Highschool Lockdown

Player Rating2.92/8

"#519 overall, #21 for 2016"
based on 130 ratings since 02/29/2016
played 1,352 times (finished 195)

Story Difficulty3/8

"trek through the forest"

Play Length4/8

"A well spent lunch break"

Maturity Level6/8

"I'll need to see some identification"
Some material may be inappropriate for persons under age 16. If this were a movie, it would probably between PG-13 and R.

Tags

Humor

How would you react if armed men came into your school? Would you be a badass and save everyone? Or would you sneak away undetected? The decision is yours to make...

 

Comments are appreciated, Kay thx! :D

Player Comments

I had a little trouble believing how some of choices played out, although I admit that my opinion is biased from the start because I found the premise rather problematic given how many tragedies have involved guns and schools. It really didn't work for me as the setting of, what I assume, was supposed to be a wryly humorous adventure, and I really didn't have it in me to explore all the paths.

That being said, what's there is decently written, if in need of a little bit of proofreading and some more plot development. If you don't have a problem with the premise, it isn't all too long, has a couple of unique endings, and might be worth a playthrough or two.
-- the_quiller on 3/2/2016 4:57:20 PM with a score of 0
Hm. This didn't have a lot in common with the way people would genuinely feel when caught during a genuine terrorist incident (I remember going to the scene of the Luxor Massacre in Egypt and seeing bloody fingerprints on the walls...) but it did have a lot in common with how people would react in a computer game... I think a greater degree of realism and a few checks for grammar mistakes would be useful (you should never have questions like "you see 3 guys patrolling what do you do" because that leads to a distinctive "meh" reaction).
I think you have a good premise and some promising alternative choices worked out here but from a random reader I'd recommend revamping the writing to make it more gritty, more sensory (talk about individual actions, reader's responses, the emotions of other people in dramatic terms etc) and generally more lifelike, then you'd have something a lot stronger here :)
Also there seemed a distinct indifference on the part of the author every time I died. It's bad enough dying, it's worse if the omniscient narrator doesn't care much about it :P
-- Will11 on 2/29/2016 3:45:55 PM with a score of 0
Yeah, we honestly love the ending. No school! Yay!
-- TestingJest on 9/22/2017 1:17:32 AM with a score of 0
awesome
-- Megaman_Model_O on 9/17/2017 9:12:57 PM with a score of 0
It was fun.
-- Missle0945 on 9/4/2017 9:04:39 PM with a score of 0
Wow just bad
-- CeruleanFlare on 12/15/2016 5:57:20 PM with a score of 0
I funny story i really liked the crime syndicate ending
-- Tr3yofakind on 12/15/2016 10:07:45 AM with a score of 0
Hey guys, thanks so much for all the feedback. With the information everyone provided I am working on a story that I hope will be longer, proofread, smarter, and better than my previous ones.
The reasons I made this so horrible was
1. I'm horrible at writing (I got a shitty English mark)
2. Just for fun, I love making my own, crappy, jokes and publishing them for all to see.
3. Feedback (this is a big one) The feedback helps me in the future and making a shitty story first helps people point out flaws that I would otherwise miss in later developments.
So thanks to everyone for helping me become better in something that may or may not stay in my life
-- RickBurker on 12/10/2016 7:13:15 PM with a score of 0
The choices had no meaning, and to me came across as ridiculous, I guess the motive of the character was somewhat there.
-- Zulutrader on 12/8/2016 1:45:41 PM with a score of 0
I used the force,daddy!
-- epix on 10/13/2016 8:17:51 PM with a score of 0
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