Player Rating3.10/8

"#831 overall, #30 for 2005"
based on 310 ratings since 06/10/2006
played 4,580 times (finished 400)

Story Difficulty3/8

"trek through the forest"

Play Length2/8

"So short yo' momma thought it was a recipe"

Maturity Level3/8

"must be at least this tall to play"
Contains content that may not be suitable for persons under age 10. If this were a movie, it would probably be between G and PG.



This is a school type game, and it is sure to include some action, adventure, a teeny romance, and a great ending.

Part 2 completed.

Player Comments

This story has a nice premise and potential. The little pictures were also nice. But yes, the grammar really needs work. While sentence fragments can word as a literary technique, only in certain times, certain places, and with intention. I saw more than a couple sentence fragments and they really interrupt the reading of the story.

Nice to know that you get to be popular by being able to beat up and entire gang of sixth-grade girls. Am I a girl? I’m thinking that I am, but that was never quite clear in the story, was it? But hey, at least the girls made a second appearance with knives. Wait, where is this middle school that has knife-wielding girl gangs? I mean sure, in a high school you’d expect that, but in middle school? Well, I guess its good that they actually got banned from the school when I tattled like a little girl – oh wait, does that mean I AM a little girl in this story?

Part two was really weird. I went from my first day of school getting the girl gang banned to suddenly it being summer and being stalked by the armed gang in disguise. And oh, the gang is led by the math teacher! What insanity is this? This school is really starting to scare me. But at least my boyfriend rescued me. Wait, I have a boyfriend?

So cute story, I guess, with a lot of potential, but it really could be developed quite a bit more to flesh out the happenings and the characters. Perhaps you can find someone here that would help you with the editing as well, if you post snippets in forums, you can often find people that will help you correct your English. Thanks for sharing this with the site.
-- Ogre11 on 6/16/2018 2:26:29 PM with a score of 0
It's hilarious that at an elementary school there's a group of girls who jump new students at the first opportunity to murder them with knives, and I guess no one ever noticed and caught on.

Unfortunately the rest of this was pretty low quality, the ravings of IlliterateFangirl69 aside.

Passages like this:

'You are starting your first day of school. You have just arrive at school, and is making a dash for your class. You made it in time. Your teacher introduce you and went straight to teaching.'

...are just pretty cringeworthy all around, as far as grammar goes. The author seems to have been very young (at the time they published this...ten years ago, wow), so the hope is they kept practicing and went on to write better things.
-- mizal on 12/20/2016 2:25:04 PM with a score of 0
This story.. Has a few problems.

First of all, the grammar. Please fix it. Spelling is okay, but the grammar needs work.

The details. 'I don't want to explain, so let's get on with the story'? The problem is, you might not want to explain, but we want to hear your explanation. Even if you don't want to or don't feel like explaining things, it makes the story better! We want details too - Tell us about the main character, the boyfriend, and the girls that are bothering her. Tell us about the school. Details, please!

It's short. This could have been expanded much more than it was. Additionally, it could use more choices. As it is, it pushes the reader through the story, and people like choices.
-- AllThatIsGold on 1/10/2016 4:50:49 PM with a score of 0
It was good but boring cause it was so short
-- Rose Olympus on 9/23/2019 8:17:16 PM with a score of 0
This game is extremely boring and short
-- Pink girl on 2/3/2019 10:25:04 AM with a score of 0
Well. That was easy. I manged to beat up the girls. With my boyfriend. I got the best ending.
-- Szy on 11/3/2018 7:41:14 PM with a score of 0
OMG I loved the second part it was so wonderful. Even though the teacher was a total dick
-- KJR on 7/18/2018 10:41:52 AM with a score of 0
So awsome
-- Amanda Moore on 4/27/2018 4:18:37 PM with a score of 0
nice! played part 2
-- narwhalsswimmin on 12/21/2017 10:49:13 PM with a score of 0
Meh. Part 2 was slightly more interesting than part 1, but overall the story felt kinda random, unrealistic, and just not very interesting. 2/8.
-- crazygurl on 6/15/2017 6:45:42 PM with a score of 0
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