A tale of love and hate..

Although this story was well written, it's very different from the typical CYOA found on this site- not that that's necessarily a bad thing!

For me, the main issues were spacing, length of paragraphs, and lack of choice (I only came across two real decisions).

Concerning the first two, to give you an idea: when I originally opened this story, I was immediately taken aback by the huge paragraphs on the page. I often found myself skimming through lines- but not because the story was boring. I only did so because of the gargantuan size they ended up accumulating to. I would recommend that, if you were to make a story in the future, you used proper spacing- it's a great way to convey emotion and separate ideas.

As for choice, you have to remember that this site *is* called "Choose your Story"! When there are only three endings that you have to offer- as you say in your summary- the story becomes very linear- as you also happen to say. This would not be an issue if the choices weren't so... clear, for lack of a better word. When choices immediately lead to cookie-cutter endings, it becomes quite bland. It also makes the reader feel like the true ending is Helena's- which is something you don't want to do. Try to make each choice feel solid.

However, apart from this, the only flaws I could find were an underuse of commas where needed, and not separating the dialogue with spacing. Be that as it may be, this is still one of the better stories on this site. I congratulate you on writing it, and give it a 5/8.

:)

Definitely a lot more story than game. However, it is an amazing story and it made me melt on the inside. There were no grammatical errors, just a few missing spaces. Overall, I really loved this, it reads like a classy romance and is perfect for a hopeless romantic. If you're looking for a little more spice, I recommend you check out some other stories though.

7/8

A very wholesome romance and a very good storyline! You got to stay true to those who’ve always stayed true to you.

awwwwwww

love it

Call me a heartless bastard, but I didn't feel anything. It was a lot of telling how perfect they were for each other, you know, but I didn't feel that much chemistry between the two main lovebirds.

I love this story because for some reason I love to do this type of stuff.

Can´t think of anything else, so take this generic comment...
This was good!

crying my eyes out omg so cute

One of the best stories I ever read