BerkaZerka, The Million Word Malkavian

Member Since


Last Activity

2/21/2017 9:18 PM

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Storygame Count


Duel Stats

0 wins / 0 losses


Sage Exemplar



Mind's Eye USA





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Trophies Earned

Earning 100 Points Earning 500 Points Earning 1,000 Points Earning 2,000 Points Earning 5,000 Points Administrative contributions. Having 3 Storygame(s) Featured Posting 10514 Forum Posts Rated 100.0% of all Stories Given by alexp on 02/22/2013 - For being all-around awesome! Given by BerkaZerka on 01/09/2017 - In memorial of mustache wars long long ago~ Given by EndMaster on 05/31/2013 - For Dead Man Walking, Dungeon Stompage and whatever other cool stories you end up creating. Given by JJJ-thebanisher on 10/14/2013 - Great site presence and top notch AE usage Given by madglee on 04/04/2014 - Exceptional stories and great moderator! Great work, BZ! Enjoy. Given by Sethaniel on 06/14/2014 - Great moderator, amazing game-maker. Given by Will11 on 01/15/2017 - For the fantastic stories, amazing scripting and overall contributions to the site


Chuck Norris Quiz

How well do you know the Incredible Facts About The Awesome Chuck Norris?

25 Questions with Scoring

Featured Story Cows vs. Aliens!

Farmer Brown is on vacation and it's up to Fernando El Fantastico the Bull (that's you!) to save his Herd when Aliens come to harvest them!

(by playing draw poker against a horde of moronic alien invaders!)

Special Thanks to Killa_Robot for playtesting feedback - This Meep's For him! ^v^

Crab Arena!

You are Crab Trainer X! Choose your Crustacean Combatant and Battle for Glory in Crab Arena! The Championship Belt is within your Grasp! Can You Do It? Hell Yes You Can!

Now GO!!!


How To Play

Fight 3 Round Battles with 4 Opponents; and then a 5 Round Battle with the Final Opponent. Each Round you choose an Attack and an Elemental Focus to power it.
CLAW HAMMER beats Body Slam / BODY SLAM beats Double Snip / DOUBLE SNIP beats Claw Hammer
FIRE consumes Air / WATER puts out Fire / EARTH soaks up Water / AIR blows away Earth
A Color-Coded Bar shows the results between the Attacks and Focuses: Green = Win; Yellow = Draw; Red = Lose
Your Attack determines who Wins the Round; the Elemental Focus determines how much Damage you will take and how many Power Points you will gain. Your Wins and Losses at the end of each Battle determine whether you advance or go down in flames.

Featured Story Dead Man Walking (Zombie Survival)

Can you survive the Zombie Apocalypse? While challenging, it's not as hard as the movies would have you believe - where they always make the worst possible decisions for the sake of drama. At least here, you will be offered logical choices amid the foolhardy and your character cares about survival even more than you do. A serious game with gory detail.

Cameos (try to find them all!)
Aman: Hairy bearded sledge guy
applegirl: Coffee mug zombie teen
Betaband: Neighbor’s fish tank brought to you by Betaband
CovElite: The Cannibal Gaunt Zombie
EndMaster: A survivor tells about seeing a black hooded man walking among the zombie hordes and directing them like death itself
Fireplay: A madman with a taste for fire
JMgskills: A zombie wearing a red shirt with the logo “YOU DIED – END GAME.”
Marmotlord: A School Mascot on the run
playa988: A rather short, buzz-cut, zombie in a baggy white t-shirt and jeans that gets sniped
simplesabley: Tomboy survivor girl
SindriV: A mysterious corpse in the street
Solxd7: A police officer shit out of luck
Swiftstryker: Zombie in a speedo
ThisisBo: An oddly “talkative” zombie not terribly interested in eating brains
ugilick: Karate kicking conquistador

Special Thanks To:
Aman; AtomicWaste; blob; Briar_Rose; HoraceTorys; MBrock; playa988; ugilick

(For their invaluable feedback and playtesting efforts!)

Featured Story Dungeon Stompage!

An Item and Character-Stat driven Dungeon Adventure Challenge! Can you survive the perils, defeat the monsters, and win the game?


Special Thanks To:

JMgskills, simplesabley; betaband; Swiftstryker; madglee; October; & urnam0 (who found a second solution to the puzzle chest)

(For their invaluable feedback and playtesting efforts!)

Kill Aman's Mustache

Do you have what it takes to survive the Wrath of Aman's Mustach of Doom?

Are you clever enough to outwit a Penguin with a mallet? Are you man enough to wear a phony mustache? Are you Anime enough to put on a Pikachu suit and head to Vegas?

Find Out Now, In: Kill Aman’s Mustache!

A horror(ble) puzzle of hairy implications with a side of lice...

Note that embedded audio requires windows media player plug-in to hear. You will likely be prompted to allow it if you don't already have it installed.
(Please don't be mean and Rate this game poorly just because it’s a worthless piece of crap. Seriously - you will totally hurt the feelings of the thirteen year old orphan schoolgirl from Korea that I hired to write this and who has very little grasp of grammar and doesn’t speak any Engrish and is dying of toenail cancer – you heartless brutes.)


The King's Logic Puzzle


The king has proposed a contest of intellect.
You have a balance scale and twelve identical looking spheres of gold - except that one is either heavier or lighter than all the rest. Using the scale and only 3 measurements, you must determine which is the 'odd ball' and whether it is lighter or heavier.
If you fail, you get to be court jester for a month. The king has a terrible sense of humor - trust me; you don't want to be court jester (even for just a month). It's part of the reason he holds this contest. It's the only way he can get anyone to 'sign-up' for the job.
If you can correctly guess the 'odd ball,' but not whether it's lighter or heavier than all the others, you get to go free.
But if you can get the right ball AND figure out whether it's lighter or heavier - you get to keep all twelve spheres of gold. They're worth a small fortune - enough to buy your own keep - which would raise you up from lowly Surf to rich Landowner in the blink of an eye.
What do you have to lose - except your dignity...


A Penguin's Fairy Tale

You are 'Penguin,' a small stuffed toy owned by a little girl named Sarah. You love Sarah very much and Sarah loves you. You know this, because Sarah says so quite often. You are Sarah's favorite toy.


Five Pin Code

The following is a 'How To It Guide,' for building a Five Pin Pass Code into your game for the purpose of pass-coding Unlockables, Game Sequels, or the like.

Articles Written

How to use On-Page Variable Tricks
The following discusses the use of the On-Page Variable Code (it literally goes right on the Page in the Story Editor, as opposed to Scripting, which goes into the Scripting Boxes).

Recent Posts

February Flash Fiction Contest Feedback Thread on 2/21/2017 8:53:32 PM
Well that was a neat non-entry bucky - it was enough to make me want to know more about not only how it had gotten to that point, but what the ensuing consequences would be!

v20170008 Update on 2/21/2017 8:35:06 PM
Sweet! ^v^

v20170008 Update on 2/21/2017 8:33:04 PM
The Top 5 Storygames in Need on the main page is really working! Tons of stories are finally getting enough ratings to be ranked. :)

The Weekly Review - Edition 34 on 2/19/2017 6:43:27 PM

February Flash Fiction Contest Feedback Thread on 2/19/2017 6:17:17 PM
I'm really liking this flash fiction contest. The stoties being so short makes them easy to read with an almost poetic feel.

February Flash Fiction Contest Feedback Thread on 2/19/2017 6:13:47 PM
I got a good laugh out of yours. ;)

February Flash Fiction Contest Submission Thread on 2/18/2017 8:31:21 PM

February Flash Fiction Contest Feedback Thread on 2/18/2017 8:17:30 PM
Entry posted.

February Flash Fiction Contest Submission Thread on 2/18/2017 8:14:04 PM
Edit Lock (sort of) ...

February Flash Fiction Contest Submission Thread on 2/18/2017 8:08:11 PM
Word Count 300 The cemetery was north of Harper's Cove, in a quiet area off the beaten path. Its rolling grounds scattered with tall, well-established trees. Familiar maples, stout oaks, and majestic tulips, towering above sycamores, horse chestnuts, and dogwoods - each overshadowing the many hedges and flowering shrubbery adorning the fringe. These lent an air of elegance and solemnity to the cemetery; the autumn colors, just beginning to show, suggesting a hidden garden, rather than some final resting place. I stood, feeling the crisp air brush my face, noting the briny salt carried in from the cove. I could hear it in branches and see it in skittering leaves that danced about before gathered at my feet. It brought to life patriotic flags honoring veterans and crimson ribbons marking firemen. These were ubiquitous here, giving weight to the reverence I felt among them. I observed the tombstones, markers, and shrines. Unique as the people who rested beneath them, they seemed to give a sense of personality and character to those interred. Roughhewn granite, polished marble, hand-carved sandstone, flat gray slate. Some with wrought iron, tarnished plaques, or crumbling faded angels and winged skulls (the antiquated symbols of life and death). Many were covered with moss and lichens, a few ringed in mushrooms, and others clean and new with carefully tended flowers nearby. There were many different kinds, but they all bore a name. I found an eerie grace in it all. This was not a place to be shunned - visited only by the grieving survivors of those passed on. There were no wraiths or specters here, just lingering memories yearning to be shared. Here was a place of dignified beauty; a monument left for the living by which to remember the dead. I am here. If you listen, you can hear my story.