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I got my first story game out there for you to try.  Sorry about messaging people earlier, I did not look through the forum to see about posting my story.

Please give it a try and rate and comment if you don't mind.  Look forward to hearing from you!

-Blaze

Azure, Indigo, Cobalt- you've really got a thing for blue, don't you?

I haven't left a comment on your game yet, since I want to play it through a few more times. 

My immediate opinion is- did someone else coauthor this with you?  There's a marked stylistic disconnect between the beginning of the game and the part after you meet the girl.

Also, I'm personally not a fan of the way you did the dialogue (as if it were a script, rather than a story.)  If this were a VN, that's exactly how you'd write it, but in a CYOA it's distracting rather than immersive.

There's definitely potential here, which is why I want to see all the story branches before rating it.

Thanks for the feedback, I can address some of your questions/comments.

No, I wrote this myself.  However, I wrote for about 3 hours yesterday and another 3 or so today.  Maybe I was just in a different state of mind.  Didn't realize the 'disconnect'.

Thank you for mentioning the dialogue.  I didn't think of it as a script, but now that you mention I can see your point.  I will try a different approach on my next story game.

Well, there were some gaps between paragraphs that didn't make much sense. I don't know why you italic some paragraphs, and the ending didn't make much sense. 

I must say... it was really good!  It had a nice, although the descriptions felt a little dry, so if you had added in more detail, it would've been amazing.   Also, try using more senses than just sight, hearing, and touch (if I'm not mistaken), and try using smell and even taste.  I haven't played all of the endings, so I may be missing a few things, but just keep this advice, and try to implement it whenever you can.

Now because of this game, I know you are a determined and great writer, so I can look forward to your games... if you are going to write more...  *wink-wink*  *nudge-nudge*

EDIT:  Whoa!  Did not see that coming!