Player Comments on Priesthood

I have not read many stories on this site, so I cannot really compare this to anything else.
However, I was asked to read and comment, and so I shall.
I see that many others have rated this highly, with enthusiastic praise, and I am sorry, but I am unable to give such a glowing recommendation.
The writing is very sloppy, with many spelling mistakes and little care for grammar or sentence structure.
There seems to be an attempt on your part to use a large, complex vocabulary, however "vestigeal" is not a word, and if you meant "vestigial" then you have used it incorrectly.
I do not find the story particularly original or unique, but you do seem to have made an effort.
Are you a child? In that case, I would give you high marks for the attempt.
Overall, it is the writing of someone who has been told by others that they possess skill, but not someone who has consistently honed their craf

Whenever I am being too hard on myself, I like to read things like this.

I'm sure there's a story here somewhere. I'm sure, if you took away all the grammar mistakes, all the punctuation mistakes, all the capitilization mistakes, there's a story here worth reading.

Or not.

2/8

I am far too trusting

This was a good story Descriptive and engaging. It is let down slightly by poor SPG (spelling, punctuation and grammer). All in all a decent short story.

Boring, short, bad grammar and awful.

Eh, this one I was disappointed with. It seemed a bit of a stretch. Helpful hint, try copying and pasting your story into a Word document before submitting. Hope to see more from you, especially more random adventures! :D

so so

Okay.

It's pretty good, needs a little work though; the capitalization is a bit iffy, and also, it's "vows", not "vowels".
With a little practice, you could be great.

Not bad for a short little story, could fix the grammar and spelling though.

This story blows your other one away!! Even though I had no choice but to kill the priest, I thought the story the story was well written and the choices were well thought out. BRAVO!!!!!

It's ok.

Great story!

It had an intresting plot line, but many gramatical and punctual errors

I must say Thank you to MirrorMask for Doing IMO the best review I have ever gotten.

Yeah... forgot the "register first" part. So I just did. XD

Still epic. I died :D

-bla

Hey Jimson! No idea what you were so worried about... I thought it was excellent... I rated you an 8! It was really interesting... I am sorely tempted to redo it to see other possible outcomes! :P

-Blables :D

this needs to be finished up a bit and polished. paragraphing and flow of text could be worked on some. HOWEVER, great start and should be built upon.

Well, Jimson, I took your advice and read this story. As I expected it was very unique and well-written story. I believe you did great. It was a nice length with a good amount of story per page.
It would be a good idea to read over and check for errors if you write to catch any spelling and grammar errors you could have made. Although I'm not that picky, some other people like to point things out even if they see only 1 or 2 misspelled words.
But this was an excellent story, so good job, and I hope to see more creative ideas like that in the future.

Excellantly written and has a highly original plot. (Somthing which you don't find often nowadays)

It could do with a proof-read for a few SPG errors, but nothing major.

A solid piece of fiction which I thoroughly enjoyed.

Definitely could use a proof-read. That's a big thing. However it was a fun story with a decent plot-line. I love how original it was, (not just another zombie game) and the writing vocab was good. The ending was pretty cool too.

Lol, Most of what you read here isn't supposed to be there, like the Hehe Package That was a joke I threw in so I wouldn't get bored with being so serious, as you can tell from my other stories, Thats not me :P lol

Work on paragraphing
But nice amount of text per page and I like your plotline
remember, no jokes in the link (package hehe package)
Anyways, unpublish this and continue.