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D&D/Tabletop RPG Stories

6 years ago

So, a few days ago I ran a session that practically ended in a TPK (total party kill: an event that kills all of the players in a game, for all of you who didn't know).

Here's some background on the players and their characters. We have been playing a sandbox-esque game in a homebrewed world.

Jyullcomir: This guy (the player's characters) has died twice already in the time-span of nearly two years IRL. First Clockwork, a human thief, then Broken-shell, who was a human cleric, and now Jyullcomir who is a dwarven fighter. He was huge munchkin at first, but became more tolerable as time went on. He's died mainly due to his own foolishness. At the time of this story, he is currently helping out the development of a goblin city-state in the Northern deserts.

Eric Maxwell: A Chaotic evil magic-user with skill in the realm of mysticism that is mediocre at best. He instead mainly relies on crazy plans and jimmy-rigged items and luck to work his way around things. He has currently implanted a fragment of his soul into a massive suit of armor.

Marlin the Beautiful: Another magic-user who was trapped inside a magical urn in a another wizard's basement by accident. His time inside captivity has left him disfigured, to say the least. He likes to stay neutral, and works as the voice of reason for Eric Maxwell.

Ghost: A Lawful good cleric who fares from a village of dragon-tamers. He currently travels with his halfling wife, and white dragon wyrmling. He tends to keep the more dastardly members of the group in check.

Shylock: This Chaotic Neutral Elf has a love for money and power, and often gets himself into trouble. However, his smooth talking and good looks tend to get him out of it.

Now, let's get to the actual story. Jyullcomir enters this castle-town kingdom, and hears that their king is deathly ill. He meets the king, who sends him on a quest to retrieve a certain flower in some ruins that will cure him of his sickness. Jyullcomir accepts the mission and brings the flower back to the king, where it's made into tea that fixes him up real good. After mucking around with the king and the prince and princess, he is named the kingdom champion.

Then, Shylock comes into the town, and after screwing around with some merchants and a particular doctor, he dresses himself in some fine robes he haggled for, and asks to be brought to the king. Looking like an important person to the royal guard, they let him into the castle. Shylock enters the throne room and casts [Charm Person] on the king. The [Charm Person] spell will make the target believe that the caster is their best friend, and will obey nearly any request or command, aside from anything that will inherently harm the target. So, our devious little elf asks to be on equal standing as the king, and he agrees.

Jyullcomir's jimmies get real rustled. He belts out in his deep dwarven voice, "Who is this guy, he clearly just wandered in here, and now you're making him king?"

The king responds, spit flying from his mouth in a rage, "HOW DARE YOU ACCUSE MY DEAR FRIEND OF BEING ANYTHING LESS THAN MY GREATEST ALLY!" And, just as the ban hammer starts a-swingin', "I WANT YOU OUT OF MY KINGDOM, NOW! SHOW YOUR FACE AGAIN, AND YOU'RE A DEAD MAN!"

Jyullcomir leaves, and in a depressed sort of wanderlust heads off to the desert, where he becomes irrelevant to this story.

Now, as all this was happening, Marlin, Eric, and Ghost were out and about investigating this corrupt nobleman, who was buying elves as slaves. They show up to his tower in the castle-town. Instead of exposing him, they end up working for him and putting an end to the work of a group of overly-investigative civilians. They report back, and the noble is pleased, and rewards them. Then, Ghost decides its a good time as any to put an end to his misdeeds and smash his head in with his war hammer.

They all decide to set free all the slaves and prisoners, and burn his tower down. Ghost goes off to do his own thing in the town, and Eric has a nice little plan up his sleeve.

Meanwhile, Shylock, as newly crowned diarch, (think monarch, but two) declares war on all goblins. He orders that all the goblins in the town are brought to the castle so he may interrogate them. Five goblins are brought in, and he swiftly executes four of them while making the others watch. For the last one, he hands him a dagger and whispers in the goblin's crusty green ear, "If you try and make a move against me, I'll deal with you just as I did with your brothers. I want you to come with me to the throne room, and murder the king."

The goblin shakes, and in complete fear for his life, agrees.

Shylock and the goblin walk to the throne room, and Shylock tells the king that this poor goblin fellow has something to say.

The goblin stands, shaking. "Spit it out, friend," The king says.

Just then, the goblin flings the dagger through the air, and by sheer luck, it lodges itself into the king's throat.

"Knights! Come, all! This filthy goblin has just murdered our glorious king!" Shylock shouts, his voice echoing through the castle. The knights come and Shrek the living stuffing out of the poor goblin, but this is just the start of it all.

>Enter Eric and Marlin.

Eric approaches Shylock and reports that the nobleman (who happened to be the king's cousin) has died. He barters to take his place as a nobleman. Shylock decides it's prime time for a speech to the people. He leaves the castle with Eric and Marlin, and finds a nice spot in the middle of the town. He begins his speech:

"I am so very sorrowful on this day. Our great king, my greatest friend, had died at the hands of goblin assassin!" The people gasp, as Shylock feigns tears. "I wish that were it. But, our king's dear cousin, has died at the hands of these goblin scum as well, leveling his domain to rubble. I, your remaining ruler, have decided to clear all your debts and open up the opportunity to serve your kingdom in my army. We will wage war against the goblin scu-," Just then, Shylock is interrupted.

Ghost shouts from the crowd, "Cease this, Shylock! What you're doing is wrong!" Ghost commands the crowd to part after a display of power from his elemental staff, which shoots a beam of intense heat into the sky. They obey.

Eric has his armor body block the stand, as Ghost approaches. Ghost expresses his distaste by ripping a hole through Armor's leg, which simply escalates things. Armor Eric snatches away his elemental staff, as Ghost commands his baby dragon to use it's ice breath to freeze Shylock, who is standing atop a wooden stage. The dragon musters up as much power as it can, casting Shylock's head in a block of ice. Ghost leaps, and smashes the ice off of Shylock's face, leaving him nearly dead.

Now, Eric's human body which is standing atop the stage with Shylock, decides to whip out a certain wand he found a while back in different quest. An ornate wand loaded with the [Fireball] spell. He points it at his feet and fires, enveloping everything within twenty feet in a bursting, intense ball of flame.

Ghost's wife, being a halfling is very light on her feet, and she leaps away sustaining enough damage to leave her unconscious. Aside from her, the bodies of everyone else lay either extra crispy or as a pile of ash. Eric's armor body is the only thing that remains. He stands there, left with only his thoughts and the screams of the commoners as they flee the scene.

~The End~

TLDR: A bunch of dorks go mad with power, some guy tries to stop them and they end up like Uncle Lars and Aunt Beru.

D&D/Tabletop RPG Stories

6 years ago
What was Eric expecting to happen when he used the wand that way? Aside from everyone paying the price of adventuring with chaotic dickheads to begin with?

Pretty good story though. I've never been able to really get into tabletop games due to not having had any nerd friends since high school but I always enjoy the stories of shenanigans.

I know @Malkalack could add a few of this own, but he's been off getting entirely encased in a block of ice or something. Endmaster I'm sure has some good ones too, and we might get some entertaining new text walls out of Sent.

D&D/Tabletop RPG Stories

6 years ago

Funny you should bring this up, I've just recently found this site called RPG Horror Stories and its packed with all sorts of dysfunctional goodness.

Here's one:

https://www.reddit.com/r/rpghorrorstories/comments/74b5wq/i_castrate_my_son/

D&D/Tabletop RPG Stories

6 years ago

Oh gosh. That's a real horror story.

D&D/Tabletop RPG Stories

6 years ago

Lesson learned, be like the dwarf dude and get out while you can.  Eric seemed badass enough except that he got himself killed.

D&D/Tabletop RPG Stories

6 years ago

Well, not really. Now he's a hulking suit of armor.

D&D/Tabletop RPG Stories

6 years ago

Meant to say Ghost, not Eric.  Was an error

D&D/Tabletop RPG Stories

6 years ago

Oh yeah, he was pretty cool. Now the player is playing as Ghost's wife.

I used this instance to justify converting the game over to the Mini Six system. Now, only two characters from the original party survived, and they are going on a save-the-world quest. They have to destroy at least three out of four giant magic pillars that are being used by an evil wizard to summon a banished god from the Abyss.

D&D/Tabletop RPG Stories

6 years ago

Sounds like you run a great game! :-) 

Only just last week played as a level 11 chaotic good monk/druid (my first game in 25 years!).

D&D/Tabletop RPG Stories

6 years ago

Haha, I try! I always keep in mind what one of my previous DM's said, basically focus more on story, player investment, and fun.

D&D/Tabletop RPG Stories

6 years ago

That sounds like a cool plot.  So what happens when someones character dies, they just make a new one?

D&D/Tabletop RPG Stories

6 years ago

Yeah, that's what we've been doing. And, thanks!

D&D/Tabletop RPG Stories

5 years ago

Sounds like an instance where if you can't beat them....be even shittier than they are.

D&D/Tabletop RPG Stories

5 years ago

God this looks like my main group, we are all assholes and constantly killed each other off before even reaching the middle point, but after three years of constant killing one of our groups reached level 18, huzzah, now towards the story.

The players:

Me: a lvl 18 homebrew Warlock/Priest hybrid, Lawful evil, and pretty much an OP dark priest that gave little to no fucks about "balance".

Cronos: a lvl 18 Homebrew Warlock, Chaotic Evil, One word Fireball.

Conan: (original as fuck eh) our lvl 15 barbarian, Chaotic good for some reason, nothing special he almost died a lot,

Elfcunt: Don't remember his name as it was the usual elven player shenanigans, lvl 18 Ranger, True Neutral, Received 90% of our contempt and always had to fend for himself, because we're not helping him.

Tristan: our other elf, lvl 13 Druid, Neutral Good, The only person in the group that got along with everyone

And Hulk, a lvl 1 Priest, don't remember his alignment, that just joined our merry band.

So We've taken a contract to "help" some villagers that refused to sell their land for a new mining venture, we arrived at the village and had to stop by at the church to get our newest addition, a little of power gaming from the DM, and we found him with some robes with two underage boys on his bed, the two boys ran, the druid's tiger got scared (DM) and killed them both, and I and Cronos proceeded to torture Hulk with our daggers, he got pissed off decided to call upon his gods.


And our DM decided to comply * if* he rolled a 20, the bastard actually did, God or not our retarded warlock decided to lob a fireball towards the god, and obviously failed and got his arm blown off, meanwhile I decided to GTFO and the rest of the party followed suit, the DM not wanting us to get purged said that the god couldn't leave the church, At this point we decided to leave Conan, elfcuck, and Tristan to burn the village (they were so out of alignment anyway) and after I gave Cronos a skeleton hand we proceeded to torture Hulk even more.


A few burned houses later, our good old friend Hulk was a stub being healed by my very painful kind of dark heal, and being raped by a black tentacle monstrosity that Cronos remembered he had, good times, when the rest of our group rejoined us, the elves now decided to remember their alignment and tried to leave us, Tristan barely survived two rounds before a second fireball destroyed his head, good'ol elfcuck just tried to run, but the DM rolled an agility check and he rolled a 1, the only lucky thing was that he was a ranger, falling face first into the ground I proceeded to pummel him with dark energy bolts, until the black tentacle monster caught up made him a stub and proceeded to rape him.


I noticed that Cronos only had 30 HP after the fight, and I thought you know what takes 45HP in one hit, A fireball, It would be so bloody Ironic, done that, he dropped dead, I gathered the Loot from them, and ended the mission.


On the next adventure, the same group except for Hulk, he never came back, different chars lvl 1, dear ol' dumb me decided to make a female monk, you can guess what happened can't ya.