Wildblue, The Wordsmith
2/23/2021 4:38 PM
0 wins / 0 losses
Back from the grave! I've been writing a lot, mostly not CYOAS but expect to see something big from me soon!
Honor Among Thieves
You're Caelani, a member of the Thieves' Guild coming back from a job when an unexpected incident and an innocent desire to help catapults you into danger. My entry for Bucky's Year's End contest. This is my first story in a realistic fantasy setting. That seems to be the most popular here so I'll write more like this if the feedback is good.
Recent PostsThere is a Hell on 10/26/2020 8:58:30 PM
I like to write about wolves, I have a whole tribe of them in my dryad story....but this...is not okay.... D8
Does this government make sense? on 10/26/2020 8:55:22 PM
Thanks Mizal! I planned Honor out all wrong from the beginning. Rebels will do a much better job showing how the city works and letting you meet important characters. The factions will be important to the plot and for character motivation however so that's reason for the thread. I'm glad no one has seen any major problems with it all so far.
Does this government make sense? on 10/26/2020 8:50:16 PM
These are all great questions, thanks!One thing I should have been clearer about is that individual people in a faction don't get a vote, they have a representative in each city just like in real world government for states. How they pick them can be different for different factions, but it's usually more respected older members. How each group decides their vote can also be different, but there's a lot going on within each faction in each city that the others don't interfere with (unless someone is murdered or something.) A lot depends on who's in charge and what's the most practical for where they are and the others they're working with. With the Royals also, it's really just the king or queen that decides things. They're run like a normal monarchy, but after the king and queen and their kids or siblings, others related to them will have a title but not be especially important. The guard is just dedicated to keeping order and protecting people, they don't take over for the same reason the military doesn't in real life. It would be opposed by everyone and it's just not what they signed up for. And the ones that get promoted are going to be the best at their jobs and at representing their ideals. The church is like Christianity, they want everyone to follow the religion, but the teachings are about helping others and being humble, so nobody violent or greedy is going to be running a monastary unless things go really wrong. The merchants have the most complicated politics and criminal behavior among the upper ranks, since unlike the others there only motivation is to gain money and influence. They get cleaned up every now and then but there's always someone looking to get away with something underhanded. And finally, the Thieves don't always get involved with the votes, but if they do they're just letting everyone know what their position is. It's hard to explain but there's this balance with them and everyone else. If they make it clear they're going to oppose something and then they do, the guards would know to expect trouble and try to stop it without being upset about it, because that's what people asked for when they voted that way. But if it comes out they're threatening faction leaders and forcing their vote or anything else that crosses the line, then they'd all work to hunt them down and get rid of the current leadership. And the Thieves are careful because they're the only ones that can have their entire group ganged up on like this.
Does this government make sense? on 10/24/2020 4:01:18 PM
I've had people here before complain that the way the Thieves' Guild worked in my Redlion City setting from Honor Amoung Thieves and the sequel I started awhile back wasn't logical. (But I think I just did a bad job explaining it and used rushed examples.) So because of this I wanted to post a little about how all the factions work and how the kingdom is ruled, because it will be important in the next Redlion City story I write and I want to make sure there's no confusion, or anything about it that needs to be fixed. I have thought this all through very carefully however. 1: The Royals These are the families descended from the original kings that drove out the orcs and built the cities when humans first settled the island. Most of the time they rule their city just like a normal monarchy, but any law can be challenged by another faction and then voted on by the others. 2: The Merchants' Guild They have the most money and have connections all over the island, as well as ships. They're the most powerful faction and disliked by most of the others, but the taxes they pay are important to keep things running. Even though they're the most organized, most of them view each other as competition and never truly work together. 3: The Church They're also an island wide organization, but their leaders in the current time take a vow to never use money or carry a weapon, so they're not capable of being much of a threat to the others as they were in the past. They look after the poor and run the orphanages, and they're viewed as the most trustworthy and nuetral in settling arguments between the others. 4: The Guards The Redlion Guard hails back to a time of crime and corruption, when only the merchants and the royals could afford protection. A militia formed from common people protecting their homes, and they were so organized and popular that they were able to demand to be made an official faction. They get money for equipment and training from the other three, equal amounts so that they won't ever play favorites. In the time period the stories are in, the Redlion Guard is relied on by everyone to uphold the law, but in the past they were regarded as dishonorable thugs by the nobles and traitors by the criminal gangs, and have had to work hard for the respected position they have today. 5: The Thieves' Guild The Thieves were a secretive vigilante group that originated before the Guards did and have always been dedicated to keeping corruption in check. The original three factions all tried to wipe them out at one time or another, while they've always had a respectful relationship with the Guards, recognizing that even when they're opposed to each other they have the same goal of protecting the city. They don't get a vote on laws the way the other factions do, but if it's something they care about they'll leave a dagger or arrow wherever the meeting takes place: white for support and black for oppose, so the others always will know to expect trouble if they vote against them or can't come up with a compromise. The Thieves keeping their distance and being willing to fight oppressive laws is one of the main reasons they're less likely to be made, even if the other factions are taken over by corrupt leaders. On the island there are four other major cities besides Redlion. All the cities are independent, but ruled by the same system and factions, which some factions being more or less powerful in each place. The Church and the Merchant's Guild are organized factions that connect all the cities, but the actual governments are forbidden to interfere with each other except to protect each other if attacked. Orcs in this setting by the way don't live in caves, but are pirates and slavers. Humans first found the island by many of them being brought there as slaves and then escaping. Another unique thing is that there are no magic users, unless they're working with the orcs. Magic is always evil, and there are no wizards living on the island unless they're in hiding. If anyone has questions about any of this I can explain more about it.
Hello CYS on 10/23/2020 7:57:19 PM
I would have copied the finished draft here after the contest anyway, but to have it deleted was devastating and demoralizing. I had written 13 thousand words, which I know isn't a lot for people here, but that was a story I was excited about and then afterwards I couldn't bring myself to try and write it again for a long time. I've changed some things and restarted it again last month however, and the finished version will be much more epic. I've learned the importance of having more secure passwords as well, so really whatever hate filled and pathetic loser did that just had everything they wanted completely backfire. They tried to destroy my story and instead I'll just go and make it better than it ever was before. I'm just sorry they'll probably never know because the forum over there is broken and I can't make a thread to tell them so, and you can't even put anything in profiles there.
Hello CYS on 10/23/2020 7:44:49 PM
Thanks! This means a lot coming from you. :D Redlion and the island its on has become my favorite setting and it's where the main novel I'm working on takes place, Which is weird because I never used to like writing about humans at all. One of my planned storygames will be about the Thieves Guild and the Guards again, but it will let you see much more of the city and have more choices and meet more of the important characters. Honor Among Thieves was good practice, but it was a tiny and pathetic fragment of what it should have been.
Hello CYS on 10/23/2020 12:09:47 PM
I've been gone a long time but I haven't stopped thinking about this site. This is the first community I was ever in where everyone took writing seriously and had standards. I learned a lot here from the articles and reading workshop threads, and I've been writing even more on my own ever since. Both of my CYOA games so far were disappointments, and the third and biggest was deleted when my account on Infinite Story was hacked. But I think everyone will be impressed when they see what I've been working on since then and how much I've improved. I've decided I don't even like writing CYOA stories to be completely honest, I'd much rather focus on novels. But I'm going to promise you all three epic stories to prove the haters wrong and the people who supported me right. I may not be on the forum very often again after this, but I'll still be writing and my first story, The Dryad's Revenge (a rewrite of the one I had on IS but bigger and better), will be published before the end of the year.
Tiny 'topias Jam on 4/26/2020 7:35:38 PM
I'm entering my story Springberry Morning. It's 1915 words and takes place in a utopia. Please play and leave a comment!
Most complex game? on 4/26/2020 5:21:36 PM
I'm working on a small game right now and almost finished. It's going to be only 2000 words, but I already have a single script that's more than 300 lines long, an entire page that's nothing but variable text, and lots of smaller scripts and pages like that. I had no idea this would be so complicated when I started out, but I feel like I learned a lot and I'm pretty excited for other things I might do. I'm also curious, what's the game with the most advanced scripting on the site? It seems like so much work even doing small things so I can see why most people don't use it. But it's easy to learn, it just takes a long time putting everything together and all in exactly the right order.
Random items? on 4/25/2020 12:11:45 PM
I realized later it was okay to have them in the inventory as long as they were random and it was easy to take them out again.