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How to be a billionaire

11 years ago
To be a billionaire:
Step 1: Take 1000$ out from the bank as a loan.

Step 2: Hire a private detective to find you a high ranking mafia member.

Step 3: Find the mafia member and impress him with knowledge about him that you shouldn't be able to have (because of your PI) and he'll accept you to the mafia. You'll probably have to kill someone innocent.

Step 4: Slowly build your powerbase in the mafia. Focus on keeping your power largely unknown to the people above you in rank. This will take between 3-10 years.

Step 5: When it's becoming difficult to hide your power from the guys above you and you have a lot of power, use it to kill everyone above you in the mafia in one night.

Step 6: Claim the mafia empire as your own.

Step 7: Liquidate assets and people who may be in your way. Either do this slowly to avoid government notice or pay off all of the high ranking members of the government so that they don't care. This will cost a couple million but to a man like yourself, it won't matter.

Step 8: You'll likely want to buy an island in the pacific to keep so that if things hit the fan with the government or people you may have angered, you can escape. Keep the island fully staffed with everything you'd need to survive. Alternatively, buy one in the Caribbean.

Step 9: Put 750,000,000 dollars into Gold so that currency devaluation won't be a big deal.

Step 10: Relax, you're a billionaire.

Note: You'll go to hell.

How to be a billionaire

11 years ago

There's an easier way. Buy billion zimbabwe dollars. It'll cost you a pittance.

How to be a billionaire

11 years ago

Yawn.

How to be a billionaire

11 years ago

1k for a private eye? holy crap! lol doing the math, Ford's stock in february of last year was $1.58, it has hit $14 recently. that would have been the better bet. Citibank's shares are at an all time low right now too, another good investment. but anyway, is this for a story 3j?

nate

How to be a billionaire

11 years ago
What kind of private eye wants to snoop on a mafia boss, really...

To be a billionaire with Ford's stocks, you would have had to invest this much money: 112,857,142.86.

If you had 113 million dollars sitting around, that would have worked. But what percentage of stocks rose by 8 times like Ford did? Let's say that the percentage was 0.01 which is probably generous.

You now have a 1% chance of becoming a billionaire off of your investment of ONE HUNDRED AND THIRTEEN MILLION DOLLARS!

Bad odds, especially when that money is at risk.

My plan is practically risk free :P

How to be a billionaire

11 years ago

1. Come up with a lame clever nickname.

2. Write a bunch of rap songs about sex, drugs, and how gay full of yourself you are whilst overusing profanities. The last part is VERY crucial, you will not make ANY money if you do not curse at least 6 times per 2 seconds.

3. Make sure to record the songs with so much AutoTune that people can't understand a word you're saying.

4. Submit your work to a publishing company.

5. Turn on the radio, and hear your songs and about how it's the #1 alBUM in existance.

If the money does not get mailed to you, threaten the radio station. They'll lose popularity if people found out they stood up to the reason they're making so much money.

With the money, keep writing more "songs" and keep repeating the process.

How to be a billionaire

11 years ago
I think 3J would be a pretty clever rap name if he goes along with jeffs plan