I've written a prologue for my story and wanted to ask for some tips and improvements on how I could make it better. Cheers! ^_^
Knock Knock Knock!
"What's that?!" Says Sophie. "It can't be the postman at this time. Can it?" A loud groaning sound comes from outside the wooden cottage the Granger family own in Devon. "Some say this cottage plays tricks on us." Says her brother Samuel. "I once found some blood in the bath. But that was probably father shaving and had slipped with the razor." The loud groaning noise appears again. This time, the children hear a click. "The door is opening!" Says Sophie. "What are we going t-" Sophie is interrupted by a deep low laugh. A face of horror stands in front of her. "The face of The Bogeyman!" Says Samuel. "Run!" he shouts. But it is too late. The Bogeyman has Sophie. He grabs her in a very tight squeeze around her neck. He suffocates her. "NOOOO! My sister!" The Bogeyman releases Sophie and she drops to the ground as still as a cat ready to jump for its prey. The Bogeyman lets out another deep low laugh and does the same to Samuel. He is dead now. All that can be heard is the soft cry of the wind as The Bogeyman has claimed another victim. Sapping out their life force. Leaving them to die. He leaps onto his levitating horse and carriage, gives them a whip and WHOOSH! He flies away into the night sky, leaving the remaining corpses of Sophie and Samuel in the Granger family cottage. All alone, freezing cold...
