Player Comments on Wolf Spirit

This storygame is the best! The plot is really detailed and creative. I wish there was a sequel!

Great

This story made me cry and i could not stop. I loved how "spirit Wolf" saved her and how Macey was friends with her the hole time. The only part that was a little weird was that he happens to ask her to marry him right when she was talking about that with her mom. Other then that the story was grate.

I loved this game so much and I've finally found it again. It's... amazing.

#BestEndingBiatch

Pretty good, and a definitely enjoyable game. The "Trickula" thing pissed me off, though. You can definitely tell it's a contest game, as the author seemed to be really trying.

On the whole, the premise didn't make a lot of sense; the Wolf Spirit said that "Heaven is for the departed not the entwined" and that she was "good enough for one more conversation"....

But she can talk to me on the wedding?

Also, it makes little to no sense that Conor would propose after a few days of knowing me. It felt like the author was trying to accelerate the natural flow of things.

Furthermore, Wysteria felt sadly underdeveloped. Actually, so did most of the characters. At the end of the story, we had no idea what the characters were like.

Give us the "weather", not the "climate". We want the long term personality, as opposed to individual emotional states.

Also the censorship on swear words was annoying. The symbols are just jarring. I recommend using an aster*sk.

All in all, not the best, but certainly not the worst. :P

The story starts up in a promising manner, but lacks quality towards the end... After the whole "Macey" storyline, the situations start happening too fast, actions seen unnatural and scripted and things become too easy for the protagonist... Also, SPOILER ALERT, Connor and Kristi take love at first sight to a whole new level...

T'is a shame, I really liked the beggining of the story and I think that you could achieve more by giving events more time to unfold.

I loved it

Are you making a second one this is like best story ever!

That was way more story than game. I thought the pages were too long.

This is quite the story we have here! I got a fair sum of enjoyment out of it, but not as much as I should have.

There are several points that broke immersion for me, which is a shame because I missed out on some of the experience. There were parts, like the sudden inclusion of scientists and blood tests, that seemed terribly out of place. What I'm most impressed with though is the length of the story! Which probably made proof reading tiresome.

Lines like, "Instinctively, without thinking at all" and "No hair covers his head; it is bare bald" are redundant. something else to point out is recurring grammar errors like these, "'Careful, Jacob,' a voice warn.," "You feels your cheeks start to burn and...," and "the sun beat down on you."

For the most part though your writing is good. Here is an example of something else you can work on. All too often I see this, "After what seemed like (X units of time)." Find more creative ways to express that idea, it's obvious you can do it by what you've produced here.

This is something that bothered me, who is Trickula? Whisteria gave me the knife, I haven't been introduced to this Trickula before. This happens in the third paragraph of the page entitled, "The Cave."

Splendid story!

It's fun I got the best ending.

I got the Best Ending but.....it's a cliffhanger. The Wolf Spirit is back but it's the end already. D:

I was cursing myself all throughout the story, I didn't want Macey(The wolf Macey, not Sheela.) to die, and I tried every possible choice, but Macey always died. Then, I was even more heartbroken when Macey came back as Wolf Spirit, and ended up dying then, too. I was going to cry when the ending came, as Wolf Spirit/Macey never came back, but then, I got the best ending, with Wolf Spirit/Macey coming back! :D Congratulations on this story! It has minor grammar and spelling issues, but it was amazingly long, had a compelling story, and a fantastic ending. :)

This was truly amazing, I loved reading it and following the story. I would love to see more of this story with their lives or going on another epic journey. Thanks for making this.

Like a huge castle writing but what you mentioned earlier about linear choices; didn't count much because it was certainly little better than 'Ocean's Daughter'.

Nice

i got married and i have the best ending whoo!!!!!!

i got the near best ending :)
story was great, although very linear. <3
look forward to pt.2

pretty good

Keep 'em coming, man. I just found this story, I guess I hadn't seen it when you wrote it, I usually try to keep up with all the newest stories. Anyway, great storygame. I can't wait for more from you. Keep the romantic fantasies coming!

Excellent

Good story im sad that I got betrayed

Realy long. Almost to long. I think you should have tried to space this game out by having more options for the reader to choose because it didn't really feel like a chooseyourstory type of game. This probably would have been better as a regular story. Anyway, on to the good parts(Which there were many) Great writing. It was amazing how you described things and how the story progressed. I like the world that you created and was honestly interested in what happened to the characters.

If it wasn't so long, I would have given a perfect but it was still a great game for me to play. Great job!

6/8

Amazing! I saw a few errors with the first person/third person thing, and some grammar was off, but good story line, good pace, good everything. 7/8

This is the best CHOSE-YOUR-OWN-AVENTURE story I've read for a LONG time! Ti was a big story, but SOO worth it! Will ther be a sequal?

it was really nice i like the ending and everthing you should try to make a continuation of this story too!

Really good. I enjoyed everything. Seems to be perfect.

fantastic!

Will there be a sequel?

An interesting story but I wish it was longer and maybe a bit harder.

Haha... trickula

I enjoyed the story, but the grammar was off at times. It would have scored higher than a 6 if the choices had actually mattered, because half the time either choice brought me to the same location.

Still, story was good.

Wow... I was amazed with this game, I see that this was for the Fantasy Contest, I really hope this game wins, you deserve it. I'm speechless... this game took my breath away, just beautiful.

You change between past and present tense a lot, particularly in the beginning.
Otherwise a very nice story.