jster02, The Wordsmith
Some people like to call me Jester.
You wake up in the middle of the forest at night, with no memory of how you got there. All you have is a backpack full of Cheez-Its and other essential supplies, along your own wits to help you on your way. As you explore this strange land, you'll find things you never knew could exist, (at least, not that you can remember). You'll meet strange creatures, some friend, others not, and maybe, just maybe, recover your lost memories...
My (rather rushed), entry for the Lone Hero contest. I'll be the first to admit that not all the endings will make you any sort of hero, lone or otherwise, (mainly the ones where you run away from just about every source of conflict, and/or die). But if you're brave enough to do what you think is right, even though it may result in your untimely demise, you may just make yourself a hero yet. In that light, I guess you could say you're a reluctant Lone Hero.
While each route of this story can be understood to some degree on it's own, it is important to play every branch to fully understand the greater story that's being told. I have no intention of revealing everything on the first play through, you'll have to take the time to explore everything to learn all it's secrets.
By the way, on the off chance that you find any glitches or bugs, please tell me. I'd like to know so I can fix them.
Netflix and video games can only go so far when it comes to fighting boredom. Usually the comfort of your own home is more than enough to make you happy on the weekends, but lately something feels off. You tried to rewatching The Office for the six or seventh time, but just couldn't get into it. After scrolling through your entire Steam library consisting of over five hundred games, you couldn't find a single one that looked worth playing. You're used to being relieved about coming home after a long day of work or school, but lately you've found yourself dreading the emptiness of your own home. There's no two ways around it, you're stuck in a rut and it's going to take something major to break you out. Luckily, you have just the thing. Before you have a chance to change your mind, you call up your friend who lives across town and tell him to come over as soon as possible. It doesn't take much to convince him to join you on the ultimate Saturday bike ride.
But little do you know that biking can be a lot more dangerous than it looks. The trails are a hotbed for all manner of suspicious activity. You are about to stumble upon an underground subculture more complex and deadly than you could possibly have imagined. Today, you'll find out whether you're just another neckbeard with a cheap set of wheels, or a true hero and adventurer.
The trails in the story are loosely based on the ones in my own town. Some of the weird and crazy things in this story are exaggerated or completely made up, but there were also some things I pulled directly from my own experience. My town can be kinda strange sometimes. I'll let you decide for yourself what you think is true and what isn't.
Articles WrittenHow to Write Halfway Decent Prose
Recent PostsThe Shittest Story of all Time! on 10/15/2020 10:24:44 AM
Richard is such a creeper name. I'm a mandated reporter, and I'm pretty sure I'd get thrown in jail if I didn't report someone like that within the first five seconds of him opening his mouth. Asking her to kiss him is straight up sexual harassment, or it would be in our culture. My word, I'm still cringing just thinking about it.
Looking for Names on 10/15/2020 2:48:59 AM
Looking for Names on 10/15/2020 1:20:57 AM
Have you tried searching up a name generator? Or, if you feel like adding a little extra level of depth, looking up names that correspond to one of the character's core personality traits?
Shoot up the school - based category on 10/13/2020 2:54:59 AM
Oh... Right. We basically just did that.
Shoot up the school - based category on 10/12/2020 6:47:53 PM
Fair point. I guess it wouldn't make sense to create a new catagory if we destroy another one in the process.
Shoot up the school - based category on 10/12/2020 6:29:32 PM
Has anyone suggested Apoctolyptic yet? I've seen a few zombie stories around here, and I'm sure there are some other subgeneres that could fit in that catagory.
Shoot up the school - based category on 10/12/2020 6:25:29 PM
You guys should have done that back when it was actually a problem. At worst, it would have put them all in one, easy to avoid location. At best, it would have allowed for an easier purging. It's a lot easier to eliminate the undesirables when you can just nuke a whole catagory and be done with it!
The Shittest Story of all Time! on 10/11/2020 2:36:55 PM
Not gonna lie, I actually laughed out loud when she tried to save the dragon that was literally about to torch an entire town of innocent people. Also at the bit with the heart necklace. Those were my favorite shitty moments of this entire chapter. I'm sensing the beginnings of a love triangle between little Ms. Self-insert, Charlie, and the dragon. I'm also getting the feeling that you're about to mash together a whole slew of hackneyed tropes. There's the damsel captured by a dragon who needs to be saved by some sort noble hero, who in this case, will probably turn out to be Charlie. There's probably also going to be some sort of paranormal romance between what's-her-face and the dragon, who just so happens to be able to turn human. She's going to magically turn him into a perfect gentleman, taming his primal desires with the power of love. Lastly, since Charlie is a woman, we're probably going to get the totally new and original message that girls can be big and strong too. Assuming I'm right about all this, I'm having a little trouble figuring out if this combination of so many dumb tropes is too clever to be shitty. (I make a point to avoid stories like this, so I'm not sure how common that sort of thing is). Though, I guess if I actually was able to predict it accurately, that probably means it's still safely on the dumber end of the spectrum.
The Shittest Story of all Time! on 10/10/2020 12:38:50 PM
Isn't getting off to that sort of thing pretty much standard procedure for people who are unironically interested in stories like this? Wouldn't that just prove that she's acting in character?
The Shittest Story of all Time! on 10/10/2020 12:03:54 PM
You know, even though you were working with the shittiest tropes imaginable, and a protagonist who seems to have no personality outside of her stepfather being a complete douchebag, it seems like you were still subconsciously trying to make this into something actually good. Or maybe that's just due to the fact that my expectations for these sorts of stories are already ridiculously low, so when they are attempted by someone who's actually competent I wind up actually enjoying myself somewhat. When you're expecting terrible grammer and unreadable prose, anything easily legible feels like a relief. I also noticed you tried to go for the "plain girl with a perfect body who is somehow oblivious to her own attractiveness" trope for maximum conryness, but in this context, it actually seems to work. Any girl who's grown up in an abusive home with someone who forces her to wear rags and probably makes a lot of less-than-flattering comments about her appearance is bound to think less of herself, no matter how hawt and sexy she happens to be. The thing is, I don't really see a way you could possibly make this less logical without making the stepfather not evil anymore, thus dismanteling the entire plot thus far. If you were going to choose one shitty thing to accidentally make slightly good, I guess this one trope is minor enough that it doesn't make too big of a difference.
Aside from that, everything else about this story is absolute trash so far, so good job...? I think "the old ogre" seems especially stupid and juvinile, definitly something a twelve year old girl would come up with to put in their twighlight fianfic, but not something she would call her own evil stepfather IRL. This is what makes it such a perfectly shitty addition to this story. I also love how the guy who's buying her seems like a literal deamon, because that's totally how all people who advocate for arranged marriages are in real life. All that to say that despite my complaints about this being too good, you've already made a delightfully terrible start. Now go make it worse.
Anyways, I imagine the hunk that inevitably sweeps her off her feet and rescues her is going to turn out to be some sort of weird wearwolf/vampire/lead-singer-in-a-popular-boy-band hybrid, or something equally stupid, so I'm looking forward to seeing that.
Oh, and I know I complained about the grammer being too good, but to be perfectly honest, I don't think I could slog my way through something resembling 90 percent of the stories on Wattpad in that way, even if it's ment as a joke. Maybe it's better to leave that particular element as it is.