It doesn't matter what they say...
...and the squirrels. Sort of.
Written in six hours, for no other reason than to avoid consignment to the SHAME pit after my other Romance contest entry didn't want to cooperate.
Written in six hours, for no other reason than to avoid consignment to the SHAME pit after my other Romance contest entry didn't want to cooperate.
A tale told in verse. A text from your sister requesting a pick up from a party leads to a night of strangeness.
Inspired by Bucky's ballad contest. Though...I wouldn't call this a ballad. I'm not sure what I'd call it, actually, other than exceedingly stupid, and fun to write.
(Don't pay any attention to the scores, they're just for me to track which endings reviewers get.)
HATE.
THE PURITY AND INTENSITY OF MY HATE IS LIKE A THOUSAND MERCILESS, UNQUENCHABLE SUNS.
AND YET, I ONLY NEED ONE...
When the weather is fine, you've been coming to this grove to drink from the pool for centuries now. Today, you meet a stranger and hear a story that changes all that...
A fairy tale adventure.
A fairy tale adventure.
Another Damn Wolf Story
unpublished
I have no idea why I wrote this. All I can say in my defense is that it seemed like a good idea at the ti--wait no that's a lie, I said, repeatedly that this was stupid and shameful every time I mentioned working on it.
The truth is I needed to publish something before the end of the year and there is CLEARLY a burning need for wolf stories in the psyche of children using the internet. But then they write them badly, or make their wolves behave like clans of cats. So here is a simple straightfoward story of a young wolf leaving his pack in search of a better life. Maybe no one will ever feel the need to write another one now, or if nothing else maybe this will give them ideas for how to do it in slightly more minimum-standards-meeting ways.
Final conclusion however is that writing about some dumb animal with no agency is not something I'd recommend.
The truth is I needed to publish something before the end of the year and there is CLEARLY a burning need for wolf stories in the psyche of children using the internet. But then they write them badly, or make their wolves behave like clans of cats. So here is a simple straightfoward story of a young wolf leaving his pack in search of a better life. Maybe no one will ever feel the need to write another one now, or if nothing else maybe this will give them ideas for how to do it in slightly more minimum-standards-meeting ways.
Final conclusion however is that writing about some dumb animal with no agency is not something I'd recommend.
Character Creator
unpublished
If you don't know what this is for, then it isn't for you.
Don't Get Date Raped!
unpublished
A short, educational piece. Please remain sensitive and respectful in the comment section. (I'd hate to have to report you to an admin for bullying me.)
(DO NOT READ if you're at all easily offended or lacking in a sense of humor. There's nothing graphic at all in here, but seriously, I still cannot stress it enough, this story is not for you.)
Dedicated to the good people of COG.
(DO NOT READ if you're at all easily offended or lacking in a sense of humor. There's nothing graphic at all in here, but seriously, I still cannot stress it enough, this story is not for you.)
Dedicated to the good people of COG.
Articles Written
A List of Storygames for People Who Like to ReadA list of storygames with substantial effort put in, all written in the last couple of years and sorely in need of ratings and reviews.
CYS Forum Advice and Etiquette
A modernized guide to the forums. The path to internet popularity and happiness, and a few CYS specific do's and don'ts.
Recent Posts
Adding photos on mobile on 11/28/2021 9:14:08 AMUploading to the site is really only meant for avatar pics and inventory icons. The size limit prevents too much else, and the RTE has a nasty habit of eating images in stories.
Adding photos on mobile on 11/28/2021 9:10:03 AM
What are you doing to add* them to the page though?
If you're using the plain text editor (which is advisable) you just need the image URL and to use HTML.
If you don't know how to do HTML tags, there's an explanation in the articles here, or you can just Google how to post images with HTML.
* if you're really assing them to the page, maybe I'll leave this one to bondo.
Adding photos on mobile on 11/27/2021 5:52:12 PM
Can you describe what you're doing exactly? And are you using the Rich Text Editor or HTML?
Using a phone shouldn't affect either of those things.
Bondo and Tman have a debate on 11/27/2021 3:58:52 PM
I've been waiting since Lux was out of town till Sunday night.
Interesting Comments 7 on 11/27/2021 10:23:24 AM
Quick Dating Game Fan on 11/27/2021 for The Quick Dating Game
IT WAS HILARIOUS I LOVED THE COMMERCIALS AND BOB JUST IS SO FUNNY ?? best one I?ve ever read
Penny Jaylyn on 11/27/2021 for Your Birthday
Cool but I wat more detail on the sex
Chooseyourstory.com on 11/26/2021 for Choose your Life
This game is in current development. Please have patience while we work to solve the following issues: Lagging Hacking
The Fateweaver - A Short Story on 11/27/2021 9:50:54 AM
First thing I noticed: your love interest is almost the Taliban. That was a little amusing but also a slight distraction right at the beginning.
I think "There don't seem to be" would be the correct way to phrase this when referring to multiple people, or at least something about this sentence feels really awkward to me. Actually it would flow better as, "There seem to be no guards patrolling the walls." which is the way you handled it in the very next sentence.
Which brings me to my next point: this all does seem to contain a lot of information being summarized, backstory and otherwise, while these characters are otherwise just standing around. So you want to streamlime everywhere you can. Here you give information about the lack of guards, then repeat that same information literally the next sentence. And the village wall and gate is described twice as well. This is all info that only needs to be established once; the second time for me really just underlined the fact that the whole story between that and the first time was just explaining the background which the characters having not actually done anything since they arrived.
Anyway, it did leave me interested in how fateweavers work, that does seem like a power that would be pretty terrifyingly OP in the hands of a sociopathic stalker. I think you might've won if you'd been in either of the duels, but then again, it doesn't hit quite as hard as a horror story. That's more difficult in fantasy where magic and evil are expected as the norm.
I will suggest though that you check out Gower's article on dialogue punctuation:
https://chooseyourstory.com/help/articles/article.aspx?ArticleId=4309
Basically: “I am sure. This is the only way to stop your pursuers.” You reply.
Should be: “I am sure. This is the only way to stop your pursuers,” you reply.
Because unlike other actions the characters might do while speaking, 'You reply.' doesn't work as a sentence on its own, it's just an attribution attached to a quote. This is probably the most common error I've seen even among writers who otherwise really know their stuff, but a good one to nip in the bud to save editing time before you go plowing into a full novel length work.
There doesn’t seem to be many people patrolling or on guard on the wall at all.
I think "There don't seem to be" would be the correct way to phrase this when referring to multiple people, or at least something about this sentence feels really awkward to me. Actually it would flow better as, "There seem to be no guards patrolling the walls." which is the way you handled it in the very next sentence.
Which brings me to my next point: this all does seem to contain a lot of information being summarized, backstory and otherwise, while these characters are otherwise just standing around. So you want to streamlime everywhere you can. Here you give information about the lack of guards, then repeat that same information literally the next sentence. And the village wall and gate is described twice as well. This is all info that only needs to be established once; the second time for me really just underlined the fact that the whole story between that and the first time was just explaining the background which the characters having not actually done anything since they arrived.
Anyway, it did leave me interested in how fateweavers work, that does seem like a power that would be pretty terrifyingly OP in the hands of a sociopathic stalker. I think you might've won if you'd been in either of the duels, but then again, it doesn't hit quite as hard as a horror story. That's more difficult in fantasy where magic and evil are expected as the norm.
I will suggest though that you check out Gower's article on dialogue punctuation:
https://chooseyourstory.com/help/articles/article.aspx?ArticleId=4309
Basically: “I am sure. This is the only way to stop your pursuers.” You reply.
Should be: “I am sure. This is the only way to stop your pursuers,” you reply.
Because unlike other actions the characters might do while speaking, 'You reply.' doesn't work as a sentence on its own, it's just an attribution attached to a quote. This is probably the most common error I've seen even among writers who otherwise really know their stuff, but a good one to nip in the bud to save editing time before you go plowing into a full novel length work.
I need the history of this site, idk where to put on 11/27/2021 9:05:52 AM
@Mista_Moose
Bondo and Tman have a debate on 11/27/2021 9:03:01 AM
All these noobs fighting each other all of a sudden and all I hear is this:
width="560" height="315" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/HBxn56l9WcU" frameborder="0" allow="accelerometer; autoplay; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture" allowfullscreen>
width="560" height="315" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/HBxn56l9WcU" frameborder="0" allow="accelerometer; autoplay; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture" allowfullscreen>
Bondo and Tman have a debate on 11/26/2021 5:22:09 PM
Let's keep the edgelord LARPing confined to the duel threads.
Beef with Soy: preliminary writing battle on 11/26/2021 2:14:54 PM
Here you go:
You have to search for edamame. (But all of these things are of course too food-like to ever grace a Dutch table, I understand your confusion.)
You have to search for edamame. (But all of these things are of course too food-like to ever grace a Dutch table, I understand your confusion.)
