4/1/2023

10/9/2025 7:14 PM

427

2

1 win / 2 losses

Architect

“This is the ending all stories must eventually reach:
silence around an empty stage.”

—Unknown

Lazarus Cage

They want to keep you bound in the dark, but you won't let them. You will get out, fight and flee, fail and die, then try again and again...

Nautilus

Grudges must always be the first to die when a storm arrives.

After years away you return home to your dying father, but will you be able to get your brother to forgive you for leaving? And will you step up to the challenge to inherit your father's most prized possession?

Written as part of the 2023 Spring/Summer Contest: Gone Fishin' it is a game with a much bigger focus on story than gameplay, but still there is a decent amount of endings and variation for something this short.

I feel like it would be fitting to say something meaningful considering the circumstances, and yet at the same time I know there's no need to say anything. My job as both guide and protector is done in a way that leaves me satisfied. You know what to do anyway.

No promises, but I will try. Everything is currently up in the air for the entire rest of October, but I'll try to offload as much work as I can on some college students.

Due to some work stuff I most likely won't be able to make it that weekend so I'm going to vacate my spot ahead of time instead of taking a gamble on what state I will be in for games at 2AM.

Congratulations to RK on kicking your fellow gazette team member's asses.

Two really good stories that take the prompt in different directions, but are also quite similar in terms of setup and themes. Both start with a new King, who’s wildly unprepared for the task set in front of him, and both end with a reign cut short due to things out of their control. Both even feature a close aid/confidant character that ends up “betraying” the protagonist by the end. There still are plenty of differences to make each story unique, and most of those make me lean towards Story A.

It’s not a perfect story, especially the opening is quite confusing to get a grasp on in terms of time, place and circumstances, but the writing is solid enough that it stops being a problem once the story gets properly going. Story B’s setup was much easier to get a grasp on, and the whole thing flowed better from start to finish, but compared to A it felt quite short. The main thing that ultimately decided on the result I feel like is the ending. Both stories aim for a twist, but A does a better job between coming up with something more unexpected and executing the idea better. In my opinion B didn’t really earn the emotional payoff of its ending, partially because it didn’t do nearly enough work building up the characters to make Edward’s decision sting, and in part because the ending is borrowed from The Mist, which in my eyes only lessens the impact since I can’t help but compare the two. A’s superb writing means it would still probably win if I wasn’t aware of B’s inspiration, but it’d be much closer to the point of possibly being a toss-up if Story B did a bit more work in terms of characterization.

I mean not really but the image isn't that far removed from the meaning behind that name back when first came up with it.

Not necessarily. If all the story does is try to emotionally manipulate you to hide how bad it is in every aspect then yeah, but on the other hand if someone made a really good story that's supposed to yank your heartstrings or otherwise make you feel something personal then it can just as easily be an 8. It might sound like a double standard, but it's more like comparing that one friend who's a really good dude that had some kind of tragedy happen to them and they want to share it to a greasy goblin that uses the fact they ran away from home to manipulate you into taking care of them. Both will end up clouding your judgement, but only one has earned the right to.

Congrats Stargirl, may your reign be pleasant and tidy.

Yes but different people will have different definitions for engaging and standards by which they score. A good example would be that unless you have a major SPAG error in every other sentence I probably won't dock anything from the score because I'm not in a position to call out other people's English skills, but Goodnight will be harsher on that front. Or how RK already rated 10 games an 8 while I still haven't rated anything on the site that high.

1 (Fuck off and fuck you) - Getting all the way down here means your story downright insults the reader or is actively malicious in its intent. Plagiarism, AI, manipulating the player to mask your own inadequacy as a writer etc. 2 (Horrendous) - To get here a story needs to not only be pointless, but actively fighting itself and the reader. Contradictory writing, complete disregard for pre-established rules, plot-holes, messy characters and so forth. Basically nothing but a complete rewrite could fix it. 3 (Bad) - Being here means there is either some potential to the fundamental story, or maybe it has at least one thing that somewhat elevates it like narration or characters, but overall it's still buried in issues. 4 (Meh/fine) - If you end up here than you created the epitome of fine or middling. It can go either way and mean that it's multiple good things mixed with the bad things in mostly equal proportions, or that everything falls so close to the middle that it's barely worth talking about. It's possible for it to still be worth recommending to someone particularly interested in the topic when there's no better alternatives. 5 (Good) - Landing here means you made something worthwhile, but still fell short in a few aspects. With a few tweaks and redrafts you might have actual gold in your hands. Unless it's something very specific or niche anything rated this or higher is a recommendation from me. 6 (Great/Solid) - Being at this level means you're a really good writer. The final product might not be perfect, but the issues present shouldn't massively impact enjoyment. This is probably a point where I can start accepting it if someone says they think it's an 8. 7 (Amazing) - Yeah, you earned the right to have an ego. By this point if there is anything wrong it's either a nitpick or a problem that ends up drowned out by so much good things I only mention it out of obligation. 8 (Just read it) - There's basically two ways to get here: either write something so impossibly immaculate that I'll struggle to find anything to complain about after taking it apart at a molecular level, or craft something that will affect me in a way that takes away my ability to rate it on an objective scale. It's not uncommon for things that are part of a great series I've followed for a very long time to end up here for this reason. Hopefully this helps explain that just because I tend to lean towards rating things 5 or 6 rather than jumping straight for a 7 or 8 doesn't mean I don't enjoy stuff. It's just that y'all got conditioned to think a 6/10 means utter garbage that should be dragged behind the barn and shot along with its creator. In terms of if an opinion is valid despite not completing a game to 100% I think the answer is yes, but both the reader and author need to be aware that it is an incomplete opinion so it shouldn't be taken as the only one if you want to gauge the quality of something. Also in terms of what I enjoy seeing in reviews of especially my stuff is examples and suggestions. You can glaze or berate me all you want, but that stuff will ultimately end up mixed into the same gray blob and forgotten while more constructive stuff like which specific part can be fixed and how tends to stick longer and might even end up in my notes for the next thing.