Hello everyone. It's Turnip. Hard to believe it's been half a year since I was on here. I had asked for my account to be banned on here a few months back. I’m only back on for a moment, because I have something that should be said. Less for my own benefit, but more for the benefit of somebody that I care about. But maybe it will help me out too. I’m not really sure.

When I joined the forum I didn’t expect it to ever have as much of an impact on me as it has. I met people that I doubt I’ll ever regret having the pleasure of knowing and that counts for something. It’s also brought me a lot of stress. Being on here, that is. And most of that stress stemmed from my own perception of things, and not so much from how things actually were. But I just wanted to tell the people here that I appreciated you all. And that all of you contribute to making CYS the place it is. While I doubt everyone thinks that it is a very great place, I did. So thank you all.

So onto to why I’m actually here. Some of you maybe noticed when I left back in March, I had been acting erratically and not exactly right for awhile. There was a long period of time when everything was just kind of going downhill and I reached one of the lowest points I’ve been. It’s hard to really explain things. I’m not mentally well. And over the years, that mental illness had gotten progressively worse. Trauma, a lack of proper medication and diagnosis, and other factors contributed to it worsening. And it reached the point where I had essentially lost most of my lucidity when it came to my sense of self. The identity I created to try to help me cope with things ended up becoming less of an escape, and became something that I believed. So the person I was when I was on the site isn’t really who I am. Just something I used to cope with everything else. And something that I believed was me. So, I guess that’s mostly it. I’m an American, have only been out of the US a few times, haven’t seen my father and stepmother in over 5 years due to their abusive treatment, have one sibling, a brother who lives across the country, was very close with my three cousins who lived with us for a time, was actually called Turnip Bandit by an old lady, am getting treatment now, and I don’t really know what else to say. Or what else I can clear up. I guess just assume everything I said up to this point wasn’t true. Probably just easier that way. 

So I suppose that’s it. I’d do some kind of reintroduction to who I am but I don’t really think any of us need that. But yeah, that’s what I wanted to say. I figured I’d post this in the thread I really did care about. But I doubt there will be any more from me in this thread. I threw out all my notes on Colored Lines. Same with the original written drafts. I didn’t intend to come back here, really. But I suppose there’s a lot of things I didn’t really intend to happen. I’m sorry to anybody who might have been hurt by me. Thank you all for being who you are. I appreciate you all. And I’m happy to have met you all.