The Mysterious House

a Horror by Lyndy

Player Rating2.76/8

"#865 overall, #105 for 2014"
based on 84 ratings since 07/11/2014
played 545 times (finished 89)

Story Difficulty2/8

"walk in the park"

Play Length2/8

"So short yo' momma thought it was a recipe"

Maturity Level1/8

"appropriate for all ages"
Stories with this maturity level will not, by design, have any potentially objectionable content. An example of a type story with this rating would be a quiz on mathematics.

Tags

Hannah is attracted to her house on her way home from tuition one night! She saw a small house with a glowing light in one window. As she peeped on her toes through the window, she realised that it was a light on a lamp. An open book lay on a table. Hannah would like to explore the house? Would you help her?

Player Comments

Agreed with Tanstaafl, it wasn't terrible or anything. I think the author is pretty young, but they seem to have a basic grasp of grammar and punctuation at least...maybe this is a little sad, but yes, I now consider it a red-letter day on CYS when a writer knows how sentences work.

It definitely needs more detail though, right now it falls pretty hard into the trap of telling, not showing. 'Hannah realizes this' 'Hannah decides that' and etc.

Also for the sake of realism I have to ask, what kind of person walks by a strange house, sees the window is open and immediately decides to climb inside?

A person about to get a well-deserved shotgun blast to the face, that's who. Dumb bitch is lucky she only had to deal with a ghost since ghosts can't pull triggers.
-- mizal on 7/11/2014 11:02:43 AM with a score of 0
The story was kind of mundane and suddenly had a lot of info at the story's end. Have you thought about maybe having that part as decision-making too? I feel it would help this story to receive higher ratings. Just sayin'.
-- Quorrah on 7/14/2019 1:16:27 PM with a score of 0
Bit short...
-- Geordie on 4/2/2019 8:10:05 AM with a score of 0
Nice story. Cool haunted house. Thanks for writing this story.
-- PaulaAnneMason on 11/11/2018 9:48:47 AM with a score of 0
The details were lacking in some parts, but when they weren't they made for an interesting story. It needs better choices however. At parts the only good decision available leads to the quickest and most disappointing ending. Also, some very random moments.
-- Troppy on 6/17/2017 4:14:20 PM with a score of 0
A pretty interesting plot, but lacks depth. Still good though. :)
-- agarii on 5/9/2017 3:23:25 AM with a score of 0
Good Game
-- Alexus on 12/31/2016 9:25:54 PM with a score of 0
Much better than I expected. It's a little short; however, all in all, it definitely has potential.
-- Addison on 7/23/2016 4:37:41 PM with a score of 0
Too short but still interesting-Joe
Interesting but I wish there was more to it-Bob
-- Bob and Joe on 1/28/2016 4:03:52 PM with a score of 0
This was good for a short story. It could be longer and more descriptive. A decent effort
-- Jordi P on 10/6/2014 12:17:45 PM with a score of 0
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