Hank's Journey

a Horror by Ogre11

Player Rating?/8

"Too few ratings to be ranked"
based on 9 ratings since 08/16/2019
played 13 times (finished 0)

Story Difficulty2/8

"walk in the park"

Play Length6/8

"It'll be a while, better grab a SnickersĀ®"

Maturity Level7/8

"anything goes"
Some material may be inappropriate for persons under age 18. If this were a movie, it would probably be R.
Make decisions for Hank as he wanders out into a world that is quite a bit more than it seems. Watch him head into the darkness and see if and how he will find his way back out...or further in...

Please note the maturity rating on this one. It doesn't mean that it's mature, it means that it's nasty sometimes. While yes, there is some humor, it's pretty graphically adult at times, not like most of my stories. Oh, it's not as bad as some other stories I could mention here, but it's different than nearly everything else I've written, so be warned. It's gross, too, in way too many places.

Just in case that wasn't too clear, here is the trigger warning: if you have a trigger, you're warned. I'm not sure anyone should actually read this.

This is mostly a gauntlet style CYOA story, but there is a bit of branch and bottleneck to it as well.

Updated 8.16.19 to fix a few typos.

Entry for the Succubus Contest, 2019: Winner of the contest!

Player Comments

I took the Lulu route first, and man did I laugh up a storm. You have a way with gross out, horrific humor that made me click through every single page on this story until completion eagerly. Even some of the links contained pretty clever subtle humor, particularly when Hank wasn't in his right mind, that added to the story's character.

However, that's not all. I felt for Hank from the very start of the story, he's the everyman. When he wakes up with blisters on his nethers, I felt his shock and pain. Most of all I felt his displeasure with normalcy, which makes ultimately succumbing to the succubus not the worst ending you can get (in my opinion).

I only noticed a few errors, and they were typos, otherwise I really like this story.
-- TheChef on 8/12/2019 11:19:38 PM with a score of 0
I really enjoyed this story. The writing was very good and all of the characters felt believable. It had a good amount of humor and made me smile quite a bit. I'll have to play through this a few more times to get more endings. Great work Ogre.
-- TurnipBandit on 7/31/2019 2:39:21 PM with a score of 0
In terms of the writing, I think this is the best of Ogre's stories so far, of the ones I've ready. The dialog is believable, the characters are drawn with sharp detail, the scenes are set up effectively, and the pacing is about right. I know I've panned a couple of his past stories, but none of the aspects that bothered me before seem to be present here.

In terms of branching, I didn't actively seek out may of the endings. Basically, I figured out that if you behave like a good human being -- avoid Sasha and make sure you're ready for work on Monday morning -- you have a good shot of surviving the tale.

But this is a succubus story after all, so why run from the central story line? This led to an interesting dichotomy in the choices: you have the option to do what you know is best, as the sober reader who can guess what is in store, or you can just choose to do what Hank would do, and just enjoy the ride.

In terms of some of the bottlenecking that occurs, I did encounter a continuity error. Early in the story, after the first encounter, I chose to go to urgent care. I was given a fistful of prescriptions, picked them up at the drug store, and meanwhile receive text alert after text alert that my bank account had been sucked dry and my meager credit limit (really? only $750? I guess it's been a while since I was 21) had been maxed out. Since Sasha was clearly the crux of the story, I finally relented and decided to meet her at the bar. At this point one story path clearly merged with another, in which much of what I just read never happened. And unfortunately, all mention of the prescription meds and the identity theft was completely forgotten.

But overall, I really enjoyed this story.
-- Bill_Ingersoll on 7/30/2019 10:43:07 PM with a score of 0
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