Mystery / Puzzle
, #52 for
played 1,743 times (finished 147)
"march in the swamp"
"So short yo' momma thought it was a recipe"
"aren't you a little too old to be trick or treating"
Some material may be inappropriate for persons under age 13. If this were a movie, it would probably be PG-13.
A young girl's body has been found in a lake.It's up to you to find the killer and put him behind bars. [Also other cases] *FINISHED*
I thought it was cool.
on 2/17/2018 7:35:44 PM with a score of 0
Oh boy, where do I even start?
First, there were some spelling errors. Make sure if there's a red line under the word you just typed, you fix it so there is no red line!!
Next, this was completely unrealistic. I'm a detective, right? Why do I buy drugs from someone? And how am I able to buy a plane ticket to who knows where with drugs? And how am I able to get through security with someone else's passport? And how am I able to carry around tire tracks with me? Is it a picture, or...? And why the heck would I jump out my window because I apparently hate my job? And why is "NO" and option for another assignment when you can't even click it? And why am I able to carry around evidence from previous investigations? Shouldn't they be in the evidence room or something? And.....!!!!
You know what I mean.
I also didn't know what I was supposed to be doing. All I got was "Someone drowned," "There's the killer," "Ew, airplane food," and other things that just didn't make sense.
Another thing: this story has very short descriptions. You should expand on details a little - no, a lot - more. Just putting it out there. You also have to give me more choices, because I felt like I was being forced into situations I did not want to be in.
Finally, when I die by getting shot or jumping out a window, they need different death pages. It made no sense when I died and there were two descriptions on there. Being normal, I automatically read everything put there, instead of just one thing. There was an option for different death pages in the editing mode, I know that, so why did you put them together?
I could go on and on about how you could make this "story" better. But I won't, because I'm out of time. I gave it a 1/8, but I had trouble choosing between 1/8 or 2/8. I think if you gave it more detail and plot, and also gave us a background of what we're doing, then you would definitely get a higher rating.
Please forgive me if this seems a bit harsh or offensive to you, I am sorry. I give my criticism for good purposes, because I believe that if you follow at least some of my advice, this could potentially be a great story-game. :)
on 1/9/2018 1:12:34 PM with a score of 0
"Sneak out the window:Did i say you're office was very high? No? Sorry then."
No, but I prefer that option of staying ALIVE after sneaking out the window. ;)
"I'm assaining you to a easier case.Will you accept"
And what is with that 'No' button that I can't seem to select?
It's just too simple and not much of a mystery at all! =D
on 11/1/2017 10:41:23 PM with a score of 0
I love detective. That's why I love this game. 6/8
-- Azuan on 6/4/2017 9:36:32 AM with a score of 0
Okay, this had some stuff going for it...but it was a total mess. This was all over the place and very linear. The investigator asks you for the autopsy report, and the only way forward is to give him the gun. If you die, then it always pretends you leaped out the window.
on 5/22/2017 6:59:50 AM with a score of 0
It was a really good story thing. I loved it. I just wish that it was a little longer.
-- samantha on 1/22/2017 3:17:36 AM with a score of 0
This spelling was disgusting.
-- Andrew on 11/28/2016 10:05:32 PM with a score of 0
on 10/24/2016 8:11:26 AM with a score of 0
Poor spelling, bad grammar, terrible punctuation, awful dialogue, lack of logic in solving crimes. At least it was short.
on 8/31/2016 12:44:10 PM with a score of 0
;-; I don't even know how to start with all the mistakes in this story.
Why in the world would you leave a passport by the guy you murdered?
What was with the drug dealer? And the ticket seller?
And just all the grammar mistakes...
I think I'm going to listen to the voice in MY head and give this a 1/8
on 7/18/2016 3:15:03 PM with a score of 0
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