Player Comments on Crash Landing

Cringe writing and too many spaces. -10 points cause ordering off the kiddie menu is the way to go for smaller proportions. Ain't no one gonna beat me up for that!

Short and sweet

ending was kinda abrupt. i escaped tho

I mean it was alright it was just kind of random what my choices were. The mechanic ended up being a sleaze bag for no reason and if you don't leave the planet you rot poor and alone which is also not explained.

Minimal effort was put into an interesting concept once again. I would have liked to explore more of this alien planet instead of dying of mundane things like food poisoning, glass slicing my neck, getting shot by the mechanic because I called him a dirtbag, and oh yes rotting.

I mean the writing was ok there just wasn't much length or branching here to be called a story much less an entertaining one at that.

Good story. I wish there was more development to this storygame. With so many options ending in a strange death or rotting alone, I was determined to find more than the one path to escape. I failed. I’m sure I clicked on every link, but it’s late so maybe not... ?

There is certainly some potential for this story. With a bit more development, I would increase my rating to a 4 at least.

Maybe make some other ways to escape? Or allow the ability to live happily ever after with a nice family?

it was cool and a cool story

A very sad tale
As the engine fails to start
Died waiting for Dick

Pretty boring

Quite a good story. Its too easy to escape.

Nice game quite fun

Sorry Dick, I want that ship...

Not that great. Promising, but execution was iffy. I feel that if you put a bit more effort into this story, it would be quite good. However, at its current state, it is mediocre at best. Nothing against your writing - it's good. However, I just feel that a lack of effort went into this. I look forward to your future works, but learn from this.

It's not a bad story, but I agree on too many deaths, especially the poisoned food, that's not even an instant death, because once you choose to order it, whatever you do after that, you're screwed anyway :D, you can only postpone your death of one move if you protest and don't eat it as soon, but after that choice you can only retreat and eat it, poisoning yourself or stick to your guns, so you get thrown out, but this time, you "randomly" die because of broken glass shards, come on, that's funny but ridiculous and random, along with not offering at least a way out of that :).
Then the cynical line that assumes I rot poor and alone.

its too easy

It was good, but could have been a lot more in depth. It all seemed a bit quick and easy. You could have explored the Alien Planet and had tasks to complete before you could fly away.

It was kind of boring

Well it wasn't bad, but I really don't understand why you'd include the choice of "The engine starts" or "The engine doesn't start". I think the idea behind having choices is that people get to choose what they think is the best, smartest or most interesting of the options. It's like if there was a CYS where one of the options was "You're fighting a monster. Do you kill the monster and save the village or does the monster kill you and eat you?" What's the point?

pics helped but lack of plot and details hurt. overall a 3 and a half

Nice, telling you the truth, i dont like pinball, the alien pic was great. Anyway...5/8

ok

You might not have seen any storygame here.

Cool

do not take this to harsh but it seemed pointless

I died of food poisoning and NOT from a giant crash landing? What kind of logic is this?

I get to choose if it starts or not, that made me lol.

This was way too short, and just dull all around. I gave it a 2 because your spelling and grammar wasn't bad.

What's this?

i.....won?

Really meh. You can do way better than this, I would normally tell you to go read some of the better stories on the site, but I think you already have done quite a bit of that so just try and emulate them a little better.

Well, this wasn't really worth my time playing. I don't want to be rude, but it was a bit random (and it sounded like a serious game too). The weird thing was the last choice, "It's starts" "It doesn't start up".

If you choose for it to start, the engine comes on and you fly away and win, okay. But how come when you choose for it to not start, there is no engine in it. That makes no sense! Anywho, 3/8.

Just to let you know, My Rating isn't mine. It's my dopey little brother's.

is there a real ending

Firstly, that has to be the most defunct pinball machine ever built.

Secondly, you need to make the experience last longer.

Thirdly, I wouldn't advise the player being able to make decisions they should have no influence over. (ie does the ship start or not)

How can you choose whether or not it starts? Other than that, the story was ok, just work on the Realism.

good game olny to many deaths