2/23/2021

2/9/2023 12:57 PM

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Warden

The Secret Forest

unpublished

One day Emma has to walk home from school the long way to avoid bullies, when she spies what she thinks is a mysterious white horse flitting through the mist. Following the creature leads her to a portal to another world filled with fantasy and danger, an entire realm of magical creatures who depend on her to save them.

I don't think there's anything wrong with the descriptions, but this has a few other small errors, and I think the paragraphs need to be broken up a more in the middle. If not just trimmed down, it might be a bit much around where you start talking about the fridge. I'm also not sure who "She" refers to, unless that was meant to be "You".

Hi, I have a vision of a game where you explore a kingdom to find a set of items. The idea being that they're always going to be in different places--but only certain ones. So an ancient helm for example could be found in a different museum or vault or the remains of a battlefield every time, but not a random bakery. Is this doable with scripting, and how?

I'm not sure if this is the right part of the forum. But I'm looking for what the subject says, examples of stories with unreliable narrators.

I don't know you, but hi! How did they lose your computer? I would be so mad.

Hiddlebid uses the invisibility ring and sneaks past the bees, easy peasy. There is one tense moment as a bee lands on her water wand and a stream of water SHOOTS out and smashes the bee to smithereens against a tree trunk. The bees all gather around the trees and buzz angrily, but they don't come to the conclusion it was an invisible witch. Hiddlebid climbs a couple of hills to get as far away as possible. From the top of one she sees a campfire in the distance. It's starting to get dark so she decides to go towards it to see if they're friendly. She finds a man in chainmail armor and a woman in flowing green robes and a wreath of leaves. Taking off her ring, she calls, "Hello!" and walks up to the fire. "It's a goblin girl!" The man exclaims. Hiddlebid realizes he must have seen her green skin and small size and jumped to conclusions. "Um, actually I'm a w...." "What a relief it's a friendly goblin from the nearby tribe, when I saw the pointy hat I thought it was one of those horribley evil witches and I almost grabbed my staff to prepare an attack spell!" the woman says with a sigh of relief. Hiddlebid coughed and nodded to them. "That is correct, I am a goblin." She soon learns their names are Sir Rodger and Serena, and that they're traveling in the direction she just came from. She warns them about the bees. "Ugh, that Wizard was so irresponsible, those bees will out compete the natural ones and destroy the evosystem." Serena says angrily. "I HATE wizards almost as much as I hate witches!" "It's alright Serena, I packed extra torches and you know your calming songs, we'll take care of those bees and get some honey to trade besides." Rodger reassures her. They both thank Hiddlebid for the information and offer to let her eat their stew and stay with them for the night, an offer she gladly accepts. She finds out they've traveled all around the area she's heading towards and know all kinds of useful things. Before they go to sleep, she has a chance to talk to them about three topics. What will those be?

Hiddlebid takes the water wand and the invisibility ring, thinking ahead to how they could booth be useful. Tying her handkerchief to the end of a stick, she picks up another one she's carved down to be a walking stick and bids her cat Emily a sad goodbye, leaving her some of the extra beef jerky she didn't pack. (It's a cave so Emily can go outside and hunt if she's gone too long, and there's a pool of water in the back.) Hiddlebid begins walking. She has to walk for a very long time to get anywhere because she's so short, and soon her legs get tired. But she's made progress and is in a part of the woods she hasn't visited at all since she became small. Sitting down to eat, she eats a sandwich and takes out a teacup to drink some water from a stream. While she's there she notices a few big fat bees also drinking water and carefully avoids them, though she notices to her dismay they fly away along the path she'll be traveling. Sure enough, when she continues she soon hears a loud buzzing overhead, and sees that in the last two years the bees have moved into the trees here, hanging several hives from the branches. Mouth watering amber honey drips down. She watches them from a distance and sees something odd: there flashes of sunlight like against something metal. That's when she realizes these are a magically enhanced species of bees created by the Wizard Dibinin. They must have escaped and built this colony in this area of the forest. The wizard is infamous for his sweet tooth and made the bees to make more honey and do a better job protecting it....instead of regular stingers they have longer stingers made of steel. Hiddlebid wrings her hands and mutters to herself in worry, trying to decide whether to sneak past the bees and how she will do it, or if she would walk a longer way to the unicorn valley, through hills that are prowled by wolves.

Your dog Bailey digs up a genie lamp in the back yard.

Who moved my thread? :( I could barely find it. But Hiddlebid decides to go to the unicorns, even if it means giving up her powers. She knows that they're Good creatures and that after that they'll be sworn to protect her from the other witches. She considers whether she could get the unicorns to KILL the other witches, but that's too far ahead to think about. Hiddlebid can't take very much with her on the journey because all her things were from when she was normal sized. She can barely even lift her broom, and the potions are like big glass jugs. "Drinking a potion for a full sized person would probably kill me" she muses to herself. "Better leave it alone." So she ties up some sandwiches and beef jerky in a handkerchief and then goes to her drawer of magic items, climbing on a footstool to get to it. Inside she has a lightning wand, a water wand, and a fire wand. All of her enchanted rings are too big for her fingers, but she has a carved witchwood chain and realizes she can put one of the rings on it and wear it as a necklace. There's a ring that protects from arrows, a ring that causes the plague, a ring that will turn her invisible, a ring that will protect from drowning or falling, and a ring that will turn a pumpkin into a carriage and mice into horses. Pick one wand and one ring.

Once there was a witch named Hiddlebid Small who lived in an enchanted forest. She was made fun of by the other witches because her spells didn't work right, and lived alone. Worst, she was short! Very very short. She was barely two feet high, because of a shrinking spell that had backfired. She'd never been able to undo it, and the forest was full of monsters and magical creatures and very dangerous for anyone so small. Hiddlebid wanted more than anything in the world to break the spell. So one morning she set out to do just that. She knew she could go to the unicorns, but they would make her give up her witch powers for good and join the church. She could go to the Wizard Dibinin, but he was old and ugly and would want to marry her in exchange for help. Finally she realized that being small and bad at magic wouldn't be a problem if she could find other people who were smaller, and worse at magic. Deciding what to do, she then started packing and preparing to leave her cave for the long journey. (Pick one and I'll write the next part.)

My name is Elizabeth and Wildblue made me an account. Nice to meet you all! I'm excited to write stories here. Does anyone have any advice? I already know about proofreading.