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Been forever. Wow. Looking back at these stories, they did not survive the test of time. In fact, they got brutally raped in a prison shower by time itself. Did work hard, I will say that. However, if I just had a little more caffiene in my diet, I could've written some ORIGINAL humor instead of stealing from other stuff.

Welcome back! Are you planning on writing any new storygames while you're here?

WB 

Hi, how long has it been?

Welcome back - Your games may have not been the best rated, but you got a crap-ton of them haha!

You should definitely try to finish some more of them  ^-^

Hello there, sir.

Good morning/evening fellow human. Hope you enjoy your renewed stay here.

I will. I doubt I'll actually make anything. I've got that creativity block. Unless anyone has any ideas...

Yes, but they are all bad ;)

Thanks for the suggestion. :)

By the way, I actually went back and read my adventure games that have seemed to be picking up approximately over seven years worth of Internet dust.

And after playing through them....uggh....excuse me for a moment, everyone. This won't take long.

(pulls out his iPhone and touches an icon)

ME: "There's an app for that, bitch."

(teleports in a flash of light)

(November 26th, 2006)

(I am 15, and am in my family's old house, having just finished making the alternate ending to May the 28th)

ME06: "Ah, another day, another masterpiece! Can't wait until everyone reads my work!"

(I teleport in, and the 06 version of me turns his office chair and jumps in surprise)

ME06: "Who the hell are-"

(I punch 06 in the stomach and then push his office chair backward so he rolls out)

ME: "YOUR WORST FUCKING NIGHTMARE, YOU AUTISTIC FUCKRAT!!"

(06 Me is on the floor struggling to breathe or even sob in pain and I kick him in the balls and repeatedly stomp his face in)

ME: "You think your Christopher Reeve jokes are funny now, asshole??"

(I grab him by the neck and throw him through the glass window. Then, I jump through it and kick him in the balls again)

ME06: "OWWWWWW!!"

ME: "Wow! That's the hardest I've ever beaten anyone since I made that unfunny Family Guy cutaway joke....SEVENTEEN FUCKING TIMES TOO MANY!!"

(I kick him repeatedly in his left eye socket, then I pull out a gun and gently hand it to him)

ME: "Now kill yourself, you fucking....walking....MISTAKE OF GOD!! And by the way.....in case you haven't realized yet..."

(I walk up to me, laying on the ground, not able to get up)

ME: "YOU'RE NOT FUCKING FUNNY!!"

(I curb stomp him one last time before teleporting back to 2013.)

ME: "Okay. I feel much better now. Anyway, about the new games I might make --"

(I take a look at my hands, only to see them fading away and realize....I actually did it.)

ME: "Well....fuck."

(I bellow "NOOO..." until my particles completely evaporate from existence.)

Hey, maybe your reeve jokes aren't funny, but that sure as hell was

Although I only made one Christopher Reeve joke, my humor only got worse from there. They would go from unfunny, to repetitive, to unoriginal, sometimes to downright dry and offensive. Basically, I wrote these stories for the same reason anyone would write stories: It was the closest I could get to being a God of a fictional world without actually having to create pictures, animations, programming, filming, or any of that. And, being desperate to escape from such a harsh, mean-spirited world full of tormenters and abusers that spared me very little, it's what I did after discovering this site when I was bullied quite a lot by a member of my family for my tastes in cartoons, television, and video games.

Not to go too hard on myself (but I'm afraid I'll have to), I was...the Christian Weston Chandler of this site.

There. It's off my chest.

By the way, I forgot to tell you where I've been this whole eight years. On YouTube. Yup, after bitching that my Deven711 account was suspended, I built a Deven247 account, where I began making YouTube Poops (mashups or something) and got pretty popular. Then, some copyrighters came after me and I had to privatize everything, costing me 666 subs. Next account came, named Pooper724. Got deleted by WMG during their reign of terror. Now I'm on my current account: Pooper2471. Here's the link. Feel free to look around.

http://www.youtube.com/user/Pooper2471