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Hi guys! After four months of difficult coding and story writing headaches I DID IT! I completed the first part of my storygame where you create your character! Now I just need to run a trial to make sure everything is working properly. Can you guys help me out with that?

Just go to the game (link will be typed shortly) and try out the first part of the game. Then PM ME to tell me what you think.

DO NOT COMMENT ON MY GAME AS IT IS NOT FINISHED YET!!!!!!!

Thank you and Merry Christmas!

Oops! Forgot the link!

Here it is:

http://chooseyourstory.com/story/broken-shadows

Ok. I fixed some things so now try it and see if it works! :D

Thanks again for helping me out here guys!

First thing that jumps out at me: Stop the fourth wall breaking. It  forcibly ejects me from the immersion when you add NONE! THIS IS THE FIRST PAGE! 

And the "IF I HAD PUT A LINK IT WOULD MESS THE WHOLE THING UP!!!".  Just put "Warning: The Legion Decision cannot be reversed." or something like that. Also, the caps abuse sounds a bit childish. 

I can't really judge because you didn't give us anything, story wise. Do you want me to judge the character-creator? It's fine. 

Eh, it was good  for a character creator, but you didn't give us a damned thing story wise, so I can't give you something such as a rating just based off that. But I do have two complaints:

1. Stop breaking the fourth wall. Malk already explained this, so I don't have to.

2. The name is in all capitals, as opposed to shifting the text to lowercased after the first letter. But I'll give you some slack, considering you stated in your profile that you suck at coding.

Overall, you should have given us some stuff story wise, then we can give you some advice. But considering this is supposed to be post-apocalyptic, you should try to make it like Fallout, which I recommend greatly (Just see my profile pic. BEHOLD THE GREAT AND ALL POWERFUL VAULT BOY). That's all I have to say, have a good one.

~ Chris

Thanks guys. I really appreciate the help. And just so you know, up until know I had no idea what the "fourth-wall" and "breaking the fourth-wall" meant! So you can't really blame me there. Also, I had CLEARLY stated that this was a test run of the creator ONLY! I didn't put any storyline stuff because I wanted to make sure the creator was working properly first.

Oh, and Malk? Can you help me with the name capitalizations? I don't know how to use the %%DIGIT1%=%1%A%%%%DIGIT1%=%2%B%% etc. thing to make the first letter capital and the rest lowercase. It's probably staring me in the face, but since I suck at coding, I can't see it. Help?

Ok, so the caps are fixed on the actual text, still need help with the name though. Any advice? I absolutely suck at coding so it is probably right in front of me but I can't see it. Also, fixed the problem with not being able to enter 7-letter names, TacocaT pointed it out to me. (Thanks!) Anyway, once I fix the problem with the name being in caps, then I'll have you guys check it out and it should be all set. Any help for the "caps locked" name?

OK! My friend (who is also a user on the site: MadSETIResearcher. He's a n00b, but for some reason knows a lot about coding!) just pointed out to me that when he was talking with someone else on the site recently, he heard how to do the name thing. Thanks Jake! <------- (Why am I typing this? He's right next to me!)

Thanks for your help and support and I'll get to fixing everything right away! :D

Yes, I can fucking blame you. You should have the common sense not to talk directly to your reader. 

Also, I'm not helping you after that bullshit you pulled on the WC thread. 

Come now Mal, there is no need for hostilities...or is there?

She just needs some guidance.